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End of breastfeeding?

(32 Posts)
tiredmoma Sun 09-Dec-18 20:50:56

This is a long one!!

Lg is 4 months breastfeeding has been full of problems jaundice, TT, reflux, CMA & now bottle preference i had stopped for 2 weeks when she was 5 weeks as i was having issues and i seriously couldn't cope anymore but missed it soo much and lack of help around the CMA i thought id try and feed again to help her but ever since (11 weeks ago!) she boobed before each bottle and bedtime but despite me trying to cut the bottles down (pace feeding, smaller bottles, boobing more) she would rebel against me and fuss at the breast and want more bottle. This week has been the worst! We both have had the cold and she has been less and less interested in boob i have really tried but you would think i was trying to feed her poison she screams until she gets the bottle. I don't seem to get on well with expressing (used too before i stopped!) ive tried manual 2 different types and electric im lucky if im able to get half an oz out of both breasts ive tried pumping a few times a day and i would pump more but its hard when she is awake and between daily life ive started taking fenugreek while ive noticed my boobs more tingly but not any more milk! And today her lasted thing is when i feed her she will slabbers all over the nipple take a few sucks and comps down and pulls really hard which of course hurts im really at a loss ive orders some tubes to try a SNS but i really this really is the last thing i can try im not ready for this im absolutely HEARTBROKEN i fell useless and if im not crying im fighting back the tears which tbh isnt new but ive spoken to my hubby but seems to have went over his head as he keeps telling me to smile, cheer up or he keeps fussing giving me hugs all the time (i know hes trying to help)

No real point of this really i just needed to get it out there as i really dont know what to do anymore part of me says pack it all in there is no point fighting it anymore and just accept my bfing is over but the other part just will not accept it

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JiltedJohnsJulie Sun 09-Dec-18 20:55:05

It sounds as if you’ve had a really rocky start. Are you getting any RL help with the relactaion

I really would suggest speaking to a BFC this evening. If you’re not in touch with one, I’d call one of the Bfing Helplines. Have you got the numbers?

tiredmoma Sun 09-Dec-18 20:57:26

Are there any i could speak online with as i dont think i could speak without crying tbh

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Changeymcchangechange Sun 09-Dec-18 21:00:38

The national breastfeeding helpline offer a web chat service, but I'd really encourage you to call them, they have a lot of experience and have dealt with all sorts of calls https://www.nationalbreastfeedinghelpline.org.uk

JiltedJohnsJulie Sun 09-Dec-18 21:04:19

There are a [[https://www.laleche.org.uk/submit-help-request/ couple that offer online support[] but I think you have to wait upto 48 hours and you sound as if you need urgent help.

Please don’t worry about crying, I’m not a BFC but I can imagine they are pretty used to exhausted and stressed Mums crying thanks

The numbers are here. Coukd DH look after her for a bit while you make the call? Please press the option for urgent help, you need more specialised support than an online forum will be able to provide thanks

JiltedJohnsJulie Sun 09-Dec-18 21:08:10

Sorry about the link fail. The LLL online support is here.

tiredmoma Sun 09-Dec-18 21:23:46

Thank you so much

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JiltedJohnsJulie Sun 09-Dec-18 21:28:29

I really, really would urge you to call though rather than the online help thanks

tiredmoma Sun 09-Dec-18 21:49:55

Ive just tried to couple of numbers they are closed 😢

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JiltedJohnsJulie Sun 09-Dec-18 21:54:24

Can you leave a message? Do you know the number of your local LLL Leader or a Local BFC?

tiredmoma Sun 09-Dec-18 21:54:46

Ill look it up

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MyKingdomForBrie Sun 09-Dec-18 21:58:01

I went to a bf support group when I was struggling with dd (tongue tie and so much nipple damage) and sat on the floor and cried all over the woman, her advice sorted me out though.

I'd ring your health visitor and find a group ASAP.

seven201 Sun 09-Dec-18 22:01:24

There's no shame in switching to a bottle.

Up to you whether you want to persist with the breastfeeding, but it sounds like it's causing you a lot of upset. Your baby has had months of wonderful milk from you.

I also combo fed due to a cmpa baby. She didn't regain her birth weight for over a month and I was pressured into giving her two formula feeds a day. We eventually managed to get it down to one bottle before bed but it was a mission. She never seemed satisfied breastfeeding but would guzzle a bottle of yucky fake milk, and still does at 2-5yrs. I assume you're completely milk free if you dc is allergic or is he/she (sorry can't see your op to see if boy or girl!) officially fine with your milk?

SurvivingCBeebies Sun 09-Dec-18 22:03:49

Hi, sorry to hear about your journey so far.. I just wanted to let you know a little about my circumstances to see if it could possibly help you. I exclusively express for my DD now, but started off bottle feeding due to delayed milk.

I've had supply and demand issues, whereby I've not expressed enough, and on these occasions I've FF, when this happens I have to increase supply by adding extra pumping sessions (getting up in the night etc) at minimum I now do 4 a day, but when low I do 6. I always massage when expressing and I've found that sometimes hand expressing for a little while can really help stimulate let down (when I can feel milk in the breast but the pump isn't cutting it) and then switch back to pump once the supply lets out.

I hope that it all works out for you x

AlfieTheRailwayCat Sun 09-Dec-18 22:06:38

The NCT number is manned until midnight. 0300 330 0700.

JiltedJohnsJulie Sun 09-Dec-18 22:13:21

There’s a list of Bfing Support Groups here smile

tiredmoma Sun 09-Dec-18 22:16:35

I got through yay!! She was very helpful thank you ladies for making me ring!! 😘

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Spam88 Sun 09-Dec-18 22:18:21

Ah glad you're sorted OP!

JiltedJohnsJulie Sun 09-Dec-18 22:21:14

That’s brilliant. Can I recommend getting along to your local BFing Groups too? [thanks[

JiltedJohnsJulie Sun 09-Dec-18 22:27:18

That’s if you’ve decided to continue BFing of course smile

tiredmoma Sun 09-Dec-18 22:30:02

I know there is no shame in bottle feeding when i was pg i was very open minded but i never thought breastfeeding would mean so much to me i am happy to combi feed as i have been im not just ready to give up feeding her just yet. Yes im milk free now too and tbh i dont miss milk at all and dont see why i didnt do it sooner as my dh is cma!! I know there is a group not too far away on tues ill make the effort to go only thing that puts me off going to this groups is incase i have to whip the bottle out!! @seven201 i agree why would you want the yucky fake rubbish when you can have the real deal!! @SurvivingCBeebies thank you i shall try upping the pumping and do some power pumping as well as massaging

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Changeymcchangechange Sun 09-Dec-18 22:49:27

I'm glad you got through and got some support smile there's no shame in bottle feeding at all but breastfeeding grief is real if you want to breastfeed and can't for whatever reason. Take care OP x

MyKingdomForBrie Sun 09-Dec-18 22:50:33

I think it would probably help to let go of some unhelpful ideas about formula though - it's not 'yucky fake rubbish', it really isn't. It is good food and makes happy healthy babies.

tiredmoma Sun 09-Dec-18 23:17:05

I feel alot better after speaking to someone and have a bit of hope!! thank you all for your help xx

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tiredmoma Sun 09-Dec-18 23:18:40

@MyKingdomForBrie and i know your right!!!

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