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8mo old (nearly) DS not BFing much in the day and then up all night feeding. At the end of my tether and struggling to stay motivated with BFing.

(18 Posts)
LackaDAISYcal Tue 16-Jun-09 18:53:27

....which is a Big Deal to me as I'm a peer supporter and hope to start my BFC training in the autumn sad

DS is only having a feed at breakfast and then again very late afternoon. He feeds for about ten minutes each of these times.

He then has a big feed before bed at 7ish and can be up three or four times in the night....or sometimes five or six hmm

He gets to the point in the day where he shows all the signs of wanting a feed, throwing himself back and nuzzling in, but as soon as I get my boob out he shakes his head No, nuzzles underneath my boob and just lies there, latches on and is off again seconds later shouting the odds at me or else gets distracted by any tiny noise around us.

By the time he does feed late afternoon he is beside himself and it takes me ages to get him calm enough to latch on.

I don't remember my DD doing this at all, but then again she was a good sleeper and was going 11 til 7 from somewhere around ten weeks old. questions are:

Is the night feeding likely to affect the amount of milk he needs in the day?

At the very least I'd expect him to want a drink in the day as he eats three "meals" plus fruit I perhaps giving him too much solid food? He can eat a whole weetabix for breakfast.

Is there any way I can get him to cut down on the night feeds without causing too much distress? I hate the idea of controlled crying.

I know night feeding is normal still at this age, but I have other children to look after and am at the stage where I just can't be up half the night and still function the next day. My poor DH is also suffering from his waking up and has been in trouble at work for falling asleep at his desk and nodding off in a meeting!

But, it seems to be getting worse, not better at night but I don't know how to break this cycle that we seem to have got ourselves into. I'm even thinking that if I gave him bottles during the day he would be more likely to take them as he could still see what's going on whilst drinking them. But I don't want to give up BFing.

I'm also concerned about my supply as the last week I've noticed that he is a lot fussier on the boob at the bedtime feed and gets cross as it doesn't seem to come quick enough for him and that where before I did single sided feeding I now need to give both boobs.

If you've got this far, thanks for reading and any advice very, very gratefully received smile

ilovemydogandmrobama Tue 16-Jun-09 19:11:34

Daisy, no advice, but it sounds to me as if he's thirsty. I don't know how a b/f baby older than 6 months regulates thirst, but could possibly explain why he's wanting to feed more since it's been hotter?

sleeplessinstretford Tue 16-Jun-09 19:20:39

Daisy, my dd2 went a bit mental with feeds during the day just before my periods came back (about 7 months old) she also cut her first tooth around that time as well.she fed at night (possibly because she was half asleep and didn't realise)after that we had similar 'nursing strikes' every month- it's not that is it? I don't know any reason why it might be but you never know?

LackaDAISYcal Tue 16-Jun-09 19:51:35

oooh, I was ovulating last week and due on next week so maybe something in that, although my periods came back when he was about 19 weeks and I haven't noticed a pattern so far. I'll keep an eye on it though.

If he were thirsty ILMD would he not want to have more feeds in the day, not less? I'm very blody confused by him. He is DC3 and the hardest to read of all my DC; I have had no clue to what he wants from him being a few hours old and feel like I'm just winging it most of the time and almost as if he is my first one again; odd little conundrum that he is. He is a happy little soul though with a really sweet nature.

LackaDAISYcal Tue 16-Jun-09 21:12:16


fishie Tue 16-Jun-09 21:20:02

ds slowed down on night feeds at 9m.

do you think it could be teeth or some other discomfort - growth spurt? i made water available at all times, has he got that?

MamaG Tue 16-Jun-09 21:30:34

sorry to hear that you're struggling daisy - I was thinking about this today: BabyG is having 2, maybe 3 feeds a day but then feeding on and off at night a bit more! As you know, he's similiar age to your DS so I'll lurk too

nicewarmslippers Tue 16-Jun-09 21:40:15

I feel exactly the same! My ds is 8 months, just posted about his biteing problem but could also have written your post about night issues. He feeds so well and easily at night but I have had enough (though also haven't-don't want to stop breastfeeding and feel night feeds are what is keeping supply going.

no advice just sympathy.

I guess one thing-sometiems it helps to remmeber what a small period of life this is and how you will look back so fondly at his lovely breastfeeding face presed up against your booby with his sleepy eyes.....
doesn't help in any practical sense though!

LackaDAISYcal Tue 16-Jun-09 21:48:59

He might be teething; he's dribbly but no other symptoms.

Never thought about offering water, do BF babies need water?

I think part of the problem is he is right next to me so when he wakes he wants feeding back to sleep....but we can't move him in with his sister until she learns to go to sleep at night in her bed. She was in it but then started getting up and playing/shouting/crying/carrying on till silly o'clock so is back in the cot that was earmarked for DS.


MamaG Tue 16-Jun-09 21:53:24

I'm the same daisy - i think BabyG smells me in the night and its now automatic for him to root about for the milk at night, more of a snuggling up thing than a hungry thing

LackaDAISYcal Tue 16-Jun-09 21:55:27

My DD was a biter nicewarmslippers (great name grin) so I have buckets of empathy with you over that.

I don't want to give up BFing either but the constant fighting with him over feeds in the day (not to mention the embarassment of trying to feed him in public as he growls and shakes his head and exposes my rather attractive hmm norks to all and sundry) combined with the lack of sleep plus demanding, regressive two year old and stroppy, gobby seven year old with a bit of PND thrown in and I am on my knees sad

I realise that giving formula won't make him sleep, but at least DH could share to load a

LackaDAISYcal Tue 16-Jun-09 21:59:20

oops not sure what happened there....

"share the load" that was meant to say.

that's why I want him in his own (sort of) room MamaG; if he can't smell me he might not stir whe he has his wakeful periods....some nights it's literally every 45mins shock

He sleeps well in the early part of the night and only starts waking at anything from 11ish to 1ish....once I'm in bed beside him.

LackaDAISYcal Tue 16-Jun-09 22:01:54

oh, and for nice, warm and fuzzy BFing moment....check out the 2nd photo on my profile <melts>

nicewarmslippers Tue 16-Jun-09 22:25:01

bf babes definitely need water i think once they are on solids, especially in this hot weather. ds 8 months) is gulping it back
one hand typing-expressing

LackaDAISYcal Tue 16-Jun-09 22:32:58

I was sure that they get all the liquid they need from BM (which is nearly 90% water anyway) and that too much water can fill them up?

Would offering water at night, when this is the only time he is feeding, not have the effect of making things worse? especially where maintaining my supply is concerned? And would offering water in the day encourage him to feed less rather than more?


MamaG Tue 16-Jun-09 22:55:25

That photo is beautiful. It really is.

I don't give BabyG any water to drink - I tried but he doesn't like it. I just give him BM and yoghurts and fruit - he's not dehydrated at all.

LackaDAISYcal Tue 16-Jun-09 22:59:21

ta smile, it's one of my favourite photos of him.

Did you get my email earlier? something went wonky with my pooter as I was sending it, I think the photos were too big maybe, but it says it sent it. for my nightly sleep torture session wink

MamaG Tue 16-Jun-09 23:26:51

Yes I got your email and have replied - I couldn't open it earlier as DH was up and I can't let him see pushchairs on the screen grin

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