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Failed to BF DD want to try with new baby

(12 Posts)
Minniethemoocher Fri 26-Sep-08 19:50:16

I failed to successfully breast feed DD. I had a haermorrage after her birth and I was so run down that a bottle was easier, as DH could do the night feeds. I also found that it was absolute agony! Pain of her feeding was nearly as bad as child birth and I used to dread her crying to be fed. It was like having broken glass ground into my nipples.

What can I do now to help me successfully breast feed my new baby, due in 4 weeks? Should I start using nipple cream of something?

Is it always SO painful? She latched on properly and I feel so bad that I didn't breast feed her....blush

nickytwotimes Fri 26-Sep-08 19:54:13

Minnie, I'll be watching this with interest.
I bfed ds for 2 weeks before giving up. It was so painful - like you say worse than giving birth. I still have nightmares about it and I'm not even pregnant again yet! Just know you are not the only one! There are lots of very helpful bfers on here, thank God. I hope to get the support I lacked last time too.

yousaidit Fri 26-Sep-08 19:56:48

I'll hog this thread for advice too, thanks! DC2 due 2 weeks and dd did not feed from me (not for want of trying on my part and a very stressful couple of weeks after she was born of seeking advce and banging our heads against a brick wall), so any useful advice would be appreciated!!!

Janus Fri 26-Sep-08 19:58:55

minnie, some will say nothing will make a difference but for me with dd3 I was determined to try something to stop the absolute agony of the first 10 days of feeding. So I bought lanisoh and rubbed in for about a month before due (quite vigorous rubbing, twice a day). I have to say, this time around I did not have one day of pain compared to nearly giving up with both of my first two children.
Could be coincidence but if I ever have any more grin I will do the same.
Good luck!

AnarchyAunt Fri 26-Sep-08 19:59:18

Sorry to hear about what happened with your DD - and please don't feel bad about it.

Nipple cream unnecessary IMO, much better off seeing or speaking to a bf counseller to check latch, and to rule out anything such as thrush or tongue tie, both of which can cause pain when feeding.

cafebistro Fri 26-Sep-08 20:04:38

Please dont worry Minnie. I dont care what the 'experts' say,breastfeeding is painful to begin with but if you can get through the first few weeks it gets so much easier.
I fed DS for 5 weeks because of lack of support etc and felt awful about it for a long time. My DD is 7 months and I am still feeding her. I just persevered because it was so important to me after only feeding DS for a short time. I'm not sure if preparing you're nipples will help to be honest...but it's worth trying. I found Lahsinol ( not sure about spelling) excellent, you apply it after feeding. When my nipples got so bad that I contemplated giving a bottle I used breast shields, just until my nipples had healed. Try and get as much support and advice from the hospital before you're dicharged regarding latching on etc. Ant remember you can always post on here for advice. I wish you the best of luck. smile

Rangirl Fri 26-Sep-08 20:06:25

I tried for 6 weeks with DD,totally nightmare,she hardly put on any weight I was totally determined to bf I went to BF support every day,Gave up at 6 weeks,felt guilty until she went on to solids.Ds came alomg 16 months later,BF no problem,kept going until he was 13 months!I wish I had some tips but honestly I don't know why it was different If anything I was less up for it with DS ,felt like it probably wouldn't work ,very much @I'll try it but probably won't work'attitude.Maybe I was less stressed,maybe it was just the baby was different .Both born by CS

Umlellala Fri 26-Sep-08 20:07:07

I mixed fed dd for 3 weeks. Have exclusively bf ds for 10 weeks now.

With dd I did have the toe-curling thing not always but sometimes. And she looked like she latched properly. This time, the initial latch did not hurt at all shock - and have had only occasional let-down pain, and the odd bit here and there, which has been improved by rechecking latch and checking latch.

Had lots of advice from MarsLady and others on here. Also read masses of useful info on www.howbreastfeedingworks.com and www.kellymom.com to arm yourself. Also, I prepped dh quite a lot about what to expect and what is normal...

It can be done! And it really did get easier after 3 weeks and 6 weeks. Good luck!

TooTiredToday Fri 26-Sep-08 20:11:49

hate your thread title - 'failed'.... sad

sorry, but I found the beginning of b/f very painful, and increasingly so with each dc - but I fed them all for 12+ months as I knew it gets better and easier with time. Toe curlingly painful at first, and after pains to content with as well. BUT I found it did improve.

As someone has already said, talking to a b/f counsellor might help pre-birth, as well as when your baby arrives. Wonder if some sort of relaxation thing might help, so that the hormones can do their work better.

Plonker Fri 26-Sep-08 20:13:14

Minnie, i failed to feed both my first dc's past 3 days sad and was absolutley dogged determined to feed dc3 for longer. I am still feeding her at 14 months smile

I second (or should that be, third) the vote for lansinoh, its truly magic stuff! I didn't use it before dd was born but did use it as soon as i started feeding her. I did so on the advice of my midwife as dd was tongue-tied and mw thought that feeding could very well be painful (it was until she had her tongue tie released).

Anyway, my best advice to you would be to arm yourself with as much information as humanly possible. Pop along to a breasfeeding support group and build a network of support before baby is born. Have some support no's handy too.

Bf-ing shouldn't be painful, but as lots and lots of women can testify to, it sometimes is. Pain is almost always caused by an incorrect latch, so having someone check your latch would be of huge benefit to you.

The first few weeks are very very hard, or they were for me, but if you can keep going through the first few weeks, the experience is amazing! One of the best things that i have ever done smile

Good luck to you.

Sycamoretree Fri 26-Sep-08 20:21:38

I managed this - very similar story Minnie. What can I say - you are just more determined this time round because you know the pitfalls. You know you have MN for advice and support if the going gets tough. I just HAD to get it right second time round and I did. Probably helped that I had an elective c section so wasn't exhausted as I was with DD (10 days in hospital, labouring, 3 inductions, waters broken, drip, heart rate plummet, emergency c-seciton, paralysis etc etc you name it). I was so exhausted I forgot to even try to feed her and she was so doped up from all the drugs she slept for about 4 hours.

Just get all your contact numbers in order now. Know who you are going to call or where you are going to go if things get tricky. Buy a hand held pump - My avent one was great - so much better than the crappy electric thing I had first time around.

You can do it!

hotmama Fri 26-Sep-08 20:26:03

Minnie - hopefully I can give you some hope!

DD1 was basically mixfed from the start - I gave up bf completely by 9 weeks.

I was so determined to be more successfully with dd2. I went to La Leche classes and got a counsellor to visit me 3 days after coming home with dd2.

( My birth stories are in the childbirth thread - I have started a thread wanting to know successful VBAC stories as I am now having ds1)

Anyway, back to the point, the best thing I learned was to bf lying down - really helped with night feeds!

Get in some Lansinoh for sore nips - found it very helpful, and I got some breast shells to get my nips in a better shape before feeding (I have got quite flat nipples).

In the first few weeks, I did occasionally use nipple shields at the beginning if the pain was too toe curling (I found the avent ones the best)

Anyway, I exclusively bf dd2 for 28 weeks before weaning her onto solids and actually bf until she was just after 1 - so it can be done!

I was determined to be more successful with dd2 - and La Leche really helped - as well as all these lovely mnetters with their fab advice.

Don't beat yourself up about it.

(Big smile emoticon)

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