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Traumatic birth breast feeding

(10 Posts)
sh13 Sat 08-Jun-19 16:58:48

Looking for some advice from mummy’s ...

I had a horrendous birth last week had a big bleed then horrificly painful drip induction followed by baby getting cord stuck on face and nearly died so had EMCS , I then spent a week on a ward with a bad infection (sure some of you know wards are like-torture ) it makes me want to cry thinking about it all but obviously I will try an get some support with this....so during this past week I have had very minimal sleep ,for the actual birth I was up over 48 hours straight an then I only got 1 hour a night - due to feeding changing etc and the noise of the ward. Once I got home I got 6 hours of sleep, but then sent back into hospital last night so again 1-2 hours sleep. thing is I’ve tried sooooo hard to breastfeed and I loved feeding my baby at first but I’m seriously struggling with the lack of sleep and ending up in tears in the middle of the night thinking I can’t carry on like this and there’s no way out , I can’t safely stay awake feeding him due to my tiredness and the beds in hospital not safe for co sleeping . I know I am going home now but I am still very unwell so breastfeeding still taking it’s toll.

I love my baby so much but feel like I’m not enjoying him as much as I could be ...I feel like breastfeeding is the only thing from my birth plan that I can keep and I really don’t want to give it up , but then on the other hand I’m thinking should I stop as I need to recover so much an let dad do some FF maybe one or two bottles in the night ?

everyone has commented how he’s a sucky baby , I’ve given him a really good dummy and he’s taken too it although I know your not meant too but he won’t settle otherwise.. the guilt is killing me. So just asking for some combi feeding advice and my main worry is my supply
Of milk disappearing ?

my baby is one week old today , sorry for the long story just wanted to give background .

Any advice really appreciated x

OP’s posts: |
Jellybean100 Sat 08-Jun-19 17:02:15

Can you pump? It might take a day of your partner giving FF whilst you pump to get a bit of stock up. Even if he does every other feed overnight you should still get a few hours in. You must pump if you’re going to combi feed otherwise your supply will diminish pretty quickly at this early stage. The reason baby feeds so often at the start is to get your supply up so you need to match that with a pump to tell your body your baby is hungry x

Jellybean100 Sat 08-Jun-19 17:03:02

Also look at paced bottle feeding to reduce the chance of teat confusion. I’ve found nuk and medela teats to be the best

TotheletterofthelawTHELETTER Sat 08-Jun-19 17:09:55

You could give your baby formula from a cup, the midwives did that for me after I struggled to feed after a horrendous birth.

Another time a midwife sort of milked me while another midwife syringed up any colostrum that came up and then syringed it into DD’s mouth. They did that a few times (I sat there crying and felt humiliated but thought I had to do it for DD).

Either of those would help while you’re so exhausted and the “milking” would keep your milk from drying up.

But if you want to give your baby formula that is ok. It might not be what you wanted or planned but it is fine. I understand you saying that you feel like it’s the one thing from your birth plan you could keep to, it’s one thing you’re in control of after all that horrible stuff. But if keeping to it upsets you and baby, what’s the point? Make the decision for your sanity and baby’s tummy. You would not be a failure if you ff. flowers

sh13 Sat 08-Jun-19 17:10:17

Thank you I don’t currently have a pump I may order one on amazon prime what do you think of this x

www.amazon.co.uk/gp/aw/d/B07F2C2V6X/ref=cm_cr_arp_mb_bdcrb_top?tag=mumsnetforu03-21&ie=UTF8

OP’s posts: |
sh13 Sat 08-Jun-19 17:15:24

@TotheletterofthelawTHELETTER

Thank you so much ❤️ When you say the midwife hand expressed you , is this easy to do ? May look into it. Did you manage to keep up breastfeeding? I will take that on board about FF, appreciate that thank you . It’s hard not to feel like a failure.
I’m sorry you had a horrible birth too flowers x

OP’s posts: |
Sunshineonleith12 Sat 08-Jun-19 17:22:00

I combination fed as my DS didn't latch on until day 5. I continued with 1 evening bottle (formula) and bf the rest of the time. Plenty of women do this either through choice or circumstance and manage fine. Giving your baby a bottle does not mean the end of breastfeeding. Your milk supply will reduce slightly if you incorporate formula but in my experience it caused no issue with supply the rest of the time. I felt combination feeding allowed me to continue with breastfeeding far longer. The first few weeks are so tough but it does get easier. Whatever you decide you and your baby will be fine. Good luck x

TotheletterofthelawTHELETTER Sat 08-Jun-19 17:30:13

the Technique literally seemed to be like milking a cow 😂 midwife just sort of pushed and pulled my breast back from the nipple while another one syringed.

I only managed about 2 weeks of breastfeeding. I had a 4th degree tear and post-partum haemorrhage. The techniques I described above were used when I was in hospital recovering. I got all set up and sent home breastfeeding thanks to the perseverance of my midwives. However, I ended up back in hospital after 10 days needing another blood transfusion and I had to stop after that. I probably could have muddled through again like just after birth but I was so exhausted/ill that I chose to FF. and for us, we never looked back. It wasn’t what I’d planned but DD thrived. She’s 9 now and it’s all just memories now.

TotheletterofthelawTHELETTER Sat 08-Jun-19 17:31:12

A pump sounds like a good idea too. Probably better than hand expressing.
You’ve got this x

Seeline Sat 08-Jun-19 17:36:01

I combi fed from the start with my first. He was tube fed in SCBU for the first few days, and l had a really bad birth, needed transfusion etc. I started bf after he came off the tube, but had low supply so MW recommended formula top up. We mixed fed from then on until 6 months, usually DH giving a bottle during the night, and as he got a bit older another in the afternoon. We also used a dummy from very early on with no problems.

Also to put your mind at rest, I never had any problems with my second and bf for 15 months (she wouldn't take a bottle, formula, or cow's milk).

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