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When did you stop breastfeeeding, and why?

(19 Posts)
dabihp Mon 27-Jun-05 16:02:56

Dd is nearly 4 weeks old, have been combined feeding, but am going to fully formula feed.
Reasons for doign this are...

Had c-section, dd is now about 10.7 llbs and i find it quite unconfortable on my wound area to hold her for so long, and to sit for so long...

feed were takign forever, adn I was gettign distressed and not enjoying it anymore

want to give more attention to dd1(2.5yrs) which I felt I couldnt do, whilst feeding for hours on end...

dp can help out with feeds now

Feel full of guilt/relief about stopping bf, so guess I just want others input into when and why you stopped...

misdee Mon 27-Jun-05 16:05:22

with dd1 i was advised to firmual feed as 'my moilk wasnt enough' . had no support from midwives or HV.

dd2 was ebcause she was exhausting me. she was feeding evrey 2 hours day and night at 8-10 weeks. i was just too tired.

dd3, i havent yet.

flamesparrow Mon 27-Jun-05 16:06:22

PLEASE don't feel guilt.

This is YOUR child, and YOUR choice. If you aren't happy doing it, then don't do it.

All the numbers for how early or late others stopped won't change anything.

I truly believe that a baby will thrive more on formula with a happy mother, than on breastmilk with an anxious one.


(Oh, and if you are still wanting to know... 12 weeks.)

misdee Mon 27-Jun-05 16:07:35

dabhip, was it you in WGC?

dabihp Mon 27-Jun-05 16:14:40

WGC?? whats that?

misdee Mon 27-Jun-05 16:16:59

welwyn garden city, i know there was amnetter here who was lving here as well.

sweetkitty Mon 27-Jun-05 16:17:37

Winding down now to fully stopped by a year. My reasons are pregnant with no2 and feeling knackered and wanting a few months break before no2 arrives. Still feel really guilty about it though yet on the other hand most friends/family think I'm a bit weird for still feeding at nearly a year.

I think you feel you can't win no matter what you do...

whiteriver Mon 27-Jun-05 16:25:51

It's lovely to be able to breast feed. I fed sg for 7 months solidly then half me half formula until 10 months, i was losing so much weight and feeling shattered. Pregnant with 2nd now and hope to go as long as I can but i refuse to feel guilty if it doesn't work out. i agree with flamesparrow

sazhig Mon 27-Jun-05 23:57:18

Please feel free to tell me to butt out if I am saying the wrong things here but if you are feeling guilty about stopping bf, could you not change a few things to allow you to continue. For example:
Have you tried a different feeding position so your LO is not resting on your scar? Lying down or rugby/football hold maybe?
Could you use feeding time to spend some quality quiet time with your dd1 like reading with her?
Your DP could also spend some quality time with your elder dd to allow you to feed your little one.

One other thought - at nearly 4 weeks your LO is likely to have gone through and/or about to start a growth spurt and they can make you feel like you are doing nothing but feeding. This is perfectly normal & will pass. Once you get through the early weeks it does get easier, your LO will become more efficient at feeding, and you will soon have much more time to spend with your elder dd.

Here are some links you may find useful to read about the things I have mentioned:
Tips for juggling a newborn & toddler
nursing postions
Growth Spurts
Please ask if you would like more information about any of this
Kind regards

hunkermunker Tue 28-Jun-05 00:01:14

Would agree with sazhig and say to explore your choice to stop or to continue fully so that you are 100% happy with it. Not trying to pressure you into continuing to bfeed, just want you to be totally sure that you're happy with your decision, because from your first post it sounds like you may not be (tell me to butt out if you are though!).

lucy5 Tue 28-Jun-05 00:04:00

At about 17 months, dd just stopped one day!

Fran1 Tue 28-Jun-05 00:04:04

Deliberately havn't answered this before now because i assumed you wanted to hear people giving up quickly to help you not feel guilt.

Now i wonder if you're not very confident in your decision?

If this is the case, i'll let you know that bf gets far easier, you're still in the frequent feeding days when it seems like your are a milking cow. This quickly gets less and less from now onwards and its great that your dd takes bottles also so you can get nights out to yourself etc.

Of course if you know you want to give up bf then you don't need to feel any guilt at all. Just look at what a beautiful being your body has produced and continued nourishing for these 4 weeks. Give yourself a pat on the back and enjoy her! no guilt required.

