Advanced search

Bullying or just not been accepted

(8 Posts)
whereismagic Sat 10-Jan-15 23:49:22

I am at my wits end and reeling after this afternoon party where I could see exactly what's happening. My son started reception at school where the majority of kids came together from an attached nursery and parents know each other as most have children in year 2. He befriended a boy who was fine at the beginning but became increasingly mean. The teacher explained that the boy is very popular and is trying to stop my son from monopolising his time as he wants to play with other kids. I am concerned as put downs progressed to the boy saying that my son's reading was poor. He doesn't include my son in games and ignores him completely. We tried explaining again and again that friendship needs to be reciprocated, that if somebody is mean you have to move on but my son seems to be completely focused on getting back with this boy. I stopped offering solutions, I just empathise saying "it's really hurtful when people ignore you" etc., but it's not working. My son who was very happy to read is not saying he is rubbish and resisting doing it. What else can I do? If it's relevant: my son has friends outside of his school, some of them he's known for more than 2 years and they started as his friends not me being friends with their mums.

QueenOfBrian Sun 11-Jan-15 09:24:45

It's an awful situation to be in as a parent.
I'm not sure if it's bullying if your ds is only Making a bee line for this other child who doesn't want be friends(I agree other child sounds pretty mean tho) But if the other child is trying to stop your ds from starting a friendship with the other children by taking them away from him, then I think you should speak to the school. Also if you haven't already could you invite other children over for tea?

whereismagic Sun 11-Jan-15 09:52:07

Additional complication is that this boy is the leader so if he doesn't want to include you you are excluded from any boys' activity. We had 4 boys from DS's class over. DS has a play date with one of them next week and hopefully another one will invite him over soon. 2/3 of the class are girls so DS doesn't have many boys to choose from.

Quitethewoodsman Sun 11-Jan-15 10:00:01

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

QueenOfBrian Sun 11-Jan-15 10:13:48

Well see how these playdates go. Hopefully the other boys will include your ds without this other boys authority, after getting to know him. Could be worth bring it up with school again especially if anything else upsetting is said to your ds by the other 'leader' boy. If their are only a small number of boys in the class then the School should atleast try to
address The issue. So it can be nipped in the bud now.

Someone else might come along with some other suggestions too, hopefully

whereismagic Sun 11-Jan-15 11:39:25

Well, I think I will chat to his teacher again just to get some idea what (if anything) they are doing. We will also work on his reading level and maths so I can transfer him for year 1 if it won't work out.

whereismagic Sun 11-Jan-15 11:40:09

And thank you for responding. It's very difficult to watch your child hurting even if he plays some part in it.

QueenOfBrian Sun 11-Jan-15 11:55:38

Good luck, I hope it gets sorted flowers

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: