Should my 7mth old be sleeping through the night??

[emmabemmasmom]

We all know there are people out there who lie about the wonders of their babies sleeping through the night from day one (or maybe they have magic babies) but I am sick of hearing from my friends and people I know that 'their babies' are sleeping through where as mine is not. I hate the whole competive aspect of being a parent, but I admit I do sometimes fall into that trap. Should my DD be sleeping through too??

She is 7.5 months old. She used to wake A LOT but then we moved her to her room and she does a lot better. Some nights she can wake 3-6 times, but wanting a feed 2 of the times (and the whole bottle..also add she is not even 9kg yet but is healthy and growing just tiny) Some nights, like last night she went down at 7pm, woke at 2am for a feed and then slept again until 8am. I just wish I knew what to expect as each night with DD is different.

When should I expect her to drop night feeds? Yes, I would love the sleep but most of all I would like to know if my DD is normal and not feel inferior that she is not sleeping through.

Any tips on maybe helping her to sleep through would always be helpful too

[seeker]

No shoulds. Some do. Some (like yours and mine) don't. More don't than do! She will get there -I promise. Mine did. Try to relax about it - it feels like it's going on forever - but it really is only a very short piece of your life that you have to do this.

[CoteDAzur]

Some babies drop night feeds on their own. Their parents then get to brag about how their babies sleep through

No need to feel inferior. It's not a competition.

I get screamed at every time I say this, but it was the best advice I got (ever) and would like to return the favor to another tired mum:

When DD was 4 months old and waking up twice at night (2 AM & 4-5 AM) for a feed, her paediatrician told us that if we didn't 'teach' her to sleep through, she would most probably wake up at these frequencies every night until the age of 2 or so. We were so scared of this prospect that we followed her advice and DD slept through in 3 nights.

Basically, you cut night feeds and when your DD wakes up at night, you put her back to sleep without a feed - by patting/shhing/rocking/singing, whatever works. DH was up with DD for hours the first night. It was easier the second night. We didn't hear from her the third night.

At 7.5 months, your DD doesn't have a physical need to feed at night. She is waking up for a feed because of a habit. You can change this habit by stopping the night feeds.

[lulumama]

Actually a 7.5 month old who is dowing a howle bottle once or twice a night is hungry , if not, she would vomit back up the milk, or just suck a bit for comfort and not take a whole feed

it is absolutely normal, especially if she is on the smaller side, to feed more often, her stomach cannot take enough in teh day to allow sleeeping through just yet

far better to get up and feed her and let her learn to regulate her own appetite.

going from 7 until 2 is a good chunk of sleep! and then another few hours after.. you are not missing out on that much sleep really !

[lulumama]

dowing a howle

Eh!! LOL obviously, i meant, downing a whole bottle !

[emmabemmasmom]

Thanks everyone!

Yeah I think cause she is on the small side, even though she has three meals a day they are small since she can't eat to much at one time, and also she is still on 3-4 bottles a day and only 150ml each bottle!

Some days she eats less and I know she will make it up at night, but I am not going to force her to eat loads.

I know I have it better than most people such as those with newborns(I remember being there!)But I would just like a night of unbroken sleep and since I don't know what to expect (some nights she is up at 9:30pm for another feed) I tend to try to 'wait up for her' so in the end I am still not getting a lot! And some mornings it is rise and shine at 5am! (I joke with DH cause she always sleeps later on days he is going to get up with her...daddies girl)

Thanks everyone for the advise and kind words

[MKG]

Have you started weaning yet, that may make a difference. Also how much is a whole bottle? Are you doing 6oz, 8oz, etc? You may want to up the amount per bottle. Also feeding more often during the day might help.

It may not make a difference, but if you want her to sleep through you can tweek some things you are doing and see if it helps.

She may sleep through soon, she may not sleep through for a long time (my nephew is 2.5 and still hasn't slept through yet).

Hope that helps.

[MKG]

x posts.

[lulumama]

i would offer more milk and less solids, especially if she is only taking a small amount. milk can be the main source of nutrition for the first year. always offer milk before food and don;t worry about giving water or juice either

[emmabemmasmom]

Yeah I always feed her a bottle first and she usually only has a third or half of a 180ml bottle and then I offer food and she may eat a few bites or an entire serving.

I always offer her milk but she just won't take it if she is not hungry and same with food.

She is just weird lol some days she eats like a trucker and sleeps like a rock too and others she eats like a bird and is up all night. I have let her go with her own schedule up till now...so I am just not sure how to nip this in the butt and say 'eat everything during the day!!' lol

[lulumama]

i don;t thikn you can, i think you have to go with her needs on this one! sorry

[VacantlyPretty]

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[MKG]

Well you could always just not give her a bottle at night. It will be torture for you, but she'll make up for it the next day and maybe you can start a new routine.

A friend of mine who has 3 grown kids gave me the best advice yesterday she said, "They come to live in your house, and need to follow your rules. They'll get used to it, you just have to train them".

Oh when are her naps. You may want to keep her a little more busy and active in the day. and also make naptime earlier so she'll go to bed more tired.
When all else fails: Wear them out!

