please help, getting disheartened..(18 Posts)
DS is 7 1/2 weeks and breastfed. All was going fine until last 2 weeks when he has started taking less at each feed so consequently feeding more often. He latches great, sucks well and swallows for 10mins then off, thats it. I try winding, having a break, cajooling everything. he will sometimes be persuaded to have a few more sucks but nothing substantial. Alot of the time he fights if i try to get him to have more and I feel like I'm trying to choke him. He is content then only for 1 to 2 hours altho will very occasionally go a bit longer if asleep. Fortunately overnight he is better dont know why. We tried a bottle of EBM tonight and same story. he has taken 2 1/2 oz only. Thats nowhere near enough at 7 weeks is it? Any ideas on how I can get him to accept more gratefully received. I am starting to dread going out as he always needs a feed mid shop/journey etc. Just read the baby whisperer and her idea of a 40min breastfeed each time has made me feel completely inadequate. What am I doing wrong??
Don't go by the time. Both my DSs were finished in under 15 mintues at each feed. ou need to go by how contented your baby is and how his weight is going. I don't think you can really judge by bow much he takes from a bottle either.
I can't really offer help but didn't want you to feel you were inadequate because you're not feeding tor 40 minutes! Everyone's different.
If it's any consolation, my dd was the same, I would feed for 10 or 15 minutes every couple of hours with one huge feed at bedtime. I agree with SD, it's better to go by how contented he is and how much weight he puts on.
Hi, Tipex, am absolutely no expert but can just tell you from my own experience, that as my dd2 got older she took her feds quicker and quicker, also she fed pretty much around the clock until three months, then she fed all day but slept all night. I think that if your ds is gaining weight and has wet nappies then he is fine. Keep going, I formula fed my first and it is such a faff - breastfeeding is a doddle by comparison! Lots of luck, I'm sure someone will be able to give you great advice on here.
If the mid-shop feed only takes 10 minutes, is it a problem? Or do you not like feeding in public?
As others have said, he may well be getting a good feed in those ten minutes. Its just that breastmilk gets digested in 2 hours, so he's ready for more. In the next few weeks, he'll probably start going for a bit longer.
Are you certain that he is asking for food when he cries after an hour? And not wanting to suck himself to sleep, or wanting to suck because he is bored, or just plain wanting to suck?
Please dont worry your DS is just getting good at it. My 4 all got down to 5/10 mins each side and my 4 month old is now only 10 mins each side sometimes less. Unfortunately Bfed babes need feeding more often due to ease of Bmilk digestion, could be a growth spurt too. I know it feels like you never stop but it will get better. Baby whisperer is way off by my experience on this, she also recommends feeding on one side only, great if you like walking around with one full and one empty boob, not fun!
If you are still worried - get yourself along to a breastfeeding counsellor. They are fabby and know everything about breastfeeding.
Also they are free and very helpful.
Normal! My dd also feeds fast now (8 weeks). I would bet your ds is going through a growth spurt - hence more frequent feeds. If you just go with the flow for now things will turn out fine and the gap between feeds will increase again - well, that's what happened to me. Don't try to persuade, it will only end in tears (yours probably!)
I bet in a couple of weeks it will all be different. If not, post again!
It sounds like you're doing brilliantly, and getting some sleep too!
He's still so young, this time will pass
Tipex, this is all on the normal spectrum for a baby of this age - it makes no sense, truly, to try and change it. Please don't ever think the Baby Whisperer book knows anything about breastfeeding. I can't tell you how much she gets wrong.
The Baby Whisperer expects 40 minutes of breastfeeding? How on earth does that work? (Ok, not at all, I'm guessing?)
DS1 always needed longer than that, and DS2 has never had that long. Now it seems like about three minutes, max.
I think everyone should pee for exactly 90 seconds, seven times a day. And if you can't do that, there's a problem.
Completely normal Tipex. He feeds for less time because he's got a lot better at getting milk out of your breasts quickly, and he's probably feeding more often because he's having a bit of a growth spurt, and he's sleeping longer at night so needs to get in enough feeds during teh day. My ds is a great feeder (now 11 months and takes only 5 mins for each of his 2 bf's) but will still only take a few ounces on the rare occasions I give EBM.
Agree probably growth spurt. Well done Tipex, you're doing a great job
my ds and dd did the same and feed feed feed but by 12 weeks it settled, just try to relax into it, do you have otherchildren or "duties", if not take it easy and just follow the babys lead, i wish i did that with dd as i stressed myself out no end
whereas with ds it was much less fretful, not fret free but less!
Agree with everything said. DD1 b'fed for about an hour at first which according to Baby Wisperer (which sounds so good on paper - then again, so does Gina Ford!!) was too long then all of a sudden - can't remeber at what age - she was suddenly sone in 5 mins and I used to try and stuff more down her which only resulted in her being violently sick. They most definitely are all different!
You've all reassured me so much, thanks for the replies. Hes still feeding like a demon today but went 6 1/2 hours again last night and seems fairly happy with himself (altho hes got a bit overtired tonight!!). I have chucked the book in the bin at my mums suggestion and feel better for it. Isnt it amazing how one book can make you feel its all going pete tong? I'll see how it pans out over then next few weeks. Its does seem to have coincided with his sleeping thru the night and yes, just at the age for a growth spurt. Certainly means I'm getting to know where all the park benches, quiet cafes and feeding rooms are in town!!
The bin is the best place for any book that makes you feel like that!!! all babies are different, my ds was exactly the same as yours but by 12 weeks would go 9 hours with a 10 minute feed at 4am, when you are used to it I could get up feed him and be back in bed within 12minutes (I timed it occasionally, sad I know!!)but he grew and was a large happy baby, and in the span of things 12 minutes in the middle of the night is nothing compared to a 9 hour night!!
So chin up , the worst thing you can do is get stressed by it, that's when feeding problems can start!! as long as he is growing and you can cope with the hourly feeding during the day don't worry!!!!! and think of the poor people who get up every 1-2hours day AND NIGHT!!!!
And you think you have problems !!
remember everything you read is just a guideline. Your boobs may produce milk faster than the average and your lo may be a faster, more efficient feeder. (rip baby whisperer, tracy hogg died last November so we shouldn't slag her off too much!)
my 5mth has only had 10-15 mins (on one sided feeding - no odd boobs though) since about 3mth. so i agree with everyone else, what you're experiencing is perfectly normal. go with the flow and any probs soon iron themselves out
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