BF problem in a 1 year old - somewhat urgent

[IlanaK]

My ds2 is almost a year old and is feeding three times a day - morning, afternoon and evening. He takes a big feed in the morning, but I am really struggling to get him to feed at the other two times. If we are out, there is no way. He bites me if I even try to latch him on. Even at home, its hit and miss. More and more he just bites me. He really seems to not want to wait for the milk to let down. If I can get him to suckle long enough for let down, then he will feed for a short while. Could he possibly be self weaning at this age? I thought this was very unlikely from what I have read. My first weaned at the same age, but it was my choice. He was not bothered by it - we did routines with him (yes, I know - slapped wrist) and cut feeds out one at a time early on. But with ds2, we have not done this. He seems to be doing all of this himself. I dread feeding times at the moment and am getting sore from the biting. Any ideas or suggestions would be gratefully received! I am off on holiday tomorow and don't want to be facing problems there.

[starlover]

if you dread feeding times and he is losing interest then why don't you drop the feeds?
just stick to the morning one?
i don't know as i have never been in the situation, and wouldn't want to tell you to stop if you actually want to carry on... but it seems silly to struggle if you would both be happier not doing it

[motherinferior]

I think he's self-weaning, honey, from the sound of it.

[WigWamBam]

Yes, it sounds like he's self-weaning to me, too. If he's ready to start dropping feeds then there's nothing you can do about it really.

[IlanaK]

I am really not ready to wean. I thought we would be able to keep going until around two years old as he seems so much more attached to me than his brother was. On the otherhand, I am sitting here with a really sore nopple from the biting he has been doing.

If I just feed him in the mornings, will my supply keep enough for him? (I should know this as I am a trainee bf counsellor, but it all feels so different when it is your own!)

[starlover]

i would imagine so... you might feel a bit full from dropping the other feeds... and then your supply will just regulate itself.

[saadia]

Have you tried using nipple shields?

[IlanaK]

I am not sure what using nipple sheilds would do. If he does not want to feed, he is even less likely to latch on if I start using those.

[BadgerBadger]

If he's self weaning unfortunately there's little you can do (I say unfortunately because I do know how upsetting it can be when they are ready to before you are!)

I would say to let him drop the feeds he no longer wants. It is much better to let feeding slip away happily that engage in a futile and upsetting battle.

For as long as he wants one feed per day, your body will continue to provide that. Another thing to keep in mind is that though he may want to finish all feeds soon, many children (I know several) continue to want one particular feed for months, despite dropping all others.

You mentioned your closeness with him . Maybe make time for extra special cuddles without offering the breast (and so a battle). I know it's tempting to offer, but at a year old, he's well able to let you know what he wants and when (well, when it comes to breastmilk anyway!)

HTH

[oops]

Message withdrawn

[bobbybob]

My ds has gone through periods of dropping feeds, and for a one year old with a balanced diet it's not really an problem. Recently he has had a big language spurt and has gone back up to needing 3 feeds.

If you don't want to think of him weaning, just think of him having a rest from those other 2 feeds until he wants to restart them. There is a lot of other stuff going on for him right now - he will let you know when he wants to come back.

[AussieSim]

I BF'd till 16 months, going from 3 feeds to none in the last month - I only stopped because my DH was treating me to a trip to the USA to visit my best friend. DS was always a good feeder and we both enjoyed it but he honestly didn't seem to care less when the BFing stopped and as I didn't become hugely engorged or antyhing either than I think he wasn't even taking that much of it in, it was just a part of his routine I guess. I was a little heartbroken about it at the time and am now looking forward to BFing DS2 who is due in 4weeks.