[sad] being daft

[blondiep14]

I know i'm going to be told not to worry, but i need to tell people who will understand my neurosis!!

DS is 11 weeks on Wed and has never lost any weight, was 8lb 1oz when born and was 13lb 14.5oz last Monday. Today he had lost 1.5oz and i feel really upset!!

The woman at the clinic said to make sure i bring him back next week to make sure he's ok.

I do think he has been feeding a bit less because he has started to go thru the night (mostly, 10pm - 5am) and seems ok for longer between feeds in the day, say 3-4hours. Now i am worrying that i am not feeding him enough because he's sucking his thumb now maybe i'm not seeing all hungry signs he is giving me?

We also think he might be teething .

I have noticed less dirty nappies but tbh i have put this all down to him regulating himself now he is feeding less often. Now i am worrying i have been wrong not to worry...

He is still very smiley and happy in himself apart from his screechy time

[NotQuiteCockney]

1.5 oz is less than a good poo, it could be a normal variation (last week he was waiting to poo/wee, this week he'd just peed and pooed).

[blondiep14]

thanks, i feel better after the poo analogy!!

I must get stronger, I shouldn't let myself be worried by such things really but she always seems so shocked DS is exclusively breastfed that it makes me doubt myself.

He was in between the 75th & 91st lines, this week's weight has brought him right on to the 75th so guess it really is no biggie. .

still feel like i've been (unintentionally!) starving the poor bugger tho!!

[blondiep14]

I know, i have thought this, i don't think she is even a qualified HV, because she always aske the other one there. I need to time my drop in better so i get to the other one's queue!!

Mind you, the other one advised me to get a carton of formula in if i was too tired when DS was going thru a phase of feeding all evening...

[ShowOfHands]

And don't worry about missing hungry cues. If he's hungry, he won't be pacified by anything other than food.

Please try not to worry and be very proud of your healthy little baby. It's better to be lead by how he is, his nappy frequency (does settle down to fewer dirty nappies as they get older) and general well being than following a line in a book that he hasn't read.

You're doing a marvellous job.

[blondiep14]

only one in the area i'm afraid, and i'm pretty isolated as it is - did hope i might meet a few friendly people there.

[tiktok]

blondie - this blip on the scales could be caused by a slight and expected inaccuracy in the scales, or a poo/wee, or operator error on the scales....it is nothing and no one should make any clinical assessment based on one weight reading of a healthy baby of 11 weeks!!

Weekly weighing is too often for most babies, anyway.

If you think he needs more milk then just offer it more often, but that's only really to stop you worrying!!

[blondiep14]

Thanks all.

Always feel so much better after words of wisdom on here. I was very teary on walk back from clinic, now i feel absolutely tip top again.

Just changed his bum (only wet, but i'm not panicing - yet!!) and we had a lovely chat and laugh, he's definitely not unhappy!

[blondiep14]

Morning, Charlie hasn't had a pooh now since Sunday night. He seems fine and happy but should i worry, if not, when do i need to worry?

[blondiep14]

Just bumping to see if anyone can help re. the poo situation?!

[tiktok]

Starlight answered the poo thing, I thought....frequency gets less in many babies as they get older. I think the record on mumsnet is about 2 weeks

It's not an issue in a healthy, thriving baby at all.

When it comes, it is usually a whopper and goes all the way up through their vests and out at the neck

Which always makes me wonder about the line 'they use everything up with breastmilk', 'cos if it's been four days, it often looks like four days' worth!

[ReverseThePolarity]

My ds once went 17 days. Seriously. I started to go slightly mad thinking he was getting "no hind milk" ('cos you have to press a switch to get the hind milk, you know?) or even that he was constipated.

Anyway I was about to administer pure orange juice on a spoon when it happened of its own accord. My word. When it came, it came with the thunder.

Normally he went three to four days between poos when exc. bf though, so I don't know what was going on during those 17 days!

How I miss those poo-free nappies...

