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Tell me it'll be ok

(9 Posts)
SausageSmuggler Sun 09-Aug-15 21:41:43

DC3 is 12 days old and, by some miracle I'm still bf (I'd given up by this point with the other two). I'm really pleased its going well and it is slowly getting easier BUT DH goes back to work next week and I'm anxious about how I'll manage.

DD will cluster feed throughout the day and so far I've felt tied to the sofa which has been fine while DH can keep them entertained but the thought of taking them out by myself and then having to make them sit down for ages while I bf worries me. They're only 4 and 3 so get restless quickly.

Also bfing in public makes me break out in a cold sweat because DD takes ages to latch on and I've struggled to try and do this discreetly. Very hard due to having enormous norks!

I'm sure these are very common panics but I suppose I'm just after some reassurance or tips on making things easier. Hope my sleep deprived ramble made sense.

CasualJersey Sun 09-Aug-15 21:48:06

Well done!!!
You are doing brilliantly
I will indeed be ok
Let's think rationally.
Firstly start by going to places that are feeding friendly, toddler groyos, BF cafe. Enlist friends when out too.
Plus it's day 12. There's jo immediate rush to go out, instead set yourself a few
Small goals of how and when you get out.
Talk to your two older ones, set some gentle rules about what you expect when you are out and baby is feeding.
Honestly though try not to worry, and get a feeding cover If you are worried about flashing and pop to H&M for a few great BF tops. Totally worth the money.
And again!
Well done you!
All else fails you can just go home!!

StoryOfMyLife Sun 09-Aug-15 22:48:11

Well done, you are doing great! It will all be ok, you are getting through the hardest bit!

I started really slowly once my husband went back to work. In the first few days I took my 3 yo to the park round the corner. My baby wanted to feed and feed and so I sat on the bench while my little girl played. I had a box of raisins for her too. Once she was done and bored my baby still wasn't done but I just dashed home!

My baby will reliably sleep in the car so is take them out for a drive somewhere then find a park.

I carry my daughters kiddigo thing which has videos so if I get stuck needing to feed in the car she's got something to keep her occupied. Also snacks keep her busy for a wee while.

If you need to use a breastfeeding cover to feed in public so that, I use a big muslin or blanket. I started, like the pp, feeding at toddler groups and with ante natal friends and have built up to being more confident feeding in most places.

You don't need to jump right into a full social life and activities for the older ones, this is early days, just do little steps and before you know it you will be confident.

Good luck and well done grin

chandelierswinger Sun 09-Aug-15 22:53:07

You're doing brilliantly!!! "One day at a time" was my motto. I just concentrated on feeding for this feed only and, miraculously, the days went into weeks, the week's turned into months and then I found myself worrying about how to stop when baby was over 12 months! Keep up your hard work flowers

Mummify Sun 09-Aug-15 23:00:40

You are doing brilliantly. You sound like a wonderful mum to your brood. I would say don't feel bad if there is more cebebes or films than norm - it is early days and there is plenty of time in a few weeks or months for getting out and about, and doing more activities with your 3 and 4 year old. I only have 2 but found playdough, a sticker book, or building a den and letting them have a snack in it would keep my then 2yo entertained for a good long period while feeding or settling!
Keep drinking lots of water and be kind to yourself x

marshmallowpies Sun 09-Aug-15 23:12:59

I remember hating feeding in public at that stage because it really feels like you're wrestling with your bare boobs in public, I got so nervous.

Finding cafes with nice comfy sofas or deep armchairs I could snuggle down into and which gave me a good supportive shape to sit in really helped - no wobbling around flailing my arms on awkward little bistro chairs until I really felt comfortable feeding in public. Even now at 6 months DD2 will have an awkward moment and refuse to latch on when there are distractions, or it's too hot, or whatever it is that's pissed her off, so I just detach and give her a cuddle, move her somewhere else and try again a few minutes later.

Anyway it sounds like you're doing great - it was one feed at a time, one day at a time for me too at that point, but every day gets a little easier.

SausageSmuggler Mon 10-Aug-15 08:28:17

Thanks for the reassurance I know plenty of women manage but it is daunting never the less. Marshmallow my attitude has been one feed at a time too though I set myself a target of two weeks which is tomorrow so pretty pleased with that.

BugPlaster Mon 10-Aug-15 09:18:50

Well done on the bf and for asking for reassurance. It will be ok.

NickyEds Mon 10-Aug-15 20:29:39

I'm bf my 3 week old dd at the moment and I've got a 20 month old ds. I've yet to take them out on my own and I'm very nervous about trying. I think the first few trips will just be to the park which is literally over the road!

We've had several trips as a family though and I've been bf in public for the first time. With ds one of the main reasons I mix fed was because I didn't want to feed in public and literally never did it. This time bf is going much better so wanted to limit f . I had to force myself to bf in a local cafe when dd was 4 days old and no one even noticed don't think, or if they did I didn't IYSWIM. I've fed her all over the place since then and not one shiny shit has been given! Noone cares! I'm now really hoping that her feeds spread out and go quicker as that would really help when trying to entertain ds at the same time.

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