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The only person who has a problem with extended breastfeeding round here is my DH!

(4 Posts)
MrsPickles Sat 12-Jul-08 13:56:49

Just reading the thread about unhelpful comments along the lines of "are you going to still be breastfeeding that child when its 5". I feel more than confident that I am doing the best thing for my 15m baby in continuing to feed her - but the only person who wants me to give up is my DH. On a daily basis he asks me when I'm going to stop breastfeeding.

Now, I can kind of see his point. She wakes up A LOT during the night and always wants milk from me & I suspect if I cut down the night feeds, it would entail a lot of screaming over a couple of weeks or so and then she'd probably sleep much better. She also sleeps in bed with us so I can just roll over and feed her - this is fine with me, not so much for DH and I do understand why he wants her to be in the cot. But that's not going to happen until I stop feeding her to sleep!

The difficulty is I don't want to give up breastfeeding. I work full time and do quite long hours so am away from DD all day and so can't feed in the day instead. Sometimes I only see DD for half an hour a day to put her to bed - but I get to feed her so we have a lovely cuddle. And then I bring her into bed with me a bit later on (she starts the night in the cot) and we have cuddles/milk all night long, as much as she wants it (I lose track but she just helps herself up to 5 or 6 times a night I think). I don't think DH realises how much I would miss that if I gave up - at the moment it helps me justify working full time because DD really knows I'm there at night.

So, what do I do? DD or DH? I just can't see a compromise. DH is getting so fed up and I can't blame him. I have a week off work booked at the beginning of August & I said I would try and wean her off the night feeds then.... but I don't really want to as I'm sure that will be the end of breastfeeding altogether. What to do....

aGalChangedHerName Sat 12-Jul-08 14:00:19

I am still feeding dd2 in the night and she will be 2 in August. My DH found it a squash with 3 of us in the bed (co slept and bf other 2dc's till they were 3 and nearly 2 yrs) so he sleeps in a single bed alongside us.

I would not give up unless you want to. My DH thankfully is v supportive of my extended bfing. I do have the odd moan about it when i am v tired but he knows how important it is to me.

No advice but i feel for you xx

cafebistro Sat 12-Jul-08 14:02:53

I can see your DHs point of view especially with your DD being in your bed at night but i do think he's being a bit selfish wanting you to stop bf. Its something thats usually only done for a relatively short amount of time so he should be able to put up with it for a few more months when you and your DD may be ready to stop.

PotPourri Sat 12-Jul-08 14:09:40

Have you tried putting the cot up higher and removing the side so that she is beside you like an extension to your bed? and could dh wear earplugs?

The other stuff I think you need to explain why it is aso importanrt to you and ask him for his support to make it weork for you both (solution that suits all).

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