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No milk!! Please help?

(13 Posts)
JordTyler Tue 19-Aug-08 16:14:13

Right, this may be a long one!

My DS has always been a difficult feeder (came out fighting) He was weighed last wed, and had lost weight (boo hoo) this was due to the fact that we went a away with friends who my DP was not happy with me feeding in front of so 25% of 10 days were bottles. I came home and thought right lets do this properly, but alsas there is now not enough there.

BFC has told my to feed for as long as i can(he scratches lots, and just pulls away all the way though) then top up with 2oz, then express about 10 mins each side. But i can't! My pump(tomee tipee) is crap, DS1 can be hard work at the worst times and DP just doesn't care!!

I'm guessing i don;t really have a question, just can't belive how determind (sp?) i was and it's all gone wrong. I was thinking a proper pump would be better but i can't rent one and BFC has tried everything but no luck?

What do i do?

JordTyler Tue 19-Aug-08 16:15:21

Ps. he is 11 weeks, and due to top ups only has put on weight since wed.

moondog Tue 19-Aug-08 16:16:30

Feed andfeed some more.
What iswrong with yuor dp?
Why didn't he want you feeding in front of these people?

JordTyler Tue 19-Aug-08 16:19:38

He is stupid is my answer to that! they are his friends and that was it! unless i sat in caravan whole time i didn't get much choice.

moondog Tue 19-Aug-08 16:21:51

That isbloody outrageous.
Unforgivable for him to do this to you.
You just need to keep on feeding. Have yuo looked at Kellymom website? Also How Breastfeeding works website.

northender Tue 19-Aug-08 16:23:53

md's right, keep going. Try not to get stressed as that doesn't help, lots of time cuddling lo. Try not to get hung up on the weight issue. It will get easier!

northender Tue 19-Aug-08 16:26:39

Do you have supportive friends and family (other than dp)? Spending time with people who you feel relaxed around when feeding would be good. If not try to find a bfing group so you get support from other mums in similar situations.

hercules1 Tue 19-Aug-08 16:33:56

WHat an arse of a husband you have.

Becky77 Tue 19-Aug-08 16:38:03

I recommend to Ameda Lactaline electric pump... You can get one off ebay for around £50

tiktok Tue 19-Aug-08 17:07:26

JordTyler, while agreeing that adults who put their own comfort levels ahead of the nutrition, health, happiness and convenience of a tiny baby (and its mother) are hard to sympathise with, I don't think this is a major supply crisis. I don't agree with what your bfc has said - feeding 'as long as you can' will lead to struggles and you don't want these. 2 oz top ups are unlikely to do anything except work against your supply and messing about with expressing just leads to more time consuming hassle. Was this a real bfc who told you all this?

Instead, several days of holding your baby close skin to skin as often as you can day and night will bring your supply back very quickly because you will end up feeding often - 2-3 mths of breastfeeding is not permanently compromised with a few days of bottles over a period of a week.

Yes, you will need support to do this, or the ability to ignore your DP

JordTyler Tue 19-Aug-08 17:52:54

i wish i could spend skin to skin time but in the day i don't think i would fit much in. She really was a BFC, been a midwife for 18 years and just completed her HV training, and was a extended BF herself.

i think what i want to know is that if i feed baby at every oppertunity (sp?) will he be starving?

He is sleeping a lot at mo, and i've heard this happens when they are being underfed. I know i'm not purposly not feeding him, but i'm finding it hard to judge when to wake him to feed, as i've only just learnt not to watch the clock!!

wastingmyeducation Tue 19-Aug-08 20:02:41

I can't see the point of expressing in your circumstances, as generally, the baby will get the milk out better, and you haven't a problem with the latch etc. Incidentally, my HV leant me a hospital grade electric pump (that I did not want and didn't use) when we were concerned about LOs weight gain, but not sure if they all have them available.
You say you haven't time to do the skin to skin, but it is literally a few days to get supply back up, not something you need to do long term and it so worth it. A few days without cleaning up won't hurt, or get your DP to do it!
Are you getting plenty of wet nappies? If so, he's in no danger.


tiktok Tue 19-Aug-08 20:45:19

JordTyler, I am not at all reassured by your bfc's qualifications - sorry What she recommended to you is not most 'real' bfcs would recommend or, in fact, would be permitted to recommend (use of formula is an intervention - needs to be sanctioned by the mum's own HP).

Doing what she suggested (feeding until the baby will not take any more, topping up, expressing) is way more time consuming than simply 'wearing' your baby skin to skin, which takes no time at all, but is maybe a bit inconvenient and clumsy (or can feel that way at first). I don't understand your concerns about feeding at every opportunity = starving....have I missed something here? Feeding at every opportunity i) increases the stim of the milk supply ii) increases the calories going into the baby.

He can sleep skin to skin with you, and you will find he simply won't sleep the hours away doing this, as he will come out of a deep sleep, and instead of dropping off to sleep again, he will give little feeding cues...which you can then quickly respond to

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