[prideoftheyankees]

Lots of babies are sleeping through at about 6 months, but certainly not all. I have been blessed with wonderful sleepers (and early potty trainers) but they are not 'more advanced' than poor sleepers and are fairly middle of the road generally. People with small babies are ridiculously competetive about things which you can't do anything about such as rolling over or walking as if it means their child who sleeps through at 5 months will be a brain surgeon and your child who sleeps through at 10 months will be a drop out. Its all bollocks.

You can encourage her to sleep through by cutting her night feeds down and making sure she has a early breakfast so she has time during the day to get enough feeds in to see her through the night. eg if she wakes a 5am and gets a full bottle then she won't want a full bottle at 7ish and that will have a knock on effect on the rest of her feeds. If she is teeny then she may need a night feed for a while but you might be able to do a dream feed at your bedtime if that better for you.

[VacantlyPretty]

Message withdrawn

[jafina]

I can't say I agree with those who think night feeding will become a habit if you don't nip it in the bud. My 8mo dd was waking once or twice a night every night and feeding really well (she is bf) and then 2 weeks ago just suddenly stopped waking and had 5 nights through from 7pm to 6am in a row. I didn't do anything differently, she just did it herself. She now sleeps through most nights but occasionally wakes and i will feed her if she doesn't settle quickly (I have 2 other dc's and don't want dd to wake them).

I guess I could brag about how my baby now sleeps through, but since I didn't do anything to make it happen it seems wrong to go on about it.

emmabemma - your baby is not inferior, she is absolutely normal. If you don't mind it too much then it is NOT a problem. As for advice, try to get lots of milk into her during the day and try to put her down awake if you can. This last one has certainly helped my dd sleep better at naptimes and in the evening, not so much at night - that seemed to happen on its own.

good luck!

[nooname]

This might make you feel better..

My ds didn't give up night feeds til past 18mo and i was surrounded by friends whose babies slept through early...

Now ds is 2 and he sleeps fine and all their dc are now always waking up in the night and they don't know what's hit them!!

[puffylovett]

i absolutely DETEST the term 'should' be sleeping through, it made me feel so inferior and like a real failure when my LO wasn't sleeping through at 4 mths !!!!

(he's now 14 months and I repeat to myself daily - he'll sleep when he's ready !!!) seriously though, it's getting better now !!

they have so much developing to do, teething, growing, brain activity - and they have such little tummies, and they need fuel for ALL of it. personally i think it's quite cruel to sleep train before the baby is ready for it, and you'll know when that is - it's different for them all, i'm sure (she says, cowering under the bed too scared to tackle her LO's sleep issues [smle])

[babyOcho]

My DD is only 11 weeks and whenever I get the "blah blah sleeps through the night" I tell them that I love getting up when she needs a feed in the night... its means that I get extra cuddles!

[OK, I may feel differently in a few months!]

[popsycal]

Ds2 woke at 7 months old (and then some....). There are no 'shoulds'

[popsycal]

And to add....ds2 has just started sleeping through this week.
He is 3

[Greedygirl]

Emmabemmasmom - I have a similar experience with my DS, sometimes he wakes once for a feed, sometimes he is a bit more unsettled. I have never thought that he might be inferior for not sleeping through (something new to worry about!) - surely this is fairly normal or else where does the stereotype of knackered parents come from?

I have found that giving him a dreamfeed when I go to bed helps. Do you have other children? When I have had a bad night I make a point of sleeping (or a least lying down with my eyes shut!) whenever he sleeps during the day and it really helps but obviously not everyone can do this.

I read somewhere that anything over 4/5 hours should be considered as sleeping through for a baby so congratulations!

[emmabemmasmom]

Thanks everyone!

To answer some questions:
We have tried the dreamfeed before and it does not work with DD as she wakes and is all excited to see us so it could take a fwe hours to get her settled again. So we have a rule now not to wake her...ever!!
I do not have any others kiddies (can you tell haha) So even though I could lie down when she sleeps I usually just do chores, however going back to work this week so will not be possible

Just a brief note on last night: Bed at 7pm, woke at 9pm (needed to be settled) woke again at 10pm (DH fed her 180ml, all she takes at one time) woke at 3am (woulnd't settle so gave bottle, only had 60ml) then up for day at 7:30.

I do not mind feeding her, and I have no intention of trying to find 'the cure' lol. I really don't want to shove her with food during the day either...all I want is to know what to expect at night!! Is she gonna wake every 5 sec tonight, or sleep a good few hours?

When she was only 3 months she slept one night from 11pm to 8am...I was so excited I thought I had a magic baby...I even wrote it in her baby book. (HA, had to make some ammendments in book already)

Now every night is different and well...I guess thats it

Thanks everyone for pitching in ideas and helping me to see that my DD is normal

[Greedygirl]

ikwym re wishing they were a bit more predictable. If you think they are going to wake I think you tend to have one ear open and not sleep as well.

[seeker]

One of my favourite parenting writers is Libby Purves. She is very good on this unpredictabilty thing. I remember she said something about trying to think of her babies like the weather - just because it rained at 4.00 today it's no good expecting it to do the same thing tomorrow - and trying to predict and forecast weather is a frustrating and largely pointless exercise!

I liked to think of my babies as little animals - it helped me to stop thinking they were doing whatever thye were doing on purpose to annoy me!

[puffylovett]

alls i can say is - expect the unexpected, then you won't be surprised !!