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Not sure what to do...

(20 Posts)
helips Fri 08-Aug-08 15:28:23

My ds is about to turn one and so far has been exclusively breastfed, something which I am very proud of and have enjoyed immensely! Anyway, I have been thinking about maybe starting to give him cows milk during the day and breastfeeding him in the morning and at bedtime. The thing is, Im not sure how much cow's milk to give him or whether to give it in a bottle or cup? At the moment he has 4 breast feeds a day, morning, mid-morning, mid-afternoon and bedtime. Should I offer him some cows milk mid-morning and afternoon straight away or just one feed a day until my boobs adjust?

I'm still not a 100% sure if I'm doing this for the right reasons though as I feel a bit sad about not breastfeeding (even though I still plan to do 2 feeds for a little while longer) I know at some point I will have to stop breastfeeding all together and I feel that it will be easier to wean ds off now rather then when he is a toddler. But I love breastfeeding and just the thought of giving up makes me feel a bit teary! (not helped by my first period just arriving I'm sure!) I also feel that some family and friends think it's about time I gave up and even though I think its a rediculous reason It still makes me feel more pressure to wean ds off the boob now and save a lot of grief later.

Anyway, sorry for waffling on! S'pose all I really want is to get that off my chest so to speak! Also any advice re the cows milk would be great, Thanks!

lilymolly Fri 08-Aug-08 15:33:53

Re the cows milk- why not offer some in a cup with his meals?
Will he take a cup- Personally would not use a bottle as he is over 1

Or you could try at his mid morning/afternoon snack in conjunction with some fruit/food snack?

That way you can drop 2 breastfeeds and maintain the other 2.

helips Fri 08-Aug-08 15:46:28

He has water in a tommee tipee cup but only takes little sips, not sure if he would drink a lot of milk out of it (he also loves to tip water everywhere!) Like the idea of combining with a snack though, but not sure how much to give. I have no idea how much milk he has at the moment!

ajm200 Fri 08-Aug-08 15:53:44

Offer a small cup with each meal. If he finishes it you can always top it up.

lilymolly Fri 08-Aug-08 15:58:06

agree ajm200

helips Fri 08-Aug-08 15:59:55

Great, why didn't I think of that, makes perfect sense really grin

chipmonkey Fri 08-Aug-08 16:00:29

helips, sorry if this doesn't help but it doesn't sound to me like you are cutting down for the right reasons. You're not doing it for your ds; the extra protection of bf would be good for him, even into toddlerhood. You're not doing it for yourself, it's making you teary!
So if it's not for him and it's not for you, I'd be damned if I'd do it for "family and friends" because it's no skin off their noses whether you bf or not.

Anyhow, to answer your question, generally my boys at that age took around 4 oz of milk, water or juice at mealtimes. With ds1 I did have to cut down on the cows milk, because it made him too full to eat and also contributed to his glue ear. Btw, I stopped bfing ds1 and ds2 at 12 months, they both got glue ear. Ds3 was bf till 2.8 and he didn't get glue ear. It may have been just coincidence but I will be bfing ds4 till at least 2.

taliac Fri 08-Aug-08 16:21:11

I'd bf him as and when you feel comfortable (eg am and pm and before nap maybe) and then give cows milk as a drink as you would any other drink, ie water or juice or whatever.

But thats just me.

LynseyKCalvert Fri 08-Aug-08 16:29:21

I've been informed using bottles after a year is bad.
DS is 22mths and BF he has water or cows milk from a cup (doesn't like juice) I started offering cows milk from a year nd it hasn't changed his nursing at all. If he's away from me for a few hours he will ask for moo juice and won't take EBM anymore. He will nap/sleep without me on the odd occasion I go out but still goes to sleep at the breast normally.

As for amounts I can't help. We've always been led by him as to how much of anthing he eats/drinks. As we use an open beaker I don't put more than a few oz in. He can ask for more but not often.

As for weaning, it doesn't sound like you're ready to give it up so I wonder what your motivation is to wean early.

helips Fri 08-Aug-08 16:46:33

grin at moo juice!

