I've just come out of hospital after a week in there in a drip with horrendous mastitis. I haven't breastfed since Saturday so my chest is still quite sore. I made the decision to stop bfing because I just cannot put myself at risk of going through that again.
I'm really upset as I really didn't want to stop, but the thought of getting mastitis again is just terrifying. I haven't ever been in so much pain except for labour, my temperature was nearly forty, and I still can't hold my little girl properly as nothing can touch my chest. I've had it before, although not quite that badly, and have nearly had it a few more times. I would be too scared at doing it again and it would take away any enjoyment.
But I am so, so sad. I miss that there was something only I could do for her. I miss the closeness, and the convenience (although feeds are now about twice as quick and I can wear normal clothes again). I just miss it and I had no time to get used to the idea because I had to stop so suddenly - I didn't even know that the last feed I have her would be her last.
Please don't say I don't have to give up if I don't want to, because I really just could not cope with the thought of constantly worrying about getting blocked ducts again. I did absolutely everything I could to clear it, was on antibs within two hours of feeling fluey, and still ended up in hospital, so it's not like I can say I could be more prepared next time. I just need a bit of help working out how to stop crying about it.
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Infant feeding
Really upset about stopping
11 replies
SquidgyMaltLoaf · 31/10/2014 09:37
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