I spoke to a breastfeeding counsellor today who told me......

[mawbroon]

..... that my ds is completely normal.

He is now 2.7 and wants to feed constantly.

He is fairly placid, but seems to be going through a bit of a sensitive time at the moment. If I as much as look at him the wrong way then he bursts into tears.

He doesn't really tantrum much, but instead seems to express himself by asking for milk when he is angry or frustrated. If I dare to divert my attention to something else like the dishes or the cooking, then he is distraught and wails and wails for mummy's milk. Distraction works to a point, but not for long.

BFC says it is very common for 2yos to want to feed more and more often, and she said it was especially common for boys.

It just feels like he is going to be feeding for ever more which isn't going to aid my breastfeeding related ttc difficulties.

Anyone else been here, and how did it work out for you and your LO?

[whomovedmychocolate]

DD is 19 months old and exactly the same - wouldn't mind but I'm heavily pregnant and it's a tad wearing.

My breastfeeding counsellor confidently asserting 'oh she'll quit by the last trimester because the milk will taste funny'.

As long as you are happy though, does it matter? He will grow out of this stage (and so hopefully will my DD!)

[TinkerbellesMum]

Tink is like that. She either wants me to feed her or is asking for yogurt. He probably won't be feeding for much longer, although they can feed until they're 7, they don't normally, so it will end soon.

You should still be ovulating, I know my cycle isn't regular though, only roughly about a month apart. I'm going to be starting TTC later this year, but I don't know how that's going to work as I can't know when I'm ovulating.

[kiskideesameanoldmother]

been there with dd when she was coming up to 2. never tantrummed either, also went into immediate meltdown if you tried to distract her.

i sometimes felt like i was feeding 200 times a day for 20secs each time.

it disappeared as quickly as it came on.

it also seemed to tie in with her growing awareness that social protocols existed and she wanted desperately to conform but didn't know the rules. it made many other ordinary things for her stressful.

[fishie]

mb i too have somebody very keen. he is 3.1 now and still the same. i do have restrictions but i work so am less available, it is a bit relentless at weekends.

i am nearly 40 and would love another baby, but it isn't that likely (no contraception for 5 yrs and only one pg) so i won't stop bf on the off chance.

[bealcain]

I'm a BFC and have to say i agree with what she said to you mawbroon. It is totally normal for children of any age to go through phases of wanting more milk. It may not necessarily be more milk they want but just closeness with you. I would tend (personally) to not try distraction absolute, i would instead offer a big mummy hug and maybe quiet time together with a story cuddled on the sofa.

i'm am 8months with dc3 and still breastfeeding both ds1 and ds2 (both under3 btw) it had made no difference to my fertility and in fact it is said to aid in conception once you have ovulated (something to do with hormones and stuff)

i would persevere with bf but maybe try to cut it out during the day with said mummy cuddle time and restrict (although that sounds a tad harsh a word)bf to morning and evening.

HTH or i might have totally missed the point!

[3madboys]

ds2 and ds3 were like this, fed ALL the time ds2 inparticular was a milk monster, he fed until he was almost 4 and it wasnt till after his third birthday that he started to cut down during the day.

at times it drove me mad, but we also had/still have a very close and special bond

i do remember getting lots of funny looks tho when out and about, particularly at his music group where for some reason he always had to feed loads.

like you say distraction only works for a limited amount of time, in the end it was far easier to feed him than distract him, and he did grow out of it, gradually

ds3 was the same again he has been weaned about 2 months now and still occasionally asks for milkies, but is easy to distract with a home made smoothie or some similar treat

oh and despite mine being bfeeding monsters and me having no periods, i still got pregnant whilst, so tandem fed ds2 and ds3 and then ds3 and ds4 tho i have sadly had to put him on the bottle as i just couldnt cope wiht bfeeding anymore, 6yrs of constant feeding took its toll

[fishie]

bealcain that is really good point, i find it difficult to sit with ds without him either jumping on my head or asking for milk. more sitting would help i think.

