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What can we do?

(4 Posts)
Annahibiscuits Tue 14-Mar-17 06:47:43

I came into the 'Bullying' board via Active Conversations, to offer advice on a thread, where my dds experience was similar

I am horrified to find there even IS a 'Bullying' board and so many threads.

It seems very common that no support is given to the victims of bullies, by schools. My dd had emotionally induced symptoms; vomitting 50+ times a day and 'sensory issues' as a result. She is under the care of a clinical paedeatrician, a community paediatrician and a social worker; and she takes daily medication.

This is AWFUL, but really actually, quite a normal human response to prolonged repeated physical and verbal attacks

What can we do?

Surely we can effect some change in schools whereby there is focus on the victims. ONE, the focus was ENTIRELY on the bully and supporting him with his issues. Nothing was done to support my dd. How was she supposed to deal with that herself aged 4-6?? It is hard for adults. We shouldn't be expecting kids to handle this kind of abuse

TrollTheRespawnJeremy Tue 14-Mar-17 21:38:54

It's a really good point, but realistically teachers are ridiculously stretched as it is- so even the really good ones cannot be as invested as they would like or be as intuitive to children's needs.

I'm sure if you ask any teacher they'd love and do try to iron this out - but the current school system setup is running against them.

Annahibiscuits Wed 15-Mar-17 13:03:04

That certainly appears to be the justification troll

I think, in that case, schools are not fit for purpose

My minimum criteria from a school, is that my children will be kept safe from harm. That cannot be compensated for by good academic outcome. The school I removed my dd from was ofsted outstanding

You wouldn't need to have been especially perceptive or intuitive to recognise my dd was suffering psychological effects of been assaulted on a regular basis. I think that is true of most cases. All the effort and resource was directed at supporting the perpetrator

TrollTheRespawnJeremy Wed 15-Mar-17 19:34:14

It was the same when I was school. In hindsight, the perpetrator was a 'looked after' child and so their needs came above mine.

It's a very difficult thing to navigate. My only advice would be to move school. Not to another one in the area- literally a whole family move to another region. It's the only way to have a truly 'fresh' start.

I hope your DD is making progress, it's really not fair x

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