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11yr old DD too scared to go upstairs alone

(10 Posts)
Ilovetoridecamels Thu 29-Nov-12 16:59:46

Is she afraid to go anywhere else?

BedHog Thu 29-Nov-12 12:44:09

I wondered if there is a 'The Making of.....' type programme available on iplayer or youtube etc., preferably of the Scream series but any horror film would do. It might help demystify it for her if she can see that it's just a load of animatronics, people dressed up, special effects, atmospheric music etc. Might make it a bit less scary.

foofooyeah Thu 29-Nov-12 12:36:58

Poor thing.

Just reading a couple of the replies - one thing perhaps you could keep a radio playing quietly upstairs so it doesnt seem like its quiet and dark up there?
I dont see any harm in going to see GP - they may have advice.
Also just make sure she is aware that you acknowledge her fears, and dont think she is being silly (which I am sure you dont) may make her feel better.

My 9 year old son doesnt like being upstairs on his own

thebody Thu 29-Nov-12 12:12:32

Hi I saw a film at school called 'stranger danger' or a similar title. I was about 10 and that would make it 1974.

I was absolutely traumatised and terrified and still remember the scene of a little girl crying while a huge shadow of a man towered over her.

No one else in the class was affected and some found it funny.

I refused to go out by myself( and then we all as kids did and played out for hours) I started wetting the bed and hated the dark.

It passed of course and in those days no one thought to offer or seek help.

Your poor dd.. Am sure she will get over this but it will take time and love.

My dd was badly hurt in feb and now has PTSD so here again but we have accessed help for her. But at the end of the day kids do recover.

Hugs to you both.

PlopButNOPudding Sun 11-Nov-12 11:36:22

Wow- hapykatie, were we at the same sleepover?! I was also traumatised by Nightmare on Elm St at a sleepover when I was 12 and was also scared of being alone, especially at night or upstairs.
I also was too embarrassed to tell my mum- but all the things above helped me too.
Having a radio on upstairs was great as it is a bit like tv- youvdont feel as alone, and other than that it's just time.
Not feeling like I was the only one going through it and having some support would have been a great help.

happykatie Wed 19-Sep-12 20:49:26

Hi there, I haven't posted on MN for about 4 years but I read your post and it hit such a chord I just had to reply. I don't have any brilliant advice to offer but I thought your daughter might find it comforting to know that she is not the only one who feels like this. I felt exactly the same as her when I was younger and it was an on/off problem for me from about 12 until about 13ish (it was Nightmare on Elm Street that I watched at a sleepover - to this day I wish I hadn't!) I can remember feeling really embarrassed about it so I never told my mum, I just dreaded the time when the rest of the house went to bed and I used to long to sleep with my sister. I can remember crying with exhaustion because I was so tired but I couldn't bear to turn the light off or shut my eyes. I know it sounds really simple but things like keeping the light on upstairs all night long really,really helped (I used to really panic when someone turned it off) I also found the sound of the washing machine at night really comforting as it sounded so 'everyday' and normal. During the day it also really helped when my Mum did everyday chore type things upstairs that I helped with because it just made upstairs feel like a safer place iyswim I guess in time I just grew out of it because even the scariest things grow mundane when you've thought about them for a long time.

I hope your daughter is ok, she's not going to feel like this forever but I know how scared I used to feel, you sound really sympathetic which is lovely.

cravingyorkiebar Wed 19-Sep-12 18:48:11

I think I would take her to the gp who may be able to arrange some counselling/ support.

I've not seen scream4 as I hate that sort of thing but one thing that stuck out from your post is that they turned it off half way through. Usually the baddie would die at the end but she wouldn't have seen that hence maybe in her mind she is remembering the scarey stuff to keep the audience without the resolution of an ending. Just a thought... A counsellor may help her to find the resolution.

AlmostAGoldHipster Wed 19-Sep-12 18:46:47

My youngest is nearly 11 and has never watched a horror film. She hates going upstairs alone at night time. She always asks someone to go up with her but will just about cope if the dog accompanies her!

I'm hoping she'll grow out of it.

hairybeast Wed 19-Sep-12 18:36:53

Anyone? sad

hairybeast Wed 19-Sep-12 18:29:58

DD1 stayed over a friends house and they put Scream 4 on. DD had said she didn't want to watch it as it is a 15 but they put it on anyway. DD became so scared they eventually agreed to turn it off. This was about 6months ago but she is still absolutely petrified! She refuses to go upstairs alone (even in the day) and sleeps with DD2 (5yrs) every night. If she needs a bath/shower we have to go up and stay with her the whole time. It's really upsetting her, keeps asking us to help to get over it, she says it's taking over her life. Would it be worth speaking to a GP? Does anyone have any suggestions? She no longer goes to this 'friends' house btw!

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