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Another guilty mother worrying over the darned breast(23 Posts)
Hi, my dd is 6 weeks old, I exclusively bf her until 5 weeks old then i introduced a bottle of hipp organic at bedtime so that dad could feed her I use hipp because expressing is not my thing, it hurts and only a trickle comes out after at least one hour of hard labour.
Bfing is not difficult for me, I dont mind it at all and I know baby's getting the best but as she's getting older I'm pretty sure that she IS NOT getting enough, I know what i need to do to increase my milk supply but sitting about topless in bed / having her attached via nipple for 24 hours of the day is not a viable option for me.
I also dont like having to find a naughty mothers corner when i'm out just to feed her! Or I run the gaunlet of facing the disgusted peering buffoons when I dont bother find the naughty mum's corner.
So basically, I now want to switch to Hipp altogether, bfing perhaps first thing and last thing of the day. But I'm riddled with guilt, does 6 weeks of bfing actually make it worthwhile?! I'm torn between what I think is best for my baby and whats easier for me
Do what you think best.
I found b/f got easier as child fed more quickly as she got older & less often. I fed wherever I was & had no probs. Also think bottle sterilising/cooling/heating seemed such a faff, especially in the night or when out on a hot day.
Try and stick with it a bit longer as it is so good for them. You'll soon find that you drop more and more feeds and by the time they are six months they only need 3 feeds a day. At first I know it feels like you are feeding them all the time but that soon passes. However, if you really want to reduce it to 2 feeds a day, don't feel guilty. The more breastmilk they get the better so of course 6 weeks is worthwhile!
My immediate reaction is, you've done the hard bit i.e. getting breastfeeding established - why stop now?
Because I do think that if you go down to only two breastfeeds a day at this stage you will very soon find that you don't have enough milk to keep it up for long.
But it's such a personal decision, I don't think anyone on here can really tell you what to do. All they can do is tell you what they would do in your shoes. And in your shoes I would carry on breastfeeding.
If you think you'll feel guilty about stopping, don't put yourself through that. Why are you sure she's not getting enough? She may very well be going through a growth spurt, and settle in a day or so.
Also, you don't need to find a naughty mother's corner - if you're worried about anyone seeing anything, drape a pashmina or scarf strategically, but otherwise, most people don't even know you're feeding unless they come over to say hello to the baby you're "cuddling"
always do what you heart tells you. you have given her a good start with the closrum alone. i am very pro bf but not if mum is doing it because of peer pressure.
Do you actually feed in public atm? Because I've fed ds and dd all over an only once had anything that could be remotely be descibed as a negative reaction and that only two old bats who moved to another table at a cafe while muttering. Silly hags.
Other than that (and I must have fed hundreds of times) nada, nothing, zilch.
Why do you think she is not getting enough?
Do you think you might just be having one of those crap days of early motherhood where you feel absolutely on-call and not a second of the day to call your own? I do know how you feel if so, but I don't honestly think that switching from breastfeeding will make a huge difference to that.
Thanks for your posts,
I guess I'm feeling a little tired with being the on-call feeding system but I do also believe that she's not getting enough, its just my personal intuition.
I was kind of hoping you'd all say dont worry Tamula, give up, its no problem we all totally agree, thus removing all guilt. You MNetters are a right bunch of do-gooders!!! But your all very right and I know deep down that I want to continue but I am finding it a bit of a drag for the reasons already stated.
Oh, I get fed up with being the feeding system sometimes too! I will hand over both kids to dh and just be busy when she'll need feeding again. 99 times it will be fine, but every so often I do think 'oh, gerrof me!". But that's life, I think. I sometimes feel exactly the same way about my ds who just wants ask me questions ALL the time, absolutely non-stop without pausing for breath... aargh!
About that intuition....could it be a crisis of confidence? I read once that even in countries where there is no bottle feeding to speak of (ie developing countries) women still fret endlessly about their milk supply.
