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Is he not getting enough?

(19 Posts)
Aliveinwanderland Thu 19-Jan-17 02:37:08

My 12 week old DS is still waking to be fed every 2 hours at night, sometimes it's only 90 minutes and it's killing me. He has always been a short feeder and will do between 5-10 minutes and be done.

In the day time he can easily go 3 hours between feeds as he plays for 90 minutes and then will have a 2 hour nap at lunch time.

Why can't he go longer at night? Is he not taking enough at each feed to keep him going longer?

Notsleepingeveragain Thu 19-Jan-17 04:45:16

This is perfectly normal nighttime behaviour.

It is not really to do with taking more though some people try formula sleep feed at their bedtime to encourage a few more hours. I don't know if that helps.

Your baby is still so small. In another 12 weeks he will be on solids and its only really then that they start to sleep a bit better in my experience.

Tge next 12 weeks things will improve. I know it's exhausting

Notsleepingeveragain Thu 19-Jan-17 04:46:13

You could try feeding him every 2 hours in the day to see if that encourages him to go longer at night?

AmoIsNoLongerEmo Thu 19-Jan-17 04:55:52

Is he having enough dirty nappies? At his age he should be having about 4 or 5+ sopping wet and whatever is normal for him dirty nappies. (BF babies can go up to 10 days without a poo and be fine) Has he been gaining weight steadily? Also is this your second child? The more times you nurse the better your body gets at it, and will produce more milk and release it at a fast rate letting baby nurse faster.

AmoIsNoLongerEmo Thu 19-Jan-17 04:57:16

Also check his soft spot, it will be sunken in if he's dehydrated and not getting enough milk.

AmoIsNoLongerEmo Thu 19-Jan-17 04:57:46

Sorry for spamming!

Aliveinwanderland Thu 19-Jan-17 05:04:08

Weight gain is good and wet/dirty nappies fine.

We tried a formula feed before bed once but it was stressful getting him to take it and it made him so gassy he woke up anyway.

I know people say it's normal- but every other breastfed baby I know is doing at least a 4/5 hour stretch at night time.

I will try feeding him more during the day time but if he doesn't want it then he cries and won't take it.

Day time sleep isnt too bad. He naps for between 20 mins to 1 hour around 9/10am, usually has 2 hours around lunch time and then half an hour around 4 ish.

btmac Thu 19-Jan-17 05:12:20

My 5.5 month old still wakes to feed every 90 minutes to 2 hours. It's normal as far as I'm aware.

During the day there are plenty of distractions. Overnight less distractions AND your prolactin peaks between 2-3 am (the hormone that is related to milk production) so the milk flows well.

It's tough but eventually it should get better. I say should because my secret me child fed every 45 minutes overnight until he was 18 months old!

btmac Thu 19-Jan-17 05:13:02

Second child - auto correct.

AmoIsNoLongerEmo Thu 19-Jan-17 05:15:59

No babies are the same and won't all sleep for long periods of time at night. My DS is 2.5 years and still wakes up at least once a night. He woke up every couple hours while he was little too. My DD is about to be 4 and slept through the night on her own before she was 2. It's normal, I know it's rough on you but he's still so small he hasn't gotten a good sleep pattern yet. It'll come I promise! Just hang in there. Once he starts on solids he might get better at sleeping. But he's not just eating for nutrition he's also nursing for comfort.

Aliveinwanderland Thu 19-Jan-17 10:58:09

I'm just so tired. I know it's normal, but I don't want it to be! All my friends babies sleep for at least 4/5 hours and they are breastfed!

I will try feeding him more during the day time to make sure he is getting enough, it's hard to encourage him to feed if he doesn't want it though.

kippersandcurtains Thu 19-Jan-17 11:41:33

That sounds exhausting I don't blame you for feeling exhausted and stressed - it's relentless. When is his last evening feed? Is he awake for a couple of hours in the evening after his last nap? They do have growth spurts when they feed a lot more (and sleep patterns change often for the worse). Try not to compare with other babies - it'll only ever make you feel like a failure, or cross. Your son will come through this phase...
If you aren't already I might try to encourage a cluster feed from 7 for as long as he'll stay awake - and/or a 10-10:30 'dream feed' which we do and it does seem to work (dd is 7 weeks and ebf).
Having said all that it could be that your ds is struggling to fall back to sleep after his sleep cycle rather than be hungry and is just using nursing to get him back to sleep. Does he fall asleep feeding in the day? Perhaps try to minimise sleep props so he learns to self settle?
Sympathies op, it is tough. Hope you find a solution.

Aliveinwanderland Thu 19-Jan-17 13:42:16

He never falls asleep feeding the day and will only nap in the pram or car.

He is shattered by 6pm so we do feed at 5:30, bath at 6:30 and then feed again at 7pm. He goes straight to sleep after this with no problems and usually wakes at 10pm for the next feed. It is after this that he starts waking every hour!

Aliveinwanderland Thu 19-Jan-17 13:42:45

He is put down awake at 7pm and always settles himself to sleep.

Doolallylally Thu 19-Jan-17 13:46:11

Try your hardest to get him to feed more often during the day and don't let him have a long sleep. You want to encourage the longer sleeps at night. At night, when he wakes, don't change his nappy and keep the room dark.

Gradually he will start to sleep for longer periods at night but you can encourage this trend.

Aliveinwanderland Thu 19-Jan-17 13:55:52

I usually change him at the 10pm feed to wake him a little and encourage him to feed front the other side. I don't change him at any other feed though.

I will try and get him to take more during the day. How long should I let him sleep in the day? So far today he woke at 8:15am (had a 7am feed and went back to sleep) and napped from 10:30-11:15, 11:45-12:00 and then is napping now from going to sleep at 1:15.

Rollonbedtime7pm Thu 19-Jan-17 14:29:42

The thing is, and it's only hindsight of 3 babies that has revealed this to me, it's not all about hunger - a lot of the way babies sleep is just their biology. It sounds like he is having his "core" sleep between 7 and 10 (which is common - babies tend to have 1 longer sleep in 24hrs and it's this one that usually stretches to a full night) which is shit for you because you are still up!

I did exactly the same with all my babies, regular feeds during the day, boring quiet ones at night and they slept through at 11 months (DS), 3 1/2 years (DD1) and 7 months (DD2).

The night wakings became less about food and more about just needing to develop the ability to sleep for longer stretches.

This doesn't solve it for you I realise and it is so shit, I feel for you but hopefully you can feel a bit less like it's because of anything you are doing? Sometimes fighting it makes you feel worse (and I have totally been there - see DD1's sleeping age above!! grin).

Hope he settles soon.

kippersandcurtains Thu 19-Jan-17 16:36:47

Sounds like you're doing everything 'right' - the only alteration I might make (other than increasing feeds in daytime) is to get baby up at 7am and try to encourage wakefulness till more like 9-9:30, then shortish nap which ought to encourage a longer lunchtime nap. A short third nap at 4pm is usually the first to drop but useful to avoid overtired bedtimes. In my experience this routine is the most conducive to eventual sleeping through. Not that I'm an expert by any stretch!

seeingdots Sat 21-Jan-17 09:19:53

Totally totally normal! Try not to compare your baby with your friends. There will probably come a time when your baby goes longer whilst their's regress. Swings and roundabouts! Have you tried a few different bottle brands? Having your OH take one of the night time feeds while you sleep might make all the difference to you.

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