I am so annoyed. I breastfeed. I have done both children. Currently feeding my 3 month old. People know I breastfeed, I breastfeed in public when I need to, but I don't like people noticing, if you see what I mean. I have ridiculous Dolly Parton breasts when feeding, and I spend a lot of time making sure my outfits when I'm around others are incredibly discreet because I feel so embarrassed by my enormous boobs. I don't care if they see me feeding, I do care if they see my boobs.
The other day I was relaxing at home with the kids and my husband was playing around with his new camera. I was feeding the baby and was totally not discreet. Full boob out, not subtle in any way. Because I was at home and safe and comfortable. My husband took a couple of pictures and I said in a joking way "those better not end up on facebook". Hahaha how we laughed, he KNOWS how I try to be discreet in public.
Then this evening he sends a bunch of photos he's taken to his family on their family whatsapp group including the one of me with my whole boob out. I hate it. I hate that it has been seen by others. He's deleted it but it's still on anyone's phone that had already downloaded it. Or anyone who has seen it already has seen it even if it is deleted.
Ugh. I'm so annoyed. It makes me want to go and buy formula and a bottle so that my body isn't there for anyone else to see again. Or to only ever feed shut away on my own in a room. Why bother trying to be discreet in public when my naked breasts are going to be sent round to people anyway.
It's not even like it's a subtle picture with the baby's head covering most of my boob. It was proper lazy feeding with him lolling on my lap and you can practically see my nipple in his mouth and the whole of my boob except the bottom few cm is fully on display.
I don't want to see anyone in his family now as I'm so ashamed they've seen me like that. I don't want to feed my baby around anyone, including around my husband.
How the hell can I feel better about this? (I know...it's just a boob...but it's mine and I was so careful and am so embarrassed by them anyway )
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Infant feeding
Argh. So annoyed. Breastfeeding but ARGH.
10 replies
Frustratedwife · 22/01/2019 21:05
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