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i think baby is rejecting breast .... what would u do??

(10 Posts)
blossom2 Sun 07-Aug-05 21:10:19

DD2 is just 4 weeks old and we've been giving her a bottle for 1 feed a day (EBM) for about a week now. I've noticed that she is not sucking properly or latching on properly - is she starting to reject breast?? if so, should i go cold turkey to get her back on breast or start to express instead???

DD1 is 3.5 yrs and i'm not really enjoying breastfeeding but worry that i wont be able to express enough for her or have the time to express ...

any advice and your thoughts would be really appreciated ...

gigglinggoblin Sun 07-Aug-05 21:25:34

there is nothing wrong with bottle feeding, but there is a lot wrong with breastfeeding when you dont want to. only you know how you feel about that and you need to do whatever makes you happy. if you are happy, your baby will be happy.

as for expressing, everyone is different i think. i bf exclusively for 4 months but couldnt express anything. other mums express loads and hardly bf at all.

i got mastitis when ds2 was a few weeks old and my milk almost dried up totally, so he was mainly bottle fed. however i always managed a breastfeed when he woke up in the morning and it was the most magic time, we were very close but i didnt have to worry if he was being fed ok cos i knew he was having his bottles too. with ds1 i didnt want to bf so bottle fed, ds3 was the one i fed for 4 months, tho he only stopped completely at around age 1. you have to find whats right for you.

sorry thats a bit of a ramble about my life, not much help on whether or not she is rejecting your breast, you prob need to speak to hv/mw. good luck x

hunkermunker Sun 07-Aug-05 21:29:51

I would stop giving the bottle for a couple of days, see if you can sort her latch out and think about whether or not you want to keep breastfeeding - but give yourself time to make the decision while you're still doing it as if you go to bottles, then decide you wanted to bfeed, it may be hard to restart.

Why aren't you enjoying it?

blossom2 Sun 07-Aug-05 22:27:19

she seems not to be hungry today. although she did feed loads from the hours of 12-4pm, didn't take much at 7.00pm or at 10.00pm (from bottle or breast) so i'm concerned. she seems fine though, not temperature and calm.

there seems to be a period of a few hours everyday where she just seems to want to feed all the time and i find that hard to deal with, especially with a 3.5yr old. its good on weekends when DH is around to help but during the week, its really hard. also no routine to it all, and wanting to start one but with no outside help (live in paris and there is no one around to help)... so i just find it all really difficult to say the least.

hunkermunker Sun 07-Aug-05 22:34:06

The first six weeks are the hardest when establishing feeding - and even if she was bottlefed, there's no guarantee she'd fall into a routine.

Can DH take any time off over the next couple of weeks, just an extra day here and there would help you feel less overwhelmed with it all.

If you can, give it a couple of weeks and see if she settles into a more predictable routine.

mears Sun 07-Aug-05 23:13:35

I personally think that breastfeeding is made harder by trying to fit in expressing, especially at 4 weeks. I never gave EBM till I went back to work (13 weeks) and babes all took bottle with no problem. Personally I would forget expressing for the moment and just breastfeed. Bottle feeding does not mean that you would have a routine - you would have more hassle maikng up feeds and sterilising IMO. Breastfeeding becomes more enjoyable when you have a baby smiling at you - stick with it a bit longer

barmie Sun 07-Aug-05 23:50:50

I'm sorry to hear you're finding this a difficult time. The first few weeks and even months with a newborn are very demanding, and compounded when you have older children to take into consideration. My experience with my first was til she was 11 months (now 4.5), and am still BF my 17 month old. I'd agree with others that you need to decide whether you want to continue with BF. I resorted to putting on favourite cartoons, or reading books with the eldest whilst bf the baby. Your baby may be experiencing 'nipple confusion', where she hasn't yet established a feeding technique with either breast or bottle. Babies needs to learn different methods for feeding from a bottle and from the breast and at four weeks she may find it hard to decipher which is best suited to her needs. Also, your body may still be adjusting to bf in terms of regulating demand. If you want to continue bf it might be best to leave the bottles out of the picture for now, and when a regular feeding pattern is set in place then start to introduce the bottle again. Do you really need to express now? Your 3.5 year old might be able to 'help' during feed times (getting fresh breast pads, towels, cushions, etc) or respond to 'special' time either before or after you feed the baby so that she doesn't feel excluded. It does get easier with time and practice. Hope this helps.

berolina Mon 08-Aug-05 17:11:51

blossom, in paris there might well be an english speaking lll group/bf counsellors who might be able to visit and help you (with the bf, whether she is rejecting or not). the feeding all the time is normal.
maybe you could advertise in the city magazine for other english speaking mums who might have kids dd1 could play with occasionally, or a student who could help you around the house in return for practising her english on you?

berolina Mon 08-Aug-05 17:17:02

english speaking lll leaders in paris

loupylou Mon 08-Aug-05 22:20:05

You have to go with the way you feel most comfortable, happy mum=happy baby. It may be worth re looking at your positioning, try starting again, get comfortable and then lift baby to you, nose to nipple, tummy to mummy. think about how you'd like to be to drink a nice cold drink on a hot day andmake sure baby can get their head into that position. Have you tried lying down, or the rugby ball hold, with baby facing the other way. It depends what space you have and what you find comfortable. Could you collect bm in breast shells, whilst feeding? Approach your local NCT or Le Leche League about hiring different pumps, If you are going to keep feeding, then try expressing from the other breats whilst feeding then if you change your mind, you could have built up a supply.

Hope some of this gives you some ideas, best wishes

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