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Struggling with newborn breastfeeding!

(31 Posts)
TootsieBootsie Wed 28-Dec-16 19:49:02

My DD is 3 days and I'm struggling with breastfeeding!
Generally in the day she is ok but is getting more fussy when trying to latch on. She roots so I offer her boob, but she'll either not latch on and then scream or just latch on for a second then come off and scream. It's much worse at night and I gave in to formula last night as it got quite distressing and I was worried she was starving and I wasn't able to feed.
I've spoken to midwives about it and they aren't concerned at present....just wandered if anyone else has experienced similar? Any advice much appreciated!

Booboostwo Wed 28-Dec-16 20:23:17

Congratulations on the little one!

Do you know if your milk has come in? Was she latching better and now has more problems? Has she been checked for tongue tie? This can really affect the latch. Reflux can also cause pain which leads to babies refusing to latch on.

Can you access help in RL? It can be very helpful to have someone knowledgeable look at your latch and show you the exaggeratedly latch, different positions etc.

Namechanger5432121 Wed 28-Dec-16 20:30:26

Hi! Sorry to hear you are having problems already. As PP said, try to access RL support from either a baby brasserie (if you have them in your area) or NCT group?
Not sure if you are on fb but if you are, search for the group called Can I breastfeed in it - off topic. So many knowledgable mums on there with tons of advice!

Isadora2007 Wed 28-Dec-16 20:34:45

Part of the fussing and "raging "
As I called it- is to bring your milk in and is totally normal even though it's distressing. Please don't keep going to formula though as if your baby doesn't get the time sucking then your milk supply won't respond accordingly. A newborn baby's tummy is literally tiny so she won't starve honestly.
I would definitely try to get some actual face to face BF support. And you're doing fab so far. So well done.

smellyboot Wed 28-Dec-16 20:35:49

My DD was similar and had formula at 3 days to get fluid into her. She did eventually get the hang of BF but support for me from friends and a great MW... access help locally and get some one to sit with you and help. Do not panic. Do not get upset. Its actualy a huge advantage if baby can take both FF and BF !!!!

MooPointCowsOpinion Wed 28-Dec-16 20:39:28

Congratulations on the birth of your baby!
Establishing breastfeeding can take some effort and it can be a bit frustrating, but it's so worth it when you get past this difficult first bit.

It could be any number of reasons, but it's most likely nothing to worry about, just keep offering. In all likelihood your milk is about to come in for real and she needs to feed like mad to encourage it, frequent little feeds all through the day and night get the milk to come.

If you want you could lay side by side tummy to tummy so she has free access and can latch on and off as she wants, and you can doze.

mikado1 Wed 28-Dec-16 20:41:44

Agree with get real life support but I am going to say what I wish someone had said to me at 3 days on my first : all (for me anyway) you've described is very normal and it's not forever, this will not be your life forever more!! I think night 2-5 were like this and very quickly, once milk in and we got comfortable , things improved. Keep baby on you , font ve worried about getting them into Moses basket etc (this was my mistake), feed and keep them close and take a long, deep breath before every feed. I personally wouldn't substitute with formula at this early stage as it could sabotage things. Congratulations and well done so far!

AlbusPercival Wed 28-Dec-16 20:42:40

Three days in with DS was the worst day ever, all he did was scream.

Turned a curve on day 4 and now 7 weeks in bf is easy, hang in there and get local support

BlackSwan Wed 28-Dec-16 20:44:40

And if breastfeeding doesn't work for you - formula is fine. I persisted as long as I could, but less than 2 weeks in I threw in the towel. Thank God for formula.

mikado1 Wed 28-Dec-16 20:59:55

To be fair, a two week settle in time would be expected blackswan, so it's worth the op persisting at such an early stage, assuming she wants to bf, the hard graft of the first weeks are completely normal and ime, worth it.

PastysPrincess Wed 28-Dec-16 21:02:34

I really struggled with breastfeeding to start but ended up feeding him until 19 months so there is definitely hope.

