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Oh bum, bum

(5 Posts)
Polgara2 Mon 19-Feb-07 16:50:29

Mum (83) has recently lost her brother 3 weeks ago, didn't take it too well obviously. Is just about getting back on track and now I've just had a phone call from my cousin to say my auntie is at death's door and may not last the week!!
So oh wise ones the question is .....do I tell dm to be prepared and risk her fretting from now on in OR do I wait until it happens and just tell her then? We've already had the 'it'll me be next' when my uncle died, god knows how she'll take this, although she was a lot closer to her brother. She was very ill herself last year and surprised us all by recovering at all. I seem to have spent most of my adult life looking after dm - don't get me wrong I love her to bits but it IS hard sometimes .

fortyplus Mon 19-Feb-07 22:35:18

I think it would be mean not to tell her. After all, she may wish to see her and say her last goodbyes (if it comes to that).
3 weeks is very early to be making any sort of recovery from the loss of a family member. My dad died nearly 3 years ago and my mum still hasn't got over it.

Polgara2 Mon 19-Feb-07 22:47:45

Well I know what you mean but she wouldn't be able to see her - it would be too much for her AND apparently auntie is too out of it to recognise anyone anyway. They haven't actually seen each other for years - they didn't always get on when they were younger (they used to speak on the phone but have both ended up too deaf for any conversation to make any sense!) BUT she is her last remaining sibling. BUT she worries about everything in the nth degree (including whether the grass is too long) so don't want to cause extra stress iyswim. Hmmmm.

fortyplus Mon 19-Feb-07 23:12:42

Tricky one...

How did it go in the end?

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