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Daughter bullied by PTA Member.

(8 Posts)
Tarley Mon 13-Oct-14 17:33:14

My 10 year old was berated by a PTA just before summer break, she accused my daughter of bullying her child and when my daughter denied this was called a terrible name. The woman screamed abuse and jabbed her car keys at my child's face before I stepped in. I reported to the head teacher and chair of governors and all they have done is "had a word" with this woman.
The bullying allegations investigated and I was told off record that my daughter was in the clear as a child had come forward to say they had made it up. At no stage has myself or my daughter had an apology, the governor has refused to bring it up at any meetings as she says PTA is voluntary therefore she cannot be asked to step down, rather we should contact the police ! As if they have nothing better to do.
Now whenever there is a PTA event (weekly) my daughter is too intimidated to attend, discos, fetes, tuck shop etc.
it has had a catastrophic effect on her confidence, no longer wants to go to school. On her first day back in the new term she arrived to see her head teacher laughing and chatting with said woman at the school gates.
Any advice would be appreciated, I feel as though all the hard work and excellent behaviour my child has produced is being thrown away.

ArkhamOffett Mon 13-Oct-14 17:44:25

Request a meeting with the HEad and Chair Of Governors. The allegations of bullying being withdrawn should be on record and a timeline of events kept by yourself and the school.
Contact your LEA for advice on where to take this if the Governing Body won't take it seriously.

henless Mon 13-Oct-14 18:05:37

I don't know the ins and outs of the situation, but it seems that the word 'bullying' is being used a bit too freely.

The child's mum 'had a go' at your daughter. Of course it's wrong to shout at children but - if she shouted at / jabbed her keys at your child once - she is not 'bullying' your daughter. Bullying is a sustained, ongoing situation. She behaved badly.

Maybe you could look at taking a bit of heat out of the situation?

Are the children in the same class? How are things between them now? Perhaps the best way to help your DD is to have a quiet chat with the children's class teacher and ask how they're getting on, if s/he has noticed any incidents of bullying, whether s/he thinks your DD is a bully.

If s/he doesn't think your DD is bullying or has bullied the other child, then ask your class teacher to talk to your DD about it and explain to her that no-one thinks she's a bully.

Besides the fact that the other mother is at a lot of school events (as are lots of parents), I don't understand why her being a PTA member has anything to do with the situation.

Coolas Mon 13-Oct-14 18:17:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Coolas Mon 13-Oct-14 18:18:58

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ArkhamOffett Mon 13-Oct-14 18:47:53

Schools do have a say in how parents behave, particularly if such behaviour takes place on school premises. I know of several cases where a parent has been warned that if they approach another child in an aggressive or intimidating manner then steps would be taken to prevent them from doing so on school premises.
The fact that a child is now scared to take part in school activities is cause for concern and it all needs to be documented officially.

Coolas Tue 14-Oct-14 13:02:17

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

NessaYork Sat 15-Nov-14 13:39:03

I agree with all of AkhamOffett's advice. I'd add that the PTA parent's behaviour is totally unacceptable.

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