advice for an unsettled baby needed please!(15 Posts)
Can anyone help a completely clueless new mummy?!
My 2 week old baby girl is taking formula very well in the mornings but is very unsettled during the afternoon and especially in the evenings, she seems to be really unhappy and is not really bringing up her wind properly during and after feeding. She will only then sleep if one of us rocks her and holds her but is very restless for a long time.
She is not screaming the place down so I'm not sure whether this is colic or just trapped wind, but either way, does anyone have any good tips for making her life a bit easier? I have tried all burping positions and rubbing her tummy etc but they don't seem to work.
thanks a million in advance.
it could be colic (does tend to be worse in evenings)
at that age there is nothing wrong with rocking her to sleep. she may just be trying to tell you that she wants to be close to you and held and feel secure and loved... so you're doing the right thing!
if it IS colic then you could try using bottles like dr browns which are supposed to reduce wind, or giving infacol before each feed.
i am also a very strong advocate orf osteopathy (cranial and normal) it has worked wonders for so many people i know (including myself and my ds) so would definitely recommend it!
Harriet, i agree with starlover, evenings tend to be a really unsettled time for young babies without there often being any defineable reason. its does pass honestly altho its really hard work whilst they are like that but you are doing the best thing by just holding her and letting her know you are there and reassuring her.
have you tried holding her in the arm position? Its where you lie them along your forearm tummy down, bottom by yr elbow and head by yr wrist IYSWIM.
I agree with starlover. Colic, cuddles, changing bottles, osteopathy, etc.
How frequently are you feeding her? If she's getting little and often in the evening, then that could also be causing her discomfort and you may find that stretching the gap bewteen evening feeds a little may help her.
Have you tried a dummy? Sucking often eases little babies' stomach pains, which is why they sometimes overfeed (vicious circle). Even if you dislike the dummy it's worth a try as you can limit the use to just the times that your dd needs it, and wean her off it in a month or two.
Are you managing to get rest and have some quiet time in the evening? Babies can sometimes pick up on their parents' tension and get distressed.
As for bringing up wind, if it doesn't come easily let it be and go change her nappy - you may find that she lets go a rasper when you pick her up again.
Don't worry about it, or let it get you down - it's early days yet, and she doesn't know whether she's coming or going yet - any more than you do!
ooh also another thought... sometimes a change of scenery can help.
if (like us) you find you spend most of the evening in one room and she is getting unsettled then try going into another room. maybe dim the lights in your (or her) room and just cuddling up with her in the quiet
Oops, sorry, Harriett. I didn't mean to imply that you don't know what you're doing - of course you do, you're her mum! I meant that you are probably still knackered, aching, cloud-9, hormones and all the rest...
we also used to take Ds out for a walk in the evenings, he would sleep and we would get a change of scene and some fresh air. The evenings are so nice at the mo you could even fit in a quick half and hour in yr local beer garden!! might help you persuade DH to go out...it used to work for me!!
thanks for the advice, I will try all of it!
We are feeding about every three to four hours, she takes about 100ml at each feed.
I have to admit I caved in and gave her a dummy this evening as she was still very sucky an hour after her teatime feed- she went crazy over it! I don't know whether it's such a good idea to give dummies though- am I on a slippery slope?
I think prettycandles has a good point about me being a bit stressed, we had such a horrible time getting her into the world that I feel really stressed every time she cries, maybe she picks up on this, the poor thing.
I was strongly anti-dummy, but gave ds one at about 3w, and, as you describe, he absolutely went for it. It made a huge difference to his comfort - and therefore also to ours. I only used it when he needed it. I think the slippery slope is when you give the baby the dummy because you need to - instead of cuddling, for example. At about 3m ds found his fingers and sucked them, so I weaned him off the dummy as I saw no point in him having a comforter that could get lost! It took about 2 easy weeks.
prettycandles, there was no offence taken at all, I am clueless!
and my favourite suggestion so far is the beer garden- but you can't give a baby booze... can you?
3-4h feeds sound fine. It's if the feeds are at less than 2-3h intervals that alarm bells ring. Are you using newborn teats? If she is sucky then the next size up may flow to quickly for her. How long does she take to finish a bottle? IIRC a good guide for bottlefed babies is that a bottle should take 20-30mins at this age. But I'm not hugely confident about that figure, as ds is nearly 5 now!
Oh yes, I love the beer-garden idea! I wish someone had suggested that to me...I was certainly far too clueless and stressed out to think of it myself.
we are using newborn teats, she sometimes takes 20 minutes to finish but it can go up to about 45 mins, especially in the evenings and night. does this have a significance?
I agree with what everyone has said but I thougt of mentioning another scenario, when DS was about that age he had an episode that he seemed like somebody was killing him! when we rang the maternity guard they asked us the usual questions and when none of them seem to be the cause they asked if the baby has been handled "too much" which he was (having my inlaws and my mother around he had been from one's arms to another's all day long). So they told us that the more that we moved him, changed positions, etc, the more unsettled he will become, unfortunately he was so wind up that the only option was to lay him in his push chair and rock him to sleep in it (althought they suggested to lay him in his cot and let him calm down -easier said than done-), so, once you know that all other posibility is discarded it may work to keep doing the same repetitive motion, in the same position until he falls asleep (be it a long walk, or continuosly patting her back, etc.)
If a baby gulps the milk down too quickly, or has to suck too hard, they can take it more air than they would otherwise, and get uncomfortable that way. But that doesn't seem to be the case here. I only ever used one sort of bottle (Avent), but others have said that changing bottle brands can help.
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