Can you stop getting him weighed so often? I stopped going all together after an HV told me to wean ds onto buttery and creamy foods as he was too skinny.

[blondiep14]

sorry, she did, you're right.

we did have an explosive out the neck jobbie last week but this is first time we've gone a whole day with nothing. Thought it would gradually dwindle rather than go from 6 to 0!

Plenty of wet ones tho.

How comes you can go thru one of the hardiest, hurtiest things ever in giving birth and instead of it making you a total empowered tough nut, you turn in to a jibering wreck and doubt everything you do?

Or is that just me??!

[PortAndLemon]

Is this your first?

IME second time round, while you don't necessarily feel that you know a great deal more, you are aware that everyone else is winging it too (no matter how calm and in control they may look) and so you reckon your best guess is as good as anyone else's and don't gibber so much .

[supercherry]

Blondie, this is exactly what I've gone through this morning so I can really sympathise! My DS was 7lb15 born and is now 14lb1 at 11 wks. Up to 2 wks ago was having really impressive weight gain Last 2 wks has put on 5oz a week. HV said to me this morning, 'you should try feeding him an extra 5 minutes on the breast', I explained he has been feeding pretty much constantly for last 2 weeks and his night feeds have increased (like having a newborn all over again!). I asked if 5oz was a poor weight gain and she said 'no' but to bring him back next week. Even though she said it wasn't a poor weight gain I am still worried. Also, the last few weeks, DS has only been having one dirty nappy a week, though it is a huge amount when it eventually surfaces - ha ha! I was advised on here not to worry about this for the same reasons Starlight and Tiktok have just mentioned. I think sometimes the Health Visitors give us reason to worry when there is no real cause for concern. I think I always come away from the clinic with something else to worry about. It's a nightmare. Anyway, sorry for the ramble, just wanted to say it sounds like your DS is doing great!

[NorthernLurker]

Your baby gained 5oz and she wants you to bring him back next week 'just in case'??? My personal view is that weekly weighing etc is fine if it reassures you - but if it causes you even fleeting anxiety then pack it in for a few weeks. I went every fortnight with dd1 - an april baby. With dd3 I think I have been 5 times in the last year. She was also an april baby - their birthdays are two days apart and that makes it very easy to compare weights. I've b/fed both and weaned at roughly the same times. They have always been within a couple of ozs of each other. To me that suggests you just grow the size of baby that you grow - I could have taken B to be weighed more often but it would'nt have made any difference. The thing about weighing often is that you tend to see every little drop and rise. If you go much less ofte you just get a better overall view - without the stress

[blondiep14]

He is my first, hence the over reaction i guess , still, we live & learn and i guess it's better to ask!

I think i was worried because he had been putting 7-8oz on a week then lost, but the woman at the clinic made it seem bad, then the HV asked about his nappies giving me something else to worry over!!

also they said i have to make sure i go next week as it's ok for him to lose one week but not 2 weeks in a row...

[PortAndLemon]

It's not an overreaction -- when a HV insinuates that there's something wrong with your baby it's normal to get stressed. I quit taking DS when I realised that I always felt worse after the baby clinic than I did beforehand (and mine were, by and large, nice HVs, and very useful when I knew there was something wrong with DS and needed to convince the GP of that) I think it's only by getting (in hindsight) unnecessariy stressed that you gain the experience to be more chilled next time .

[blondiep14]

Yeah, i think going every week is maybe not healthy for me!

But i thought i should go every week, and it might help me make friends...

It's hard this mummy business

[NorthernLurker]

Ok - re making friends have you found any mum and baby groups? In our city the NCT do a bumps and babes group that would be ideal for you. I also do a group with our church that you can come to with a baby a few days old (I was there with B at 5 days old) and then stay till they go to school The HV should be able to give you a list - or try the council? Roughly where are you in the country anyway?

[PortAndLemon]

Does your local library have a nursery rhyme session? Is there a mums-and-babies pram-pushing keep fit session in the local park? Those are good ways of meeting other mothers and making friends, and no one makes you feel like a bad parent...