I had DD 15 weeks ago. Breastfeeding got off to a tricky start. Her mouth was small and it was painful bt we perservered. She ended up in hospital at 10 days old with an infection and was too weak to suck properly so she ended up on a bottle. I expressed milk during this time. We came out of hospital and ended up with thrush. I had a lot of support from a local breastfeeding group and got the treatment needed but it took a few weeks to clear. I was still expressing off one side as I couldnt get DD to take that side. Finally a few weeks ago I got her to latch on both sides and breastfeeding finally clicked into place. Throughout all this I was determined to keep feeding as I felt it was the best thing for us. I felt too disorganised to get to grips with formula and I enjoyed feeding her. The last few weeks have been lovely. Feeding has been pain free and DD has thrived.
Sorry for the essay, I'll get to the point now. I had blood pressure problems and pre eclampsia before DD was born. My blood pressure has remained high despite the highest dose of labetelol. In the last couple of weeks I have had severe dizzy spells. The other day I nearly fell while holding DD so made an appt withy GP (earliest ome available was over a week away). Today I developed blind spots in my vision and knew my blood pressure must be high. I got in with the doctor and sure enough my blood presure is dangerously high. Labetelol isnt cutting it. It is too dangerous too breastfeed on any other drug. It is too dangerous for me not to take another drug. I have got to give up breastfeeding. I know its for the best. It is more important for DD that I am healthy than she is breastfed. She has been breastfed for 15 weeks which was a start.
Intellectually I know all this. I just feel absolutely heartbroken. Im putting off taking the first tablet until tomorrow so I can feed my little girl overnight. DH and I have agreed that we will have no more children so aftertonight I will never breastfeed again. It is purely selfish really. I love breastfeeding. I love the way it makes me feel. Dd was very small at birth and has put on weight beautifully. It took a lot of work to persevere and I really thought I would feed her until at least 1 year old. I just feel so sad. I need to snap out of this. I have a lovely healthy baby and a loving husband. DH has just been diagnosed with MS so it is even more important that I look after my health.
Please come and tell me I will feel better soon and that stopping breastfeeding is not the huge deal I am turning it into.
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No choice but to give up breastfeeding.
44 replies
Piffyonarockbun · 05/06/2014 17:48
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