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Bullying

Requesting a plan to support DD after bullying

3 replies

T1mum3 · 07/09/2016 21:41

A girl in my DD's class "picked" on my DD last year (reception). The girl is very physical and there was pushing and "tapping" but also frequently tells her she's not allowed to play with the group. There were also three physical incidents which resulted in lasting issues (hitting her round the head with a stick leaving a mark that lasted for several hours, picking her up and dropping her which resulted in a sprained ankle and lastly, at the end of term, twisting her nipple until the skin around it was grazed and bleeding - the scabs and bruises lasted for three weeks). School starts again tomorrow but today was "dropping off bags" day. I repeatedly asked for a plan to support her but nothing arose. In the Autumn term it was dismissed as "two strong characters" but I pushed the issue and repeatedly asked if there was anything my DD could do behaviour-wise to stop this, but was told that, actually, no. My DD has not been physical with this child and tries to be her friend because she thinks this will make the girl be nice to her. She has never had any behavioural issues and is generally kind and well mannered. She isn't a shrinking violet and is quite tall for her age, which I think contributes to the sense that she can look after herself, despite the fact that she is a July birthday. I spoke to her new form teacher today to ask what plan was in place and was told that they had given them pegs at the opposite end of the row and that my DD needed to make sure she told a teacher. The form teacher also started wittering about needing to keep "characters" apart and that they can't really do anything until there is a further incident. The girl in question has also exhibited the same behaviour to other children, including biting a girl on the cheek, but has a particular thing for my DD. My next step is to request a meeting with the Head to discuss safeguarding and anti-bullying, and I have also requested something written down from the form teacher which we can discuss. Is this reasonable? What else should I be doing? I'm pretty upset that it's had a really negative effect on my DD's first year of schooling and it doesn't look like things are going to change. :(

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CodyKing · 09/09/2016 06:37

Have you read the complaints policy?!

It should detail the schools responsibilities - for example contacting the other child's parents for each incident - even a note home

Are you following up each incident in writing to the school? There's no protocol for them to keep things in writing - so you should - further to our chat today which we agreed X and you'd consider Y - please can we aet a review date

They may not come back to you but you have evidence in writing

Same - request a meeting in writing with the head teacher - you should discuss this from your DD point of view DD feels DD thinks DD is scared DD won't - etc stops you feeling angry.

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T1mum3 · 10/09/2016 10:47

Thank you - in the end the deputy head called us and we had a really good meeting so I'm feeling much more positive about this year :)

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mrbear444 · 18/09/2016 14:05

Hi T1mum I'm glad you are feeling positive about your meeting. I have just discovered my DD has been subjected to bullying over a long period of time, a couple of incidents I knew about others I am only just coming to hear about now. I am planning to ask for a meeting with the school , have you any suggestions of how I should manage the meeting and what I should ask the school to do. TIA

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