I'm still going to give his morning and evening boob feed but feel I need to wean him off eventually and this will be easier to do sooner rather than later. Do I need to warm the cows milk or just give it straight from the fridge?

My friends and family think it's brilliant I've got this far but feel it's time for me to stop, although if I continue I'm sure they would support my decision.

ChipMonkey, what is glue ear?

Thanks for all your responses!

ajm200 Fri 08-Aug-08 17:56:19

We started out warming cows milk as we thought the transition from body temp BF milk to cows milk may be enough of a change without a drop in temperature too. After a few months he got some cold milk shoved at him in the early hours and loved it. Now he always has it cold.

helips Fri 08-Aug-08 19:48:00

Great, So I have given it some more thought and I am definately going to give him cows milk during the day but am not going to give myself a definate time on when to stop morning and night feeds. Will just play it by ear and stop when I feel the time is right (hopefully ds will decide that for me!)

Thanks for the advice everyone. Mumsnet is great!

moondog Fri 08-Aug-08 19:54:48

You don't even need to igve him cows' milk at all. If you weren't with him, he would manage just find without breastmilk all day anyway.Beware of being pressured into giving up if in your heart you don't want to. smile

chipmonkey Fri 08-Aug-08 20:41:39

helips, glue ear is a build-up of fluid in the middle ear. It causes a temporary hearing loss and in the case of my two lads, required surgery. There is thought to be a link between glue ear and cow's milk getting into the eustachian tubes in the middle ear.

helips Sat 09-Aug-08 08:57:51

Hi Chipmonkey, I have done some more research and apparently giving bottles after a year can lead to ear infections so I will be using a cup. Still intend to breastfeed for morning and evening feeds but now unsure as to whether I'm going to give cows milk or just cut out ds day feeds. What to do?!!

taliac Mon 11-Aug-08 10:40:08

Just wondering, do you have a particular reason for not offering cows milk?

IMO if your LO isn't allergic then dairy is a vital part of a growing child's diet.

helips Thu 21-Aug-08 14:47:33

Well , my little man turned 1 yesterday and I'm still breastfeeding! Spoke to dh about wanting to keep on breastfeeding and he said he has no problem with that and to keep going as long as I want. Really good to know I have his support and have spoken to a few friends who are still breastfeeding and they have both reassured me about extended breastfeeding.

Anyway, think I will just carry on as I am as it feels like the natural thing to do. Can anyone tell me if it will be difficult getting ds to stop the older he gets? I'm really hoping he will self wean but don't know when this is likely to be. It will be so much easier if he self weans rather than me getting him to stop. Can anyone who breastfed after a year tell me how it went and when there child stopped? Thanks!

Pidge Thu 21-Aug-08 14:55:23

helips - my first dd self-weaned age 2, though that could have been because I got pregnant - she was down to one morning feed a day, and went off it just as my morning sickness was getting serious. Very handy!

Dd2 was a bit more hooked on the feeding, and didn't stop until she was 2.5 or even a bit older. How can I already have forgotten, it's only a year ago! But she too was down to one feed a day, and sort of gradually started missing it occasionally of her own accord, or because I was dashing out to work.

I loved feeding them till then. Definitely no need to drop it until you're both good and ready. Enjoy it!

helips Thu 21-Aug-08 19:32:07

Thanks Pidge, I'm still really enjoying breast feeding, it is so easy and good for ds so feels right to carry on. I hope he does self wean, at the moment he is still having 4 feeds a day (sometimes 5 if I need to feed him to sleep for his afternoon nap!) When do they start dropping feeds and can you remember how old they were when they were just having 1 feed a day?

theSuburbanDryad Thu 21-Aug-08 19:38:21

helips - if you don't feel like you want to give up bf-ing then don't! It's good to have the support of your dh and friends, I found it invaluable when I was having a bit of a wobble about feeding ds a few weeks ago.

Don't forget, in many countries it's totally normal to "still" be breastfeeding at 12 months, it's just the UK that's abnormal in its breastfeeding rates! grin

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