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Stopping breastfeeding

(17 Posts)
notanaturalmum Mon 09-Apr-18 22:05:27

So my son is 10 months now and I'm no closer to stopping breastfeeding. He will take a bottle but only if it's my milk. He will drink about 10mls of formula at best and then get really angry.
I'm done, I want to be able to go away for a weekend without having to express for feeds (which i can't do anyway cos I can only get about 40mls at a time)
Plus I start work in a month and can't be feeding on a morning, there just won't be time.
Any suggestions on how to stop?
I can't bear the idea of cold turkey. He gets so upset, I would feel really mean.
And when I mix my milk with formula, he doesn't drink it either.
So how can I do this. I don't understand why he won't drink formula.

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ThaiRedCurry Mon 09-Apr-18 22:08:40

I don't know if this is helpful but a friend of mine went away from the family home for the weekend so the baby had no choice but to take the bottle because she was hungry. I think by the Sunday morning she was swinging away on a bottle
Good luck xx

notanaturalmum Mon 09-Apr-18 22:15:12

Is it not a bit harsh on the people left with the baby.
We tried this a while back when I went on a work night out. Child refused aptamil and my poor husband had to persevere and then just rock him to sleep. He is still scarred from all the crying apparently.
I would feel mean inflicting that on someone.
What about mastitis - would I get that?

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AssassinatedBeauty Mon 09-Apr-18 22:16:16

Will he drink water from a sippy cup? And does he eat well? If yes, then you could go away for a weekend and he would be absolutely fine with water and food.

When you go back to work you don't have to feed in the morning, you could switch to when you get home from picking him up.

At 12 months you could try him with cows milk in a cup, and see if he prefers that to formula. No need to persist with bottles at that point.

ThaiRedCurry Mon 09-Apr-18 22:19:46

I wouldn't say so. You've put ten months into feeding your baby. 48 hours is the least they can do! (In my opinion)
It will be harder for you as you will miss your baby so much I'm sure. X

AssassinatedBeauty Mon 09-Apr-18 22:24:39

You'd be unlikely to get mastitis. You may want to express a bit to relieve any engorgement, if you miss several feeds. Your supply would be robust enough to cope with a weekend away at this point.

StephiD3 Tue 10-Apr-18 17:09:04

How many times does he feed a day approx?

I’m currently going on to bottles from breast but doing it slowly. Replacing a feed at a time.

How about trying a different brand of formula? Have you tried feeding it at different temps?

PurpleTygrrr Tue 10-Apr-18 19:20:56

I know you said you had tried mixing your milk with formula but have you tried doing it in tiny amounts and then increasing. So 1oz of formula to 4oz BM for a few days then increasing to 2oz formula:3oz BM for a few days and so on. That's what I did with my little girl, it took a few weeks and now she takes it no problem. Also, we use the hipp organic formula, I know it's not the same as BM but lots of people have said it's tastes the most similar and it's gentler on their babies tummy.

notanaturalmum Wed 11-Apr-18 14:55:53

Generally 3 feeds if I keep him distracted. 7am, post lunch nap and bedtime.
I'm trying to drop post lunch nap (about 3.30pm) but he gets upset and then cries during his dinner, through bath time and getting ready for bed.

I've tried all the brands, powdered and ready made. He hates SMA the least. I've had the most success with SMA ready made at room temperature. If I use powdered it has to be quite cold - the prep machine (waste of money) makes it too warm.

@PurpleTygrrr I can't express enough really to be doing ratios, and it's a waste if he doesn't drink it.

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notanaturalmum Wed 11-Apr-18 14:57:49

@PurpleTygrrr when you were weaning your baby, did you stop all boob and just do the express mixture for all feeds?

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PurpleTygrrr Wed 11-Apr-18 17:51:54

@notanaturalmum how many oz are you getting when you express? You could make up an oz and just mix half in and gradually increase. If you make sure you express at the same time of day your supply will gradually increase so you are able to express more.

We're not weaning yet- she's only 3 months old. Will probably introduce a daytime bottle at that point of just formula.

Isadora2007 Thu 12-Apr-18 12:13:48

You could manage a morning feed alongside working if you wanted to and a bedtime one, only leaving the afternoon one.
Have you tried warmed cows milk in a soft spout cup? He is nearly 1 so am sure that formula isn’t really necessary now- especially if you manage to continue breastfeeding now and then.
It would be kinder on your body and your son to cut down gradually rather than cold turkey- especially as he and you have a BIG change coming up of you working and him being left with others... so that BF continuing could be a really good help for you both to manage that more smoothly.

It sounds a bit like you want to run before you can walk- wanting a weekend away before you’ve managed an evening etc. So I’m wondering where that’s coming from for you? It definitely sounds like you need a wee bit of me time and some space to be you and not milk mummy... but try not to lump that all into the act of breastfeeding. You will still feel that tie to your baby and him to you regardless of the method of milk... and I wonder if it is that pressure you’re feeling is getting a little too heavy?
Stopping BF can sometimes be quite emotional too- a bit like mild PND or PMT type feelings so again at this point of going back to work May not be the best timing.

notanaturalmum Fri 13-Apr-18 07:09:38

There's a bit of truth I what you are saying. I'm fed up of being milk mummy and having to do bedtime every night.
We have been out on an evening occasionally but it takes me like a week to generate enough milk for the bedtime feed. So it's just not workable.
I planned the weekend away with the girls just after he was born - thinking I'd long have given up breastfeeding by 11 months. I really want to go and will be upset if I can't - it's what has kept me going.
It's 4 weeks away and I don't know what to do.

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Hmmalittlefishy Fri 13-Apr-18 07:15:54

I felt the same way and was much more ready to wean with dd3 than the others and she was definitely more attached. I would drop one feed at a time. So perhaps the lunchtime one as you won't be there once your back to work. I would give a snack instead of milk or formula in a sippy cup as an alternative but once decided stick to it and don't change your mind as it will make it worse for you both
Once that is done and set for a few weeks I would drop morning or night.
Fwiw dd3 flatly refused any kind of milk in any kind of receptacle from anyone unless it was from the boob and adament she will have nothing so now has no milk hmm she's a little older at 18 mths though

AssassinatedBeauty Fri 13-Apr-18 07:54:29

You can go away for the weekend, leave as much milk as is reasonable for you to express and then whoever is looking after him will have to manage! At 11 months he's going to be fine without milk for two days, if he takes water and food well.

You may well surprised by how well he goes to sleep for other people, when he knows you're not there.

April45 Sat 14-Apr-18 07:31:19

It sounds like if you're stopping now he'll have to go cold turkey.. but if there is a bit more time the process could be more gradual. At 12 months he can start having cows milk which he may prefer? You can start getting him ready by giving cows milk to taste now.

If you are sticking I'd stop that 3.30 feed, give a snack and water instead. Wasn't sure from what you wrote above if you're trying to cut out the nap too?

notanaturalmum Tue 17-Apr-18 10:16:32

Thanks all. He has cows milk on cereal anyway so I'm hoping he likes the taste.
Hit a new low today - couldn't express anything even whilst he was feeding on the other side.
Do you think I could mix cows milk and formula and feed him that?

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