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Please help - baby won't let go of nipple ALL night, I'm exhausted

(16 Posts)
Pushpinia Tue 30-Sep-08 07:00:42

I thought it was just teething and maybe it's still partly that but it's been weeks now and he just won't let go.

He falls asleep, then after a second he clocks he's let go and starts rooting again and if I don't let him have it he starts to cry.

I really wouldn't mind if he was littler but he's 16mo and I am just completely losing the plot.

I've tried feeding him a yogurt before bed, which seems to help but he will still wake sometime between midnight and 3am and then 'feed' from me until 6am. I don't think there's even much coming out.

I think it is comfort and I have been trying to introduce a dummy but he won't have it or indeed a bottle...getting a bit desperate and would appreciate any tips especially on how to get him to have a bottle.

TIA smile

hercules1 Tue 30-Sep-08 07:02:19

You have to be harsh. Dont be accessible at night. Wear a bra to bed if you need to. Let him cry. It may last a couple of nights but he'll soon realise.

Pushpinia Tue 30-Sep-08 07:02:58

perhaps he knows he's losing the breast and is kind of clinging on?

I have previously weaned off for a few days during the day (not at night) but he is now having some day feeds again.

Pushpinia Tue 30-Sep-08 07:04:41

Hercules I think yes it has become his habit and he'll be put out to be denied it.,but was hoping for a less harsh way - i thought if he'd take a bottle instead it would really help me.

do they call it a 'transitional object' or is that the soft toy blankie thing? My mum keeps going on about it being a transitional period for him. hmm i wish she would explain this stuff..

hercules1 Tue 30-Sep-08 07:08:06

The trouble is you'll just be swapping one thing for another. Trust me I speak from experience. When I weaned dd from night feeds I partly did it by rubbing her back to get her back to sleep, roll on a few months and I was still rubbing her back! I dont think there is a kind way to wean them tbh.

Pushpinia Tue 30-Sep-08 07:09:21

Yes - i hear you smile

but how do you get them to sleep without something? Is that even possible?

mawbroon Tue 30-Sep-08 08:51:25

My ds was like that for a long long time.

I have found that denying him feeds in the night makes him feed more in the day, and denying him feeds in the day makes him feed more at night. I have also seen his behaviour deteriorate when I try to cut down and the slightest little blip (him being ill, or us being away) puts us right back to square one.

I have concluded from this that he still really needs the comfort and I have just let him get on with it because I don't see the point in us all getting distressed about it.

I am sure that i read in LLL's "How weaning happens" book that if the behaviour can be changed fairly easily without much fuss then it is just a habit, however if there is a lot of stress and upset, then it is likely that it is still a need for the child.

It might be worth you seeing if you can get a hold of this book. It covers all aspects of partial and complete weaning.

Pushpinia Tue 30-Sep-08 11:25:47

Mawbroon I like your post and will have a look for the book.

I have always been pretty laissez faire regarding bfing but I suppose the problem as I see it is that I can't get any rest at all while this is going on. I do feed on my side but even so it's quite hard to actually sleep when someone is attached to your nipple and you're poised about to topple over, maybe I need to adjust my technique!

Also having ahd recurring mastitis recently I am quite anxious to cut down.

I think I'll persevere at trying to introduce a 'bockle' as that's what I ended up doing with ds1 and it meant I got to sleep a bit more.

Thanks for answering smile

mawbroon Tue 30-Sep-08 13:33:42

Perhaps trying another position would be helpful. I wonder if you are lying on your breast preventing it emptying fully when you lie on your side. I had a few probs with blocked ducts (luckily didn't turn into mastitis) which stopped when I started to sleep on my back.

I can feed ds when I lie on my back. He lies on his side facing in and I have his head/neck in the crook of my arm. I find I get much more sleep like that. I would bet at 17 months, your ds is an expert at latching and could probably do it if you were hanging upside down!!! smile

Good luck, it's always hard trying to find the best solution.

Pushpinia Tue 30-Sep-08 15:13:43

Thanks, I think I'm the opposite! I was lying on my back before it all started, I now make sure I'm sideways as before I think his latch slipped as he wasn't 'tummy in' properly.
I wouldn't mind risking it but can't have any more antibiotics as the last lot made me really ill, so have got to just stop I think.

Oh well...he had a pretty good innings!

I have to convince him that SMA is really really nice now. grin

I have had it on my cereal and it is vile!

mawbroon Tue 30-Sep-08 15:21:02

Why formula? He could go straight on to normal cows milk couldn't he?

Much less hassle and tastes better!

mawbroon Tue 30-Sep-08 15:21:02

Why formula? He could go straight on to normal cows milk couldn't he?

Much less hassle and tastes better!

Pushpinia Tue 30-Sep-08 16:44:21

Well he likes neither so am hedging bets!! I have a tin of the stuff to use up now...wink

mawbroon Tue 30-Sep-08 20:17:00

LOL, fair enough! smile

vlc Tue 30-Sep-08 23:39:20

I can't help much with advice to dissuade him from ths, pushpinia, but when my dd was like this I found somethng that helped with the sidelying "topple over" discomfort...I would use one of the v-shaped pillows as a pillow, my head on one 'arm' of it, the other arm down my spine, tucked in tightly. I found it eased the strain caused by trying to prevent myself from rolling onto my back. I think side lying can be really uncomfortable if you are a back sleeper.

Hope that helps!

Pushpinia Thu 02-Oct-08 07:25:10

Hi vlc and thankyou for the advice! I used to have one of those pillows and will see if I can find it. I think it would definitely help! smile

That or a suit of armour. He might be dissuaded by an inch of solid steel between his mouth and my norks grin

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