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I am finding bf a 18 month old really great

(5 Posts)
weebairn Sun 27-Mar-16 16:16:59

I am now into my favourite ever part of breastfeeding. My daughter is 18 months old and now feeding only once a day, in the morning. She sleeps through the night now. She sometimes wakes up at 5.30am and I just take her into bed and she can feed for over an hour while I snooze sometimes. Total win. It's like the biggest cuddle ever.

The rest of the time I can work shifts, night shifts, go away for a weekend, see friends, I sometimes miss bedtimes for work and for socialising, I wear normal clothes and bras - I am totally unrestricted. She was feeding 4x a night before xmas and even though it saddened me to do so, we decided to night wean because I was struggling to stay sharp at work on my long shifts. My boyfriend did it by cosleeping with her in the spare room and bringing her to me for feeds, cutting them down one by one, he did it gently and slowly. I did wonder if it would even be possible - I did consider giving up feeding entirely (and plenty of people told me it was incompatible with the type of work I do…) so I am so happy I found a way to continue that suits our family.

I had an easy-ish time of breastfeeding in the early days but the sleep deprivation was killing me a few months ago when she was still feeding all night. I had wanted to night wean her a lot earlier because I was so tired but… she was diagnosed kidney cancer when she was only 10 months old and I couldn't deny her anything then. I wanted so badly to keep feeding her through her chemo but I was so so tired. I thought about stopping so many times.

I did a lot of crying when she was having her chemo about what was the point of bf when she had fucking cancer, it had never done her any good, what was the point. A friend of mine said it was giving her lots of good stuff as the chemo was taking stuff away. But I struggled to believe it. I felt so bad.

But I'm so glad I didn't stop. I'm so glad I am being rewarded with this after all my hard work.

So much of breastfeeding can be hard work and tiring so I just wanted to say I love this bit so much.

weebairn Sun 27-Mar-16 16:18:39

ps. she is doing great now and has finished her treatment. prognosis is excellent.

geekaMaxima Sun 27-Mar-16 16:31:18

That's lovely, OP. So glad your DD is doing well now smile

CuppaTeaAndAJammieDodger Sun 27-Mar-16 16:34:28

I think I might have something in my eye - such a wonderful story. And don't question whether you did the right thing BFing through chemo, if nothing else just think how much comfort it would have given your DD.

angelicjen Sun 27-Mar-16 16:37:10

smile

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