Word of warning, give up slowly otherwise the boobs get very painful and can cause probs. Even if you just hand express a little every now and then it will help.

flamesparrow Tue 28-Jun-05 08:15:47

Ooh, and one more bit of advice here for if you do decide you might not be quite ready yet...

Don't think "I'll feed until 6 weeks" etc, think "I'll breastfeed today, and see how it goes, I can always stop tomorrow". It makes the whole task much less daunting.

Goodl uck.

Littlefish Tue 28-Jun-05 09:16:42

Hi Dabihp

I completely understand and sympathise with your situation. I am very pro-breastfeeding and was sure I would breastfeed my dd until she was at least 6 months. When it came to it, I managed to breasfeed my dd for 4 weeks until a combination of infected nipples, mastitis in the whole breast, and then blistered nipples made me make the decition to stop. I spoke to my GP and unfortunately received inaccurate advice about whether I could continue feeding on one breast, or stop for a couple of days etc. I WISH I had known HOW to ask for help. I felt so desparate and guilty that I wasn't enjoying feeding my dd, but I was in so much pain that I was starting to resent her.

I stopped very suddenly and although I felt some initial relief about stopping, my feelings of guilt still continue.

This is not meant to try and give you any answers, I just wanted to try and explain where I went wrong. It's down to you and how you feel - either, draw on every piece of good advice here, try to get support from NCT breastfeeding counsellors, La Leche, midwives etc and continue breastfeeding for as long as you want. (Find out about mixing breast and bottle feeding - I have a friend who did this very successfully for 4 months). Or, stop breastfeeding because it is the right decision for you and you are completely sure.

Flamesparrow is so right in her comments. I could only see the pain of breastfeeding stretching ahead of me for the whole 6 months, rather than being able to take it a day at a time.

If you do decide to stop, be sure and be confident in the fact that you will have given your baby the best start possible and move on without feeling guilty.

I wish I could take my own advice! I still feel a sense of loss when I see other women breastfeeding their children and am absolutely determined that next time I will get it right, because I know who and how to ask.

Strangely, now I'm weaning my dd I am starting to feel better. I spend hours preparing delicious, nutritious food for her, and am really enjoying nurturing her again.

Sorry if this hijacks the thread at all, it's not meant to but it just touched a really raw nerve with me.

Littlefish Tue 28-Jun-05 09:18:35

Just realised how awful my last message sounds. I'm not trying to make anyone feel guilty - that was just my experience.

I had 2 friends who gave up around the same time as me and they have always been fine about their decision. I suppose it just depends on the individual and their own expectations.

Chuffed Tue 28-Jun-05 11:18:49

I lasted till 10mths but really considered giving up at about the same time. It is awful being confined to the couch hardly being able to do anything day in, day out because all the little one is doing is feeding...It does get better.
Personally I would give it another 3wks. At 6wks my dd just suddenly seemed to get it. I did formula feed at the dream feed as I was just exhausted and empty and try lying down on your side it is a great position for bf.

Gobbledigook Tue 28-Jun-05 12:03:06

Breastfed ds1 for about a month. Reasons for giving up:

It was hell on earth! So, so painful - tried breast shells, nipple shields, savoy cabbage....I'd be in tears by the end of every feed. I hated it.

I dreaded every feed which seemed to come round far too frequently.

He was a crap, crap feeder and I couldn't tell how much he was getting. I was leaking all over the place even a month on - I had to sleep on a towel.

I was not comfortable feeding in front of others so I was always up in the bedroom while everyone else chatted.

All the responsibility for feeding was mine - with bottles dh got up in the night too.

Selfish I know, but I wanted 'my body back' - sick of big horrible bras and feeling lardy.

The upshot of all of the above was that I was becoming depressed and not enjoying early motherhood at all.

I felt wracked with guilt while trying to make the decision but felt 10 stone lighter once it was made. So relieved.

mandyc66 Tue 28-Jun-05 12:27:19

Brast fed them all till they gave up, which was unfortunately about 9 months old! Ds 4 is still having a suck for bed and a quick one on a morning. if he wakes in the night he gets one too. he is just 9 months

flamesparrow Tue 28-Jun-05 12:32:09

Gobbledigook - One of the reasons I stopped was cos it was summer and I wanted to be able to wear little tops again, and I couldn't in feeding bras!

I was hot and uncomfortable. It wasn't the only factor, but if I am honest, it was one of them

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