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16 year old daughter taking GCSE's being bullied

(5 Posts)
Burrluckk Mon 09-May-16 22:51:32

Hi anyone out there
I need some advice my DD 16 has had a horrific month at school due to her 3 closest friends turning on her which was instigated by one of them in particular. I could go on all night but long story short each of the bullying girls given a "contract" which stops them harassing my daughter but this hasn't stopped the vicious lies and gossip being spread about her such as a text from the worst girls mum telling me my DD takes drugs and messes around with random men which is not true. My DD a prefect and high achiever and popular with teachers and others. Others joining in now and final straw was her leavers assembly last week (she's still at school) where she was excluded by many people. As a last resort my DD studying at home and only going in for GSCEs, something I told the school today and there response was a meeting in 2,weeks time, literally that was it and this was a message left by someone in admin. I can't express how much my DD has gone downhill and I've never seen her so unhappy it's horrendous please help xx

pippistrelle Tue 10-May-16 09:42:23

This must be incredibly wearing, and I really feel for your daughter. A meeting in two weeks time is not acceptable, so I suggest you don your armour, call the school, and tell them so. Check what their anti-bullying policy says about timescales for intervention, and hold them to it. If it doesn't mention timescales, then point out that this is a deficiency they must put right. Insist on a meeting in the next couple of days.

Will your daughter be going on to a different school or college for A levels? Is so, it might be that school think they can just ignore the problem as they'll all be moving on in a few weeks. Well, they can't. But you might have to push really hard. Ask which member of staff is responsible for safeguarding, and speak to them as well as any other channel of communication you already have.

Best wishes to you and your daughter.

Burrluckk Tue 10-May-16 09:47:25

Ahh thank you so much amazingly so she is staying there for 6th form which they know about !!!

Tamarandave Sun 15-May-16 15:09:30

It is no co-incidence that your daughters friends have turned on her at this moment. There is surely a concious or sub-concious attempt to derail her and cause her to fail at this hurdle. The green eyed monster.

If she is down and depressed, she will fall below her high standards and while you may say its fine and not to worry and'just do your best' etc, it will bother her a lot now and in the future if she falls below her level.

If her school is not co-operative, and since time is short, do what you can to make this a happy time for her at home. Spend time with her and do fun things together or as a family. Minimise her time in school. Make sure she is aware that you are happy for her to go to another 6th form or college if she would rather not do A-level at her current school. Start up a 'feel better' account whereby money you may have given to her in the future eg for graduation or for a gift etc is instead paid into a box at home each time she gets bullied. Then she can treat herself each week to lift the spirits.

I would give very different advice for a younger child being bullied, and the advice I have given is only meant to be applicable in this case.

Tamarandave Sun 15-May-16 15:11:43

I would add to my previous message to say that giving her some extra responsibility/jobs to do (even though exams are here) is a good idea. The more she can be distracted and kept active and on the go the better.

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