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13yo son bullied over his underwear

(11 Posts)
NormalJane Fri 17-Mar-17 15:45:30

Dear Mumsnetters,

Looking for some advise, my son (13) has confessed to being teased about the type of underwear he wears. It's verbal and physical, other boys grabbing his underwear, trying to give him a wedgie etc. It's all come about because whoever yanked his underwear last has ripped them, and I've noticed and asked him. He started year 8 this year and it seems it started at end of year 7 and has continued in to year 8.

He wears briefs/slips/pants, whatever you want to call them. He once tried out some boxers but they lasted about a day before he declared his hatred for them. He's also tried trunks (the tight boxers) but also didn't particularly like them.

It seems he's now the only one in the class to wear them, and the teasing is happening while changing for PE....

It's got him quite down, out of his usual sorts for himself.

He's adamant he doesn't want to wear boxers.


TheWildRumpyPumpus Fri 17-Mar-17 15:49:29

My thoughts are that your sons underwear choices are up to him and we don't need a discussion about boys and their underpants on MN.

Wishiwasmoiradingle2017 Fri 17-Mar-17 15:50:51

He is being bullied and school should treat it as such. .
As embarrassed as ds will likely be he is being bullied.

Cocolepew Fri 17-Mar-17 15:51:03

You should be getting the bullying stopped not getting him to try different underwear.

bonbonours Fri 17-Mar-17 15:52:41

The bullying is the issue nit the underwear. He should be entitled to wear whatever underwear he likes without fear of bullying. School need to sort this out.

UnicornButtplug Fri 17-Mar-17 15:52:48

I would speak to the school about the bullying but it os quite unusual for him to still be in underpants.

Can he try trunks aggain maybe in a size up?

relaxitllbeok Fri 17-Mar-17 15:53:48

Tell the school. That's serious and they should ensure it doesn't happen any more, if necessary by supervising better in the changing rooms. (Something a bit similar happened in my DC's school; I had reply to my email within minutes and the headmaster had dealt with it personally by the end of the day: that's how seriously they took it.)

You can ask school not to let those who have been behaving badly know that it was he who told, which will be plausible since obviously others will have witnessed what's going on and any concerned parent could have reported it (I did!)

Gaaaah Fri 17-Mar-17 15:57:29

I just told my dh about this thread. He admitted that he didn't like wearing boxers to begin with and used to wear briefs underneath his boxers for a while. Might that be an option for him, even if it's only on pe days?

That said the bullying needs tackling. He should be able to wear whatever he likes without being bullied.

NormalJane Fri 17-Mar-17 16:01:43

Thanks for the replies guys, my sentiments too regarding the situation - I don't really see why he should have to compromise. He's free to do and wear as he chooses and he says he doesn't like boxers or trunks ... and that's just fine by me.

I'll have a chat to the school and see if things can be straightened out.

FannyFifer Fri 17-Mar-17 16:02:04

Briefs are seen as what little boys wear I think.
DS took a while to get used to boxers but no way wld he wear briefs past around age 9-10, as yes, folk who did got slagged.
Comfiest ones he found were the tight fit ones from Next.

Wrestpin Sat 18-Mar-17 08:52:47

That's not nice sad if it's got to the point where they've physically broken something then it's gone way too far - I imagine that must have been really quite painful and no student has the right to cause physical harm to another ... certainly not to such an area.

My DS is 11 and also wears briefs, he also isn't interested in other types - I'd really not be too happy if I found out he was being bullied over something so trivial and so personal.

Is DS willing to talk about it a bit more to you? Is there a main antagonist and then a select couple of individuals joining in? His friends in the class, how do they react to it?

The idea of wearing boxers over his briefs could be a good idea, I know giving in to a bully isn't what you want to do. But they'll be too stupid to realise it's a double bluff.

Also, American brands of briefs (Hanes and Fruit of the Loom) are much longer in the leg and come somewhere been the UK style of briefs and trunks. We had to pick some up for DS while on holiday last year as I'd forget to pack him any underwear, oops confused personally I thought they felt like sandpaper, but DS was really quite happy with them!

Hope it all gets sorted!

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