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well i dicovered today that i am chuffin useless at discreet public bfing! need your tips/advice on what to wear!

31 replies

frazzledfairy · 06/11/2007 18:14

today we ventured into city centre to register 12 day old dd1, needed to feed her twice and made such a mess of it! when i say discreet i don't mean so no-one knows i'm feeding her, just don't want me boob/belly on show to all

i was wearing a vest top and cardi as i thought i would be able to hoick top up or down and cover dd with cardi while she latched on, but didn't have enough hands and had huge amount of post pregnancy tummy on show when top was up and huge amount of boob on show when it was down!

don't really want to resort to bf tops as they expensive, help!

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edam · 06/11/2007 18:19

Oh, I remember those early days well... I think it's entirely normal. Don't be embarrassed, both you and dd are learning (and it's more important to look after a baby properly than worry about any passers by - they are free to look somewhere else).

Anyway, I think a. it comes with practice and b. in the meantime, you could always take a muslin cloth out with you and drape it over your shoulder - some people find it helps (although I'd just get more bloody tangled up...).

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hunkermunker · 06/11/2007 18:20

Wear two vests. One goes up, the other down. Or buy a belly hugger thingummy. Will post link later.

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FioFio · 06/11/2007 18:21

This reply has been deleted

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TigerFeet · 06/11/2007 18:23

Belly bands, like the pg bands are handy, or a boob tube worn over your stomach.

I never seemed to flash all that much stomach, my norks have headed a long way south

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3Ddonut · 06/11/2007 18:24

Most passers by will avert their eyes when they realise what you are doing. You're probably showing less than you think you are, just don't wear a dress or anything with buttons! I find hoiking up a top to be the most discreet.

12 days is still very young and you will get more into a routine as time goes on, try not to worry and just enjoy baby and bf.

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annobalthebignosereindeer · 06/11/2007 18:26

Am also crap but i always wear a vest or singlet top underneath whatever i am wearing - i hoik up the t-shirt and pop my boob over the top on the singlet iykwim

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Mossy · 06/11/2007 18:26

Vest, or strappy dress, goes underneath bra. Then whatever top you normally wear goes over vest/dress.

Lift up top to bf.

I've given up caring though now though, and just tend to wear loose tops and pull down... given that no matter how discreet I try to be, ds always decides this is the best time to go on and off like a fiddler's elbow looking around and making lots of noise.

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frazzledfairy · 06/11/2007 22:08

thank you gonna have a look through wardrobe tomorrow and see if i can find some bf friendly outfits! and then practise before i face the public again

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oliveoil · 06/11/2007 22:10

mahooosive cardigan to cover belly

muslin cloth wafted over crook of arm, snugle babey in, then waft fabric over boob

glare at any tutters/smile at broody folk

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colditz · 06/11/2007 22:12

vest top under all. Vest top on top of that. Cardigan. Lift the uppermost vest top up, pull the lower one down. Wrap cardi over baby's head.

have seen this done very cleverly.

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squimlet · 06/11/2007 22:13

you are doing brilliantly. worry not about others. i am sure there are other things they can be looking at which are just as intresting.

plump for a baggy or stretchy top or tshirt. Take a muslin if you are a bit concerned at people peeping.

Sadly for everyone else I have/had no shame and didnt give a monkeys who saw me bf. Oddly enough if you smile at them they get terribly embarassed because they are looking at you.

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BroccoliSpears · 06/11/2007 22:13

Tops with deep Vs are good too - poppers half way down sort of thing. Vest underneath. Hoik vest up and poke boob through V - practically only a nipple out in the open, and that's LO's to deal with.

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nooka · 06/11/2007 22:16

I just used a shawl. Snuggle baby in position. Drape shawl over shoulder covering baby and lap, then open top - think I usually went for shirt type tops (doesn't affect non breastfeedng side, so no worries about inadvertant flashing!) pull down bra, latch baby on and then take shawl off (if you want). You will get better at it, and then the latching on bit takes less time and is less stressful.

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puppydavies · 06/11/2007 22:24

make sure your base layer vest is a nice snug fit then wear something looser over the top. i find if i have 2 loose layers they stick to each other and make it trickier. if you can afford just one proper bf top you could go for something like this that has a built-in bra as your base layer so you don't have to battle with bra as well.

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TheBlonde · 06/11/2007 22:26

I used those boob tube belly things - topshop do them for a fiver. Add a top that you can pull up and you are sorted

H&M do BF tops. Can't recall the price though

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weeonion · 06/11/2007 22:30

frazzled - congrats on yr newbie! goo don you for getting out and about and honestly - bf in public does get easier - you get the hang of it and your worries seem to go as well!

i am an advocate of cheap vest tops as bottom layer - pulled down with top layer pulled up. i also invested in some v v cheap boob tubes that i wear under my bra band to hide saggy tum.

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JoanWilder · 06/11/2007 22:32

ponchos, (nice ones in matalan,) big cardies, scarves, floaty floaty etc,,,I always flashed loads of nipp, just thought bugger it, in the end. only had a prob with one very odd male waiter who hovered (sp?)
around me, blatantly trying to see, until my dad told him to piss off!!!

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JoanWilder · 06/11/2007 22:34

lol squimlet at smiling back!!! tis true.>

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pukkapatch · 06/11/2007 22:35

normal clothes. nursing bra, and a shawl/blanket type thing. once baby is lacthed on, cover her up and your shoulder up with the shawl/blanket/scarf type thing.

you do NOT need special clothes. well, except for the nursing bras that is.

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moonstruck · 06/11/2007 22:39

AS has been said, I used a poncho or muslin or something. I felt that everyone was trying to catch a glimpse of how droopy my boobs were when I first started b/f in public! Hang in there(ha ha!)It does get easier or maybe you stop caring.....

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Maggieb52 · 06/11/2007 22:40

I know how you feel. Please try www.scrummy-mummy.com There is a busy baby wrap/poncho which is fab and I used mine all the time feeding baby. It does not matter what you wear underneath and it's not too heavy/warm for bf indoors. Nobody even notices you are feeding with this one. Just recommended to another mumsnetter
www.scrummy-mummy.com/busy-baby-breastfeeding-nursing-wrap-poncho-c-31.html

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moonstruck · 06/11/2007 22:53

Or try a sling, they can be very discreet

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dal21 · 07/11/2007 03:01

ohhh, i like that poncho. much easier than keeping shawl in place with wriggling/ squirming bub!

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OverRated · 07/11/2007 03:14

I vote for 2 vest tops too - one to hoik up while you pull the other one down - that way nothing is exposed.

Good luck!

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monkeybird · 07/11/2007 09:43

2 vest tops - genius! why didn't I know this before with babies 1&2 instead of just DS3?!!



Have been using lovely pashmina shawl given to me by my sister thus far but will dig out large collection of cheap Tescos and Topshop vests from now on... Will save lovely pashmina from being used as backup muslin and becoming too solid with baby sick

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