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Infant feeding

If you're having problems bfing and you're wondering whether or not to phone a breastfeeding supportline...

49 replies

hunkermunker · 06/08/2007 16:04

Do.

The women on the other end want to help you. They're trained to help you and what's more, they'll get satisfaction from helping you.

So there

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Trinityrhino · 06/08/2007 16:06

here here

very well said hunker

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purplemonkeydishwasher · 06/08/2007 16:07

awww hunkster.
so glad you are back!

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hunkermunker · 06/08/2007 16:13

Thank you!

The numbers of the helplines are in my profile and also here:

Breastfeeding Network 0870 900 8787

NCT supporter line 0870 444 8708

La Leche League 0845 120 2918

Association of BF Mothers 020 7813 1481

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Boco · 06/08/2007 16:13

When dd1 was 3 months old i went on holiday to Cornwall - dd started refusing to feed and would just scream, it went on for a couple of days, i got painfully engorged and frantic.

Called nct who were amazing - the woman i spoke to got in touch with someone else who met up with me, spent an hour helping me to get dd to feed, lent me a pump which i could take away with me and send back when i returned to London. Turned out dd had an ear infection and her eardrum had burst. The bf counsellors were amazing - made all the difference.

Not sure why i'm waffling about this, but the point is, it's a great thing. Yes.

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Olihan · 06/08/2007 16:14

Definitely do it. I spoke to a lovely woman on the NCT line during my 3rd pg, as I'd failed at bf twice before and wanted to do everything possible to make it succeed. She gave me the no.s of 3 bfcs in my area as well as giving me lots of reassurance. The local lady I spoke to after ds2 was born was great and came to see me as well. 7 months on, I'm still bfing.

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VeniVidiVickiQV · 06/08/2007 16:15

Yes. If in doubt, ring.

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expatinscotland · 06/08/2007 16:15

Phoning a helpline saved my bfing DD2. The councillor came over to our place and got me sorted - baby just wasn't opening her mouth wide enough, which I didn't realise.

Such an easy fix!

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northender · 06/08/2007 16:15

Well said hunker

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Aitch · 06/08/2007 16:16

although without wishing to be negative, if you're at the end of your tether and the message you hear is 'the women on here do this voluntarily so they they are very busy and if they don't pick up, you will have to phone back later... clunk, bbrrrr' then it can be very depressing.

so give some consideration to getting dh to call until you do get through to someone. i called twice, got that message twice, and never rang again.

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hunkermunker · 06/08/2007 16:20

Well, yes, I'm sure there will be negative tales, as with anything run by humans (don't talk to me about JJB Sport, for instance, on a lesser yet still utterly eye-poppingly angering level).

I was prompted to start this after a thread I saw today (and others I've seen in the past) where women don't ring because they feel they're bothering the bfcs.

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Aitch · 06/08/2007 16:38

can i be brutally honest, though? that is how that message made me feel. hence my advice to get dh to call until you get through to someone. it's a particularly pissy message, they really should change it. it made me want to ring them back and tell them to fuck off and take their bfing line with them. [not v rational at the time]

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Aitch · 06/08/2007 16:40

i'm not trying to put anyone off calling though, far from it. the poxy NCT message doesn't have a bearing on the quality of support that i'm sure is available when you actually get through.

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hunkermunker · 06/08/2007 16:41

Which line did you ring? NCT? Isn't there a "press one if you're in distress" option on there? [hazy recollection]

And yes, course you can be honest! Did you email them and tell them how you felt?

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Aitch · 06/08/2007 16:54

it was an NCT line, yes, i'm pretty sure. it was an NCT person who gave me the number. i'm sure the message said somehting along the lines of 'this line is staffed by volunteers and all of them are busy right now so please ring back.' which of course i heard as 'people, out of the goodness of their own hearts, are trying to help you but they have their own families to feed so there's no one here to help you right now. please ring back and take your chances another time'. if there had even been an opportunity to leave a message...
didn't email, didn't complain, just wept.
hence my 'get dh to try first' line.

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JARM · 06/08/2007 18:45

Can I ask a question about these lines, how do they help "over the phone" and if they send someone out, how much does it cost?

