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Newborn breast feeding driving me insane. Help!

(10 Posts)
Katekoom Wed 14-Jan-15 18:35:51

I think I'm losing it!
Our baby girl is 4 days old and has so far done nothing but feed. My milk has finally come in (overnight last night) and she gets a good latch but usually falls asleep at the breast. I've tried all sorts to keep her actively sucking and can usually get 20mins out of her. She'll feed literally all day, when not feeding she cries to be fed and never sleeps unless being held.
I haven't slept in days and I don't know if I can keep this up!
How long does this feeding behaviour last? It's relentless.

squizita Wed 14-Jan-15 18:41:25

It was 4 or 5 days with mine. Will she sleep on your Dp? We did shifts ... I'd feed then crawl off and sleep as she slept on dh then swap.
It really improved after even a week ... then after a month or so her days/nights became more clear too.

From mates I understand it's the same with FF! Tiny bottles and short sleeps 24-7.

So tough but they all do it. Hang on in there ... last night I tutted to my husband "wow she's hungry ... she woke THREE times last night!" As by 4 months that's an unusual night.

Reekypear Wed 14-Jan-15 18:42:07

Both my boys did this, I just went with it, if you go with it you will end up doing it second nature. Tbh you have to grit your teeth and get on with it.

I co-slept,But I followed all the rules. I also gave up worrying about house work etc, I also had lots of high calorific easy to grab meals ready.

Lots of positive to sticking with it, it's very early days, it will get better.

ChaffinchOfMegalolz Wed 14-Jan-15 18:45:58

it gets better, as each day passes. congratulations!

MrsNutella Wed 14-Jan-15 18:50:18

Congratulations on your new baby! Will she sleep on DH? Or can someone take her for a walk for an hour?

It does get better, you're doing an amazing job. She just doesn't know yet that she is separate to you. I think the idea of a "fourth trimester" makes sense. Both of mine wanted to be near, on, fed basically in my arms or someone's arms most of the time in those early days.

DD is five months now and I can't believe so much time has whizzed past.

Try and enjoy watching your baby grow and tell yourself you're doing an amazing thing looking after this tiny person. thanks

Heels99 Wed 14-Jan-15 18:56:06

This is what they don't tell you at ante natal classes!
Give her to your partner for an hour or two and get some sleep, it needs to be a team effort.
If you hadn't slept in days you would likely be at deaths door so take heart that actually you are getting some sleep although it feels like none!

Newquay Wed 14-Jan-15 19:10:23

Massive congratulations. Great words of wisdom already given. Your situation sounds normal tbh. My DC2 is 9 weeks now and I'm just starting to feel a bit normal
- but had the same experience as you. Things that helped me this time around: I 'invested' in getting the maximum quality from sleep by (1)!buying the best pillow I could afford with gift vouchers from work (2) putting a crystal under pillow (my brother swears this improves sleep - try a rose quartz) and (3) finding the time when baby will sleep on DH and I would go off to bed then (for us it was 8-10pm - even tho that meant we barely spoke to each other (other than above DC chatter/cries) for about 6 weeks. Lastly - a good mantra is 'this is just how it is right now' I.e your job at the moment is to feed - if you can just remember that - and let everyone else feed you (and do everything else) then you can hopefully accept that although it is super tough right now - you are doing the most incredible job - and hopefully you can take pleasure from it.

Just adding this as it's been my experience: On the other hand - if you cannot sleep when given the chance (I.e if you feel manic
And panicky) then it could be pnd. I've got that - had it with both DCs - and on anti depressants - and it's helped me enormously: I am just taking a low enough dose to help me grab some sleep.

It really will get better xxxx congratulate yourself every day.

happyfeet1 Wed 14-Jan-15 20:24:23

Ahh i remember feeling a bit like this...dd3 is now 5.5 months and i actually miss it (believe it or not)!! It does get easier, i promise.

Fugacity Wed 14-Jan-15 20:26:25

You baby has been able to feed 24/7 for the last 9 months. She can be forgiven for not fitting into your schedule.

tiktok Wed 14-Jan-15 20:38:54

This all sounds normal and good. Your baby is seeking comfort and reassurance as well as nourishment. She's experiencing a new and different world and being close to you helps her with your familiar smell, taste, voice.

You don't need to fight it by trying to keep her actively sucking. Let her find her own pace. Obv you will need support and whatever chance you get to sleep. But don't be driven insane smile Adjusting expectations is easier than trying to alter the normal needs of a newborn smile

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