It took about 4 days for my milk to come in but even when it did I couldn't get his latch right. It turned out he had a posterior tongue tie which was stopping him from latching properly.

In my area there are Sure Start centres which run breastfeeding groups. I would highly recommend getting support from real physical people.

Dont worry, babies only need a tiny amount of milk at this age. I did supplement with formula but only a very little amount and only when it was a last resort; however, we didnt use bottles, we used a technique called cup feeding. It means you can get some nourishment in them but you dont risk confusing them with a teat.

It really is so so hard and I nearly gave up so many times but you will get there!!

TootsieBootsie Wed 28-Dec-16 21:57:57

Thank you everyone, so glad I'm not alone. I was so upset giving bottle yesterday as I really want to bf as I failed at it with 1st baby, i was just was worried.
She has nipple in her mouth but just goes kind of frantic and won't latch....it's so difficult!
If I spend tonight having the same battle I'll go and see midwives tomorrow.
I've assumed she's been checked for tongue-tie, MW did the checks the day after.

mikado1 Wed 28-Dec-16 22:12:34

The good days will very quickly outnumber the bad. Good luck and definitely seek help sooner rather than later if concerned, I only to be told all is fine, that in itself is hugely reassuring I found: this is normal, teething problems etc, you will get there!

PastysPrincess Wed 28-Dec-16 22:26:00

Don't assume anything with tongue tie. It's not on the list of checks that are routinely performed. I had a huge battle getting my sons diagnosed; he was seen by 16 paediatricians, GP's, Midwives, etc. and they missed it because they aren't experienced in breastfeeding specifically.

Artandco Wed 28-Dec-16 22:30:13

Strip baby down to nappy and keep her skin to skin with you as much as possible also. Add blanket ontop to keep warm

Pobblewithnotoes Wed 28-Dec-16 22:38:13

With my first it felt like I had to wrestle him on for the first 9 days. It was agony for the first two weeks but I persisted and carried on feeding for 15 months. Even with my second I still hated the feeling for the first two weeks but enjoy feeding now. Was worth the struggle.

mikado1 Thu 29-Dec-16 22:05:53

How's day 4 been OP?

TootsieBootsie Fri 30-Dec-16 01:55:05

Last night not so good!
Spoke to midwife today who isn't concerned and said it's normal behaviour,baby is still learning and it should improve when milk comes in etc.
Have bought a breast pump now to help keep supply up and give me help if it continues as the constant latching on and off is really hurting!!!

ThatsNotMyToddler Fri 30-Dec-16 08:31:31

Hope you've got plenty of lansinoh OP - slather it on before and after every feed! Will really help keep your nipples intact. And good luck, it can be hard to start with. I remember well those feeds when you're gritting your teeth waiting for the discomfort to subside (even with a perfect latch).

Your milk will probably be in today so hope you're not feeling too engorged. It can help to hand express a little off before feeds if your boobs are really full - stops the baby just bouncing off!!

TootsieBootsie Fri 30-Dec-16 19:17:42

Yes, got my tube at the ready!!
I'm getting there, today has been good and last night there was nearly a routine to her waking and no screaming fits. I don't want to tempt fate though, will see how tonight goes now!

ThatsNotMyToddler Fri 30-Dec-16 19:46:16

Well done. Good luck tonight then

mikado1 Sat 31-Dec-16 09:33:09

Good woman! Try not to worry about a routine just yet!!

TootsieBootsie Sat 31-Dec-16 21:31:49

I'm not worried about routine really, just feeding on demand. Midwife saw her today and she's dropped quite a bit from birth weight but she's not concerned at the mo but will hopefully gain a bit before I see her again in a few days!
Happy new year to you all and thanks for the advice and support smile

ThatsNotMyToddler Mon 02-Jan-17 19:32:25

Hope things are getting easier OP?

TootsieBootsie Mon 02-Jan-17 22:56:29

Yes they are thank you smile
Weighed today and gone up in weight which had made me a little less anxious. She's feeding much better now especially at night but falls asleep and then wakes as soon as I try to put her down but that's another story!!!

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