Im asking because with 2 failed attempts at BF due to lack of support and not knowing what the hell to do, I really want it to work with this baby.

What do you actually say when you call? "erm, hello, i cant get this BF thing to work properly?"

Im so confused by the whole thing, and just cant afford the proper classes and councellors to help me.

Thanks if you can answer my silly questions!

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Pruners · 06/08/2007 18:59

Message withdrawn

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VeniVidiVickiQV · 06/08/2007 19:00

They arent silly questions at all.

TBH, how you've just said it is fine. They are there because they want to help, so nothing is silly or trivial to them.

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Boco · 06/08/2007 19:02

It doesn't cost anything. First they just chat to you, try to find out what the problem is. The first time it was giving me lots of ideas of how to get dd to feed, tried lots of their suggestions, and when nothing worked the woman met up with me, spent an hour showing me different positions, showing me how to hand express, calming me down!

With dd2 i called because she never latched on properly, kept sucking in air, she just gave me lots of ideas for things to try, which i did, and also offered to come and watch me feed to see if she could think of anything that might help.

If you're struggling in the early days it's ok to just call with all those niggling questions. If it's not working at all, someone will chat to you, give you some suggestions, and if there's someone who lives close and can manage it they'll often come and see you. They don't charge you.

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moondog · 06/08/2007 19:06

I think the dh thing is a good point actually Aitch.
Something like that message could break you at a vulnerable time.Far easier for dh to ring then hand the phone over (aah,feeling all emotional at thoguh of a lovely dh phoning like this...)

JARM,that comment would be fine.As counsellors they are trained to pick out form your discussion the important bits.Succeeding at breastfeeding definitely not about affording classes and counsellors.

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JARM · 06/08/2007 19:09

Thanks all.

I just hope I can manage it, and MN will be there for me when I need them.

Arghhhhh..... the whole thought of it is scaring the living daylights out of me, yet its the most natural thing in the world!

16 weeks to prepare myself!!!

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moondog · 06/08/2007 19:39

JARM,if I can give you a tip,would suggest you don't get the formula in 'just in case' as you did last time.

Have faith in yourself and your body.

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Peachy · 06/08/2007 19:43

Quite right Hunker

I was too shy to call with ds1 (in my defence he s struggling at 4 weeks over the millenium weekend, so people were on holiday)- result: formula

Called with ds3- suggested babymoon- result: still BF until 16 months

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Peachy · 06/08/2007 19:45

JARM what would you say if you called me? Hi, just wondered if you cold help...

because I was going to trian for the ABm after I did the babyfriendly breastfeeding thing, only reason I didnt was Uni happened.

really, its as simple as that. women on the phone who ahd an ineterest and fancied helping people. All mums themselves, all who BF themselves

(and they do quite a lot of training on communication too so shyness is OK LOL)

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JARM · 06/08/2007 19:55

Moondog- you are so right, and im not doing it. Im not even going to buy bottles or a steriliser before baby is born.

If necessary, I will have to make the effort to go out once baby is here, but god I hope it never happens.

I know i didnt give it my best shot with Becca, and I feel so guilty for that because I know I could have done it.

Hoping that as this is a boy, he is as taken with the boob as much as DH is!

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choolie · 06/08/2007 20:03

I did ring NCT and had a negative experience - not to put people off doing this, but it actually nearly put me off continuing BF altogether (I hadn't found MN at that stage and wish I'd tried this first!). the woman who answered sounded like I'd disturbed her afternoon TV viewing, had a really superior manner and almost laughed at me as if my question was stupid. I was actually in tears when I came off the phone and hadn't even asked everything I'd wanted because she made me feel ignorant and like I wasn't worthy of speaking to her. She talked down to me as if I knew nothing, and actually I'd just needed a bit of moral support - when you're sleep deprived in the early days you don't remember everything you might have read once.

I'm sure this was the minority and no doubt there will be posts to say the exact opposite, but I also sent an email to the contact listed for my area and never heard anything back. (sorry to be negative about this and I'm sure it won't have been a reflecion on NCT just this particular woman).

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