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Breastfeeding and sex

(16 Posts)
Rainbear Thu 26-Feb-09 14:20:21

So if you happen to be one of those women who are left without a trace of sex drive while bfing... what happens if you want to feed them for a few years? That's gotta be a sure marriage killer? And THEN you want to have another baby? I'm beginning to understand why it's such a cliche for men to have mistresses. Any advice out there? Does it get better at any point?

AccidentalMum Thu 26-Feb-09 14:22:05

How old is baby? IME, a lot of the obvious hormonal influence of BFing tailed off after about 8/9 months, poss earlier if you drop feeds quicker than we did.

CherryChoc Thu 26-Feb-09 14:26:53

Don't have any advice I'm afraid, just wanted to let you know you're not the only one going through this at the moment. (Not helped by having a DP with the sex drive of a horny teenager hmm)

I am hoping that once baby is on solids and I start dropping feeds it will get better.

SydneyB Thu 26-Feb-09 14:31:13

Not sure what happens longer term but I was completely off sex until I stopped bf DD at 6 months and same again this time, DS 4.5 mths! Poor DH... although hard to know whether its the bf or total and utter sleep deprivation killing libido.

Rainbear Thu 26-Feb-09 15:08:19

Baby 10 months but he doesn't eat much food and I get the feeling he's going to be a milky baby for a while, but we'll see. Yes indeed the sleep deprevation is a big culprit i'm sure and the lack of any time alone together. I'm quite happy in my baby bubble but partner not so impressed!

Grendle Thu 26-Feb-09 15:10:06

My sex drive returned after about 9 months each time. I've been breastfeeding for 3 years 10 months now, and managed to conceive a second child during that time. Things improved even further each time once my periods were back.

The tiredness of motherhood is still a killer at times though!

lottiebunny Thu 26-Feb-09 15:39:58

Maybe thats why bf works as a contraceptive wink

AnnVan Thu 26-Feb-09 16:12:48

well my sex drive returned about 8 weeks after birth. Problem now is finding the time/opportunity/energy.

MamacitaGordita Thu 26-Feb-09 16:13:31

LOL at lottiebunny

I think it's a lot to do with sleep deprivation as well. Pregnancy made me oh so amorous (DH was in heaven and latterly could not keep up!) so he's had his quota for a good while!! grin

Alas now...

LeonieSoSleepy Thu 26-Feb-09 17:41:43

Message withdrawn

Ginni Thu 26-Feb-09 20:45:41

no sign of sex drive here after 9 weeks breastfeeding. I was v. horny during pregnancy and dp wasn't interested in the slightest, now it's roles reversed, neither situation great for our relationship, ho hum.

Ginni Thu 26-Feb-09 20:45:42

no sign of sex drive here after 9 weeks breastfeeding. I was v. horny during pregnancy and dp wasn't interested in the slightest, now it's roles reversed, neither situation great for our relationship, ho hum.

Sullwah Thu 26-Feb-09 21:18:35

I wonder how much of a reason this if for people to give up bf and move to ff?

MamaHobgoblin Thu 26-Feb-09 22:06:18

Libido pretty fugitive since about 30 weeks pregnant, and DS is now a year old. sad But can't tell if it's tiredness or the bf hormones! BF does make you, um, dry as the proverbial bone, though. Which makes the sex thing, on the rare occasions we get round to it, all icky because of using lube. blushBleah.

FairMidden Thu 26-Feb-09 22:10:46

I blame the tiredness because when I'm not knakcered (rare ocasions!) I might well be in the mood. I also still get the ovulation horn midway through my cycle. But mostly I am tired, tired, tired. BF doesn't seem to come into it for me.

Mumnnanny Thu 26-Feb-09 23:21:55

I can tell you that as long as you breastfeed..the dripping will carry on. Sex stimulates the hormones and therefore you produce milk more. I had to wear a bra and pads throughout sex and it still didnt help as I leaked that much I was soaked through.

And when you have a partner that is so sex driven its hard to keep the positions calm and so my boobs used to fly about and drip all over him...NoT SeXy!

Don't let this make you stop feeding your baby. Get a sexy corset or lace nightie with bra fitted and stuff with breast pads. Sorry...not funny, but it works.

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