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funniest breastfeeding in public stories (light hearted)

(10 Posts)
mammyoftwo Sun 28-May-17 20:11:40

With dc1 I was extremely nervous, and didn't start to bf in public until 22 weeks. On one occasion, I had a middle aged woman give me evil eyes, but other than that had pretty good experiences.

When dc2 came along, practicalities meant I was bf in public from two weeks, and have been managing well so far. But yesterday, I nearly laughed out loud at someone else's reaction....can anyone else relate?

The scene....we were in the city centre and needed to stop for pee/nappy change/snack break. So we headed to M&S, where there are toilets with baby changing facilities in the café (rather than up three floors via two different lifts to the regular shopping centre ones). The staff are usually helpful here eg bring extra glasses of water etc
I paid for our food and drink and we sat down. I got toddler sorted, and they were happily tucking into their snack (thankfully on best behaviour on this occasion!)
There was a middle aged couple sat at a perpendicular to us, therefore I could see the full interaction. When I arranged my clothes, lifted the baby (6 months), and put her on for a feed the woman at the table nearly choked on her scone. I KID YOU NOT!!! For a moment, I thought I was going to have to stop the feed, go over to her and do a few backslaps! She then cleared the bit of scone and was able to tell her husband what had shocked an exaggerated whisper, she mouthed to her husband "she's feeding her baby from her breast", all whilst using hand gestures to mimic lifting breast and putting a baby on to feed!!!! She continued to look over for cheeky glances to check if the baby was being breastfed. The husband appeared to dismiss her shock, just shrugged and didn't appear interested in discussing it (the table was right next to us, couldn't have not heard).

(for reference, I was being discrete, lifted a loose top up to feed baby, wearing a strappy top underneath. So no belly or booby was on show, baby's head covered nipple and areola)

I found the whole thing just comical, that breastfeeding could induce such a reaction of shock. Anyone had anything similar, that caused them to chuckle?

mammyoftwo Sun 28-May-17 22:31:00

shameless bump, now that handmaid's tale is over!

UserShmuser Sun 28-May-17 23:07:14

I've done the opening my front door with a boob out too many times to count.

Another M&S cafe experience...I was with my friend and her DD when my DS needed feeding, I think he was about one or thereabouts. I fed him and my friend went off to change her DD. DS got a bit fidgety so I put him back in the pram and sat back whilst I pushed him. There was an older man who had just sat opposite me and kept catching my eye but I thought nothing of it. His wife came and sat down and they had a little whisper. She then let out a high pitched shrieky laugh and turned to me. She walked over and leaned over the table and whispered "Dear, I think you ought to put your breast away now." DS had fidgeted so that my buttons had come undone and my bra had come down and my boob had flopped out. I hadn't even realised. She thought it was hilarious and even sent over a cake because I was so mortified.

NotCitrus Sun 28-May-17 23:59:21

I'd promised my 3yo we could see a certain film when it came out at the cinema, thinking I'd be 39 weeks and have a nice sleep. Turned out to have a 5 day old dd and figured it was still a good idea.

Dd slept for half the film, then woke and I managed to get her out of the sling to feed her, but while I tried to get her latched on in the dark, a jet of milk shot out and hit a small girl across the aisle, in her ear.

Poor girl got told off for squealing - I called across 'sorry, not her fault' but didn't really want to explain!

Managed to get DP in the face from about 12 feet, which was entertaining. He thought about building one of those fairground games with targets...

ClemDanfango Mon 29-May-17 00:06:52

I was feeding DD age 1 in my local library so really very quiet in there DD decided right at that moment to bob her head back and forth and use her nose to blow the loudest fartiest raspberries you ever heard on my boob! I was in fits of stifled laughter which of course only encouraged her more! I had to get up and leave 😂

Whitelisbon Mon 29-May-17 00:13:14

Sitting in a restaurant, feeding dc5, who was about 6 weeks old ish, when an elderly gentleman walked past, stopped, asked about "the baby" - the normal stuff, name, how old, is she good, etc.

He then patted her on the head, then bent down and gave her a little kiss on the top of her head, then wandered off to join his wife, who was sitting a couple of tables away.

I was a bit shocked by the kiss, seeing as if he's been any closer, he could have latched on, but, before I could really react, I saw his wife lean over to him and his something, at which point he went bright red, turned to look at me, and went even redder.

His wife came over, trying not to laugh, and apologised, and told me he hasn't realised I was feeding her, and he was very very sorry. The poor man was almost hiding under the table with embarrassment by then!

I accepted their apology, still feeling a little shocked, then discovered, when we went to leave, that they'd paid for our meal as an apology.

I got halfway home, then just pictured the look on the poor man's face when he realised what he'd done, and had to pull over into a layby as I was laughing so hard I couldn't see.

FuckyDuck Mon 29-May-17 00:31:17

I was out for lunch with DD when she was around 3 months old (2 weeks corrected) and she woke up in the car ravenous. I had to pull into a lay by and was just whacking a boob out when a police man came up to my window to ask if everything was ok. He'd seen me pull over a bit quickly and put my hazards on and wanted to check we were ok. He got a right eyeful!blush

Ratatatouille Mon 29-May-17 00:33:11

Whitelisbon 😂😂 Poor fella

TheQueenSnortsAvocados Mon 29-May-17 00:39:22

I was out having coffee with a friend, and started making the necessary adjustments to fees the baby. Friend sort of flinched, but says nothing. I was a bit surprised as her sister had been pregnant at the same time as me, and was also breastfeeding. I hadn't pegged this friend as an awkward or anti-breastfeeding type at all.

I ummed and ahhed about saying anything, but eventually cracked.

Turns out her sister liked to hide round corners and leap out to squirt her unexpectedly, and she was ever so slightly concerned I might do the same!

As it happenned I laughed so hard the baby popped off and I nearly did.

mammyoftwo Mon 29-May-17 00:40:28

I got halfway home, then just pictured the look on the poor man's face when he realised what he'd done, and had to pull over into a layby as I was laughing so hard I couldn't see.
gringringrinI'm literally crying now!!

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