Please understand that I am so grateful that I have the chance to bf and offer the best to my dd (esp when there are mums out there who can't - please don't take this the wrong way).
In brief - when dd2 was born she was in SCBU for 36 hours and I wasn't given a pump in the hospital, to express, for almost a whole day. In the mean time I had to consent to allow the nurses to feed her 2 bottles of formula cos she was starving and I couldn't not let her eat. Anyway, didn't get hardly anything out with pump - literally 2-3 drops. So when I finally had dd out of neo natal, I worked very hard getting milk established with formula to top her up. Milk came in on 4th day and was able to cut out formula.
Since we've been home I have been having problems with her latching on to breasts and a have had to give her either ebm or formulas every now and then. Majority of the time with a little perserverance, she will latch on and have a good feed.
My dilema however is that I really am not enjoying it this time round ( bf dd1 til she decided to stop at 9 months old). I hate it to the point where I am in tears cos I can't bear the stress of whether she will or not feed - especially in the nights when you just want to feed and then go back to sleep.
I have to admit that I am also feeling depressed and because I had pnd the first time I feel it might have started already and therefore this might be contributing to the fact that i have no desire to do this.
Is it easier bottle feeding? I do not want to express and feed! this would be a nightmare IMO.
I hope i've explained myself. I don't think i've even touched on the guilt I'm feeling for even thinking about this.
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Infant feeding
dd is 2 weeks old and i'm thinking of stopping bf...
7 replies
mads1 · 11/07/2008 13:21
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