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Weaning boob obsessed 12 month old

(8 Posts)
Maddyde Sun 19-Jul-20 20:17:54

Hi everyone,

I’m in need of major help! I’ve got to the point where I cannot stand breastfeeding anymore and I really would love to stop. I used to love it and would encourage everyone to breastfeed and still would as me and my daughter have such a strong connection but I’m just exhausted from it. DD is 12 months.
I’m going to Italy in September to visit family and I would love to be fully weaned by then.

People have suggested either gradual weaning or cold turkey. Cold turkey seems a bit extreme as I’ve had mastitis before and really don’t want it again but more than that I think it’s a bit unfair to just stop all of a sudden like that as she won’t understand why! Gradual weaning is proving difficult as because we don’t have a feeding schedule, dropping a feed one by one is a bit impossible as some days she feeds loads and the next not so much.
To be honest it depends on us being at home or out the house. At home she has free access and out she’s too busy to bother.

The nights are the problem though. I do not sleep, and neither does she! I’m getting so snappy and fed up with it.
Every 1 and 1/2 to 2 hours she wakes needing my boob to comfort her to back to sleep - she’s not really taking any milk.

Problem is .... I’ve got no clue where to start. Asked my health visitor and she said to offer water instead. She actually threw her cup away and was fuming at me!! I don’t know what to do? Do I just let her scream and cry until she falls asleep again?

Note as well - she hates formula. Tried in bottles, sippy cups, off a spoon... nothing. She spits it out and makes a funny face.
She’s tried some whole milk also but we’re still going with it as she’s not too sure as why would she want that when she can have my breast milk when she wants, there’s no kidding her! 😩

I’m hoping someone might be able to give me a little more in depth advice than just offer water as I’d really like to write down a plan and get started with this weaning business! I’m ready to have my body back now!

Thanks so much I’m advance!!

OP’s posts: |
Lalanbaba Sun 19-Jul-20 22:18:42

We did the water offering and my little one did the same. Threw the cup and screamed like I was killing her.
I kept to it and it lasted 2 nights. (which we barely slept) but at the 3rd she seemed to get it. Sipped a bit of water and managed to go to sleep.
Does your little one fall sleep on her own for naps? Maybe try your partner to get her to calm her at night as if she smells the milk on you it will only upset her.
Good luck is a tough time

LoveWillOvercome Sun 19-Jul-20 22:43:02

No real advice as in a very similar situation with a bottle refusing boob monster. However, we have cracked night weaning and now just need to do the rest.

To night wean we moved him into his own room (a double mattress on the floor). I would feed to sleep and then my husband would sleep with him/ do all wake ups. After a few nights he stopped waking and now, usually sleeps through. Sometimes he wakes about 4/5am so I go in and feed him and just sleep in there till he wakes. I want to stop this though. He also goes all day without a feed when at nursery so I know he can do that too although he sometimes has a breakfast feed and definitely feeds after nursery as he only sips water (and mainly throws the cup too).

My plan is to give him a feed downstairs and then get husband to get him to sleep and do all wake ups. Then, once getting him to sleep is easy and he's sleeping through, drop the evening downstairs feed. Then drop the breakfast/ before nursery feed and then keep him occupied at weekends/ my days off work so he's not having any day time feeds at all.

I'm hoping he starts drinking something else because he has to. My daughter was the same but was better with a cup by now.... one thing he will drink from more than others is a bottle of water with a sports bottle top...

Maddyde Sun 19-Jul-20 23:13:15

Hey @Lalanbaba Recently shes started falling asleep by herself for naps so I guess that’s a start!

I think I’ll have to stick with it with the water then and just let her cry it out till she gets used to it! I’m such a softie and I give in but definitely have to stick with it. Just me during the night as my partner works crazy hours so I’ll have to try and wrap up to stop her smelling the milk!

Thank you so much for the advice. Think I’ll give it a go tomorrow night, fingers crossed.

OP’s posts: |
Maddyde Sun 19-Jul-20 23:33:38

Hi @LoveWillOvercome Thanks so much! Night weaning’s the bit to sort out first then it seems. Maybe then I won’t find the day feeds such a drag as well. My partner can’t help during the night due to the hours he works so it’ll be just me battling this one ahhh! But I’ve just got to be strong and say no. Know it will be a nightmare at first but like you said after a couple of nights they get used to it don’t they.

Oo good idea about the sports bottle cap, I wouldn’t have thought of that. It’s strange as my daughter loves water during the day and will drink it from anything! I’ll have to experiment with different bottles at night and see how it goes.

Good luck with the morning and before bed weaning!! Your plan sounds like a good one. Hopefully I can do similar too.

I’ll let you know if I have any revelations or breakthroughs! xx

OP’s posts: |
Whoopsies Thu 23-Jul-20 13:27:32

@Maddyed having any luck with the night weaning? I'm in exactly the same position with my 11.5 month old so need to sort it out. I've got to the point where if I don't nightwean him I'm giving up bf so together, when really I would like to continue with 1/2 feeds a day.

Maddyde Fri 24-Jul-20 21:35:30

Hey @Whoopsies it’s so difficult isn’t it! Such a rollercoaster of emotions as well. Us mums deserve some sleep!
There have been no miracles but I do think I’m getting somewhere and I’m not feeling like I’ve lost the will to breastfeed now, so we’re getting somewhere.
I‘ve cut down the day feeds to 3 - one in the morning in bed, super quick one at lunch (I think this one will be really easy to drop soon) and then one before bed. I’ve switched to doing the bedtime one in the living room before taking her into the bedroom. I then put her down drowsy but awake in her cot and let her fall asleep without feeding. If she woke before midnight I’d give her milk but cut it down to about half the time as usual. Then after midnight if she woke I’d just cuddled her back to sleep - she wasn’t as bad as I thought and only a bit of crying and moaning but no screaming. Think I’m waking up more than usual to cuddle her but at least we’re getting there without milk. I’m not even offering her water as I think that just made her remember that I’m not giving her milk.

During the day i’m trying really hard to distract her. I bought a bubble machine and a few musical instrument toys so when she starts pawing at my chest, I just distract her with something and it’s been working a treat. I’ve also really upped the snack game for between meals. I make sure I’ve got loads of things at the ready and it’s been making a difference.

Good luck!! Let me know how it goes smile

OP’s posts: |
Whoopsies Mon 27-Jul-20 09:38:42

Hi, sounds likely going well. I decided to give it a good go and it's gone really well so far. Ds didn't feed to sleep so could already self settle well, but was just waking 3 times a night for a feed!! So the first night he woke at 10 and I just cuddled him/carried him around and intermittently tried to put him back down in the cot until he finally gave in and went back down and back to sleep about 12. There was no crying as long as I was cuddling him! He then woke at 5 30am so I treated that like morning to save having to cuddle him for hours again! The second night he did the same from 11-12 30 and again 3 30-5, then up for the day at 7. Last night was the third night and he went to bed at 7 and slept through without a peep until 7 this morning!!! I can't believe it! I'll always get up to cuddle him in the night if he wants it, but the feeds have definitely gone!

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