If the baby is growing, you have enough!
yes of course it makes it worthwhile
over 95% of antibodieas are transmitted to baby through colostrum
you've done a great job, quite worrying and go for the formula if you want to
is your buba gaining weight? is she wee-ing/pooing regularly? speak to the HV if you think she isnt getting enough, but i bet she is. around this time dd3 feeds went from 30-45mins each time to 15-20mins. she just became more effective at feeding.
Hey Tamula, sorry to here that you are having such a hard time.
Pop in to our March thread some time we are all missing you and have been wondering how you were doing. Also some interesting things happening at the moment.
We would really like to here from you.
Mud - can you explain that bit about 95 per cent of antibodies in colostrum???? I think you may have misunderstood something
Tamula - nothing you've said makes it clear you have to stop unless you actually want to. Intuition telling you you don't have enough....what's that all about, then?
Hi Tamula - my DD (now 11 weeks) feeds only 5-10 minutes at a time from both breasts. The most she's gone is 15-20 minutes. I was convinced she wasn't getting enough. In moments of doubt, still present, I think she's not getting enough. I periodically avoid BF-type discussions so I don't get depressed about it all. But I plan to stick to it.
Feeding in public - haven't had any negative reactions yet. I don't do it ostentatiously but do it if I need to. Because I'm still a beginner I focus on DD and don't look up to see if anyone is disapproving.
Good luck whatever you decide. I'd keep going, you're over the hard bit now.
Not sure about 6 months but DD2 did from 7 months when I returned to work.
yeah I mean, it depends on how well they are eating their solids but they start to need less and less milk and physiologically they only need 3 milk feeds a day from 6 to 12 months but whether this happens or not is another matter.
sorry, I'm new to this - what does dd and ds stand for??!
Tamula, hello. Here's my pennyworth.
I started mix-feeding DS at 5 wks. I was having a miserable time BFing, and had resolved not to put myself through the 4-mth misery I'd had with DD while exclusively BFing. I also, honestly, felt so grim about BFing that I could not wait for the 6-wk mark, though I knew I should keep exclusively BFing for another week if I wanted to establish supply.
I did worry about this, made them very long feeds at first -- but still felt a great weight lifted off me when I cut down.
Anyway, DS is now around the 4-mth mark, I'm still doing 3 BFs a day, supply seems fine, I'm pretty much enjoying the remaining BFs, and I have no real regrets.
You've done soooo well to get to Wk 6. Everyone is right, it gets loads easier from now on, feeds get snappier and more efficient, but you may be one of these people (like me) who is happier in the middle ground
How about gradually reducing her breastfeeds and replacing with formula feeds-over the course of say a few weeks (thats if you want to go down that route) that way, if you dont like it and you want to go back to exclusively breastfeeding it wont be too hard to get your milk supply back up.
I think once you have done that you'll know what suits you best
So sorry to hear this Tamula - I had lots of problesm with DS1 like this and ended up giving him a "starter" of breast milk every time and then he had a bottle. I was really distraught and wondered if it would be beneficial but it is! Any breast milk is better than none.
Having said that, DS2 fed like a dream and certainly by 8 weeks it was so much easier (as lots of others have said) and I fed him anywhere and ignored people's stares.
Good luck whatever you do
Thanks again for your posts, I think I will continue b/f for a while longer and just be more confident when feeding outside of the home. I'll still keep up my formula feed at bedtime though.
Your posts have been very beneficial thanks so much.
Hi tamula - I just wanted to reiterate that your baby is probably going througha growth spurt. Between 6 and 8 weeks tends to be a prime time for constant feeding - formula or breast-fed. I'm sure your baby is getting enough milk from you (if she is still gaining weight and having wet nappies) but I know it can be hard to believe that when you don't actually see how much they consume.
For me personally, it started to get much easier after 8 weeks and then 12 weeks. Good luck with whatever you decide.
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