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Feel so guilty but don't know what to do

(15 Posts)
SueDonym Fri 25-Jul-08 20:04:46

My DH wants me to give up BF. I sort of want to, but I can't stop, and sneak off to feed DS (4 months) because I know it is best and he loves it sooooo much. I need to stop so that I can have a break before number two (starting trying next month, probably) and lose the weight, etc, but I like it. He likes it. No, he LOVES it and cries when I give him bottles. Is anyone else beating themselves up about stopping BF? Giving up smoking was child's play compared to this...I can't help myself. Keep sneaking it in!

thisisyesterday Fri 25-Jul-08 20:07:02

I would suggest, that if you feel guilty and you don't want to give up, that you shouldn;t.

why the rush for number 2???

SueDonym Fri 25-Jul-08 20:08:46

Age. Can't hang about anymore.

Littlefish Fri 25-Jul-08 20:09:02

Don't do it if you don't want to.

Why does your DH want you to give up?

Plenty of people one here have got pregnant whilst breastfeeding.

Littlefish Fri 25-Jul-08 20:09:18

How old?

SueDonym Fri 25-Jul-08 20:11:18

40. It's all very tough. I think DH just sees how knackered I am and thinks that BF isn't helping. Oops...baby up, back soon..

thisisyesterday Fri 25-Jul-08 20:11:43

yes, there is no reason why you can't carry on breastfeeding through pregnancy, and beyond if you want to.

it seems a shame to give up just because you want another one

thisisyesterday Fri 25-Jul-08 20:12:17

you'd be even more knackered if you have all the extra hassle of buying formula, sterilising bottles, heating night feeds etc etc!
breastfeeding is the easy way out

callmeovercautious Fri 25-Jul-08 20:13:23

Are you sure you need to stop before TTC? I only know one (out of about 10) women who went on to have DC2 quickly that actually had to stop in order to concieve.

Also would 2m really hurt? can you talk to DH and see if you can get to 6m? It is a real milestone. As you know 2 years is ideal but it is a committment and not practical for many people.

If you and DS want to stop then do, if not carry on.

cthea Fri 25-Jul-08 20:14:48

40 isn't THAT old that a few months will make all the difference.

Breastfeeding - when it works, and it seems it does in your case - is MUCH easier than bottlefeeding. Having a baby is knackering, it's not just the feeding method.

Weight loss - important, of course, but not that important.

Neither weight loss nor immediate conception are guaranteed once you stop breastfeeding.

AbricotsSecs Fri 25-Jul-08 20:15:01

Message withdrawn

callmeovercautious Fri 25-Jul-08 20:17:00

Or consider combined feeding in a structured way so DS knows what he will get when? The reduced feeding might kick start your hormones enough to concieve. I may be wrong but I know someone it worked for.

e.g day time = formula, bedtime and night feeds = BF? I have found continuing to BF a real bonus if your LO wakes at night, much easier and a real comfort even when they are sick/teething. DD settles quite quickly on the breast but won't even consider a cup if her mouth is sore.

AbricotsSecs Fri 25-Jul-08 20:17:01

Message withdrawn

ruty Fri 25-Jul-08 20:17:18

breastfeeding is so much easier than bottles! and he is still so little to stop a t 4 months. Can you not at least wait until he is 6 months? It won;t make a big difference to your chances of conceiving again, but it will make a big difference for your 4 month old. smile

berolina Fri 25-Jul-08 20:17:39

I am tandem feeding my 3yo and 10mo Conception was not a problem.

Is your dh supporting you in other ways to help you feel less tired, e.g. doing his bit in the house? I really really would not give up due to pressure from him. It will do your relationship no good long-term.

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