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(11 Posts)
Tiredallthetimelaura Wed 17-May-17 16:29:40

This is going to sound random - but I'm at my wits end, as a parent, where would I stand if I sent my 9 yr old son into school wearing a pair of glasses with a hidden camera attached? He is a glasses wearer, so that wouldn't attract any attention, and of course I would not share any footage at all with anybody. But my son is getting bullied, and with no proof we are repeatedly hitting dead ends! All advice welcome, thank you smile

JoWithABow Wed 17-May-17 21:33:56

I'm fairly sure filming/recording people without their consent, especially under 16s is an offence. Can see why it's tempting.
Is there another way of getting evidence? Do they use mobiles, have they sent horrible texts for example. Can you ask the school what evidence they would need to take this further, or asked them what they suggest?
Have you escalated the schools lack of help with the governors or with the local authority?
There's no way I'd use a hidden camera in a pair of glasses as I think you'll massively detract from the main issue of the bullying and get in trouble yourself.

Tiredallthetimelaura Wed 17-May-17 22:25:21

I thought so, that was my niggling doubt. The bullying isn't actually coming from a child, shall we say!
Me and my husband have been down to school so many times I've lost count, and they just close ranks. We live in a small village, and the Governors are made up mainly of the ' village clique ' So it's very off putting and we've contacted ofsted to be told that because our child is a Sen/Senco child there is nothing they can do. He was belittled just today and yesterday my son made a statement that broke my heart. He told me that a new boy was in his class (I was already aware of this, the little boy has been there for 2 weeks) my son stated that he liked the boy being there because the teacher doesn't pick on me anymore, the teacher picks on him. There is so much wrong in that statement that it breaks my heart! My little boy has learning difficulties, dyslexia and is deaf. He has fallen 4 yrs behind, finally got the school to admit this about 4 months ago, they are now going through the EHCP system for him. He has a radio aid for class, his teacher refuses to wear it, my son also suffers from anxiety, his teacher is aware of all this, but she's 'old school', won't make adjustments. I sent my son in today with radio aid and receivers and told him to hand them to his teacher before registration. Of course this made him anxious as he knew what the outcome would be. Anyway, upon picking him up, I 'yet again' asked him, did your teacher wear it and he replied - she saw me walk over with it in my hand and she said, ' I need to talk to your mum, before YOU change the way I operate'
She then took it off him, placed it on her desk and left it there, all day! There is so much more xx

JoWithABow Wed 17-May-17 22:43:03

That's awful. I'm so sorry your little boy and you are going through this flowers
Could you get in touch with a charity that supports deaf children, or learning difficulties and ask their advice? Or go to a reporter from a local paper and ask for them to investigate (clutching at straws!).
Is moving schools an option? I know you shouldn't have to but...
That thing your son said to you breaks my heart too and I don't even know you, you must be so so sad.
I can't believe ofsted can't do anything because of Sen though? Maybe post what you've put in your second post into 'the staff room' section or 'primary education' and see if you can get any teachers to give you advice?

PickAChew Wed 17-May-17 22:51:25

You need to take this up with your LA as part of the EHCP evaluation. You can be an active particpant in that, btw - you should be an active participant. Don't settle for it being something done half heartedly with limited input from you before being told he doesn't qualify. You don't know if he doesn't qualify unless he's properly assessed by both the school and external parties such as an ed psych, occupational therapist and anyone else relevant to his situation.

But the school, and this teacher in particular need to be read the equality act.

Tiredallthetimelaura Wed 17-May-17 23:23:21

We actually printed all that out and the disability discrimination act also. We have told the school more times than I care to remember that they are depriving our son of his education! Some, yes SOME, of the excuses we have had regarding the radio aids have been - it makes my neck itchy, it interferes with my neck scarf/jewellery, I don't wear it because I just shout louder, he responds some of the time when not wearing it, I don't understand it/the technology, and so on.... (please note, that this was a whole group of teachers and TA's) About 1 yr ago, a book was introduced to keep tabs on the useage, who was using it, and how it was being used. This was the idea of the head teacher to pacify us, what was being written in the book by teachers didn't correspond to what my son was saying, then 1 day there was a school trip (it MUST be worn) again, upon picking my son up he said the radio aid wasn't taken. I checked the book and his teacher (the one who picks on him) had written myself and my son had a chat this morning and decided not to take radio aid as a teacher will be with him at all times
I was furious so I asked my son why he had agreed to this and he said *no, my teacher said to me, O, we're I'm not taking it as I can't be bothered to pass it around all day to other people.
Off we went down to school AGAIN, I told them there was no point doing the book if it was just full of lies. My son has a teacher of the deaf who visits him at school once every term, again, the school put everything into place upon her visits, and even though me and husband have repeatedly told her the problems at school, nothing gets done, she is lovely but to say she is non confrontational is an understatement!
This teacher has screamed at my child in class, quite reading, so all the class heard, and she made him cry, to which she then told him off again for crying and when he couldn't stop crying on demand, she sent him off to play outside. My son told me a 2nd teacher was present for this, so I collared her, and asked for the truth, reminding her that if I found out any lies It would be her career in jeopardy too. She confirmed everything my son had said, and the reason he got screamed at, humiliated and embarrassed.... because he was looking for his folder (wasn't where he had left it) and he told the 2nd teacher he thought his no 1 teacher had moved it. So the 2nd teacher asked her if she'd moved it and that's when she called my son over and started screaming at him.

PickAChew Thu 18-May-17 00:26:37

Ask the teacher if she genuinely values her fashion accessories over not being taken to tribunal for disability discrimination.

PickAChew Thu 18-May-17 00:31:08

Be loking at SENDIST, in the meantime and dropping hints.

If teacher is genuinely old school, then she's probably looking forward to being given more time to find change to buy something and so on.

keeplooking Thu 18-May-17 01:01:49

To be perfectly honest, if I were in your shoes, I think I would be tempted to just go for it with the camera/mic idea. What's the worst that can happen? And it might get you the evidence you need to confront the school. Are the children allowed watches? Maybe one with a hidden camera? Good luck to you and your ds (and the new boy). angry on your

JoWithABow Thu 18-May-17 08:59:07

I know what you mean keeplooking - after reading the ops second post I began to think that too...

elephantscansing Thu 18-May-17 09:02:17

In your situation I'd definitely do it. Send him in with the hidden camera. The teacher sounds terrible. And the school sounds worse than useless.

Failing that, how about moving your son? I don't think I could trust the school again and your poor ds deseves so much more.

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