[CantSleepWontSleep]

Dd (2.4) is another keen feeder mawbroon. It is good to know that she's not alone in being like this. I think she may be starting to teeth her back molars at the moment, and every bout of teething has resulted in her wanting to round the clock feed.

I'm 23 weeks pregnant too, so am hoping that she does ease off at least a bit soon (though am relying on her to keep up my supply until I have expressed some for new baby due to my gestational diabetes!).

Dd isn't so bad when we are out usually, but at home she is more demanding. Do you find the same?

Have you tried using the salad spinner to distract him .

[mawbroon]

Thanks for all your replies. I normally don't find this a problem, but just now, for the first time ever, I am kind of wishing that he wouldn't feed so much. I don't know why, but I do.

We do spend lots of time together snuggled up, reading, talking, singing etc, but it always leads to a request for milk. In fact, every activity leads to a request for milk.... Like somebody said, he is not too bad when we are out and about, but if we are anywhere that I am talking to others, he will demand, and that is the kind of situation where he will cuddle in, feed and probably go to sleep tbh!!

Re the fertility issue. I am ovulating and appear to have a fairly regular cycle. Breastfeeding seems to make me ovulate later in the month now -around day 15 - 18 depending on how much feeding he has been doing - compared with day 10 or 12 before. This leaves me with a short luteal phase which is problematic for implantation. When he was cut right down to around 4 feeds a day, I did manage to conceive, but lost it at around 6 weeks. He has been feeding so much that this month, I didn't ovulate until day 23!

Tinkerbellesmum - if you learn to check your cervix and cervical fluid, then you will be able to tell when your body is preparing to ovulate, and charting temperatures will confirm that it has happened. Toni Weschler's "Taking charge of your fertility" is a very good book

I have read "How weaning happens" but really it is no use, because I don't know what it is I want to do, and no book can tell me! The BFC did also say that perhaps I need to decide if I am going to wean or carry on, and then stick with it.

Hopefully it is just a phase....

[TinkerbellesMum]

TBH I've decided to wean now would be traumatic, I know how she is when I can't then.

I've thought about doing my temps, but my sleeping pattern is very erratic and I read that it has to be a bit better than mine. I didn't bother before because we're both very fertile to the point we know exactly what day Tink was conceived because it was day 13 and not much happened other than that as we were busy with Christmas. We even had a discussion before hand that this could possibly make a baby (a month earlier than planned). I used to know the exact time I would come on and now I don't even know the day. Oh well, we have a few months to go yet. I think we'll start with the every other day method, which worked with our first daughter, and if that doesn't work look into other things.

[mawbroon]

Tinkerbellesmum - yes traumatic is exactly how it would be here too. Saying that, DS woke at 1230 last night, so he and I co slept in the spare bed until he woke again around 4am. At that point, he kept trying to climb over me and feed from one side to the other and back again. I had just had enough, and said no and put him back in his own bed. You would have thought from his crying that something terrible had happened (and I guess from his point of view, it had!) but then after a couple of mins, he went to sleep until 6.50am. I was childminding today, and I just said no to all his requests as there were other children here to distract him. He is away now to his granny's so I can mumsnet practice for my gig at the weekend.

Re the temping, yes erratic sleep makes it more difficult. What I do is take my temp whenever ds wakes in the night and use that reading if I don't get a stretch of at least 3 hours before waking in the morning. It's not as accurate on the chart as taking it at the exact same time every morning, but coupled with checking my cervix and fluid, it gives me an ok idea of what's going on.

[TinkerbellesMum]

I've had that a few times with her. I judge it now, if she is sleepy and just woken up but won't go back off, I take her in. If she wants to get out I take her to another room and let her settle on my shoulder, when she has settled I put her back and if she cries just ignore her for a few minutes, she never takes long to go off.

I couldn't not give her her morning feed and she asks for some in the day too which I have to balance if it's practical and if she's distractable.

I rarely sleep this side of midnight and tend to be up before 6, often I get less than 3 hours.