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Finding the responsibility of bf tough

(18 Posts)
Littlef00t Thu 22-May-14 23:08:57

Dd is 11wks and bf going well, but finding it psychologically challenging that I'm solely responsible for feeding and so tied - and knackered.

I guess the answer is to express, but last time I offered a bottle she just smiled and lapped at it. Don't know if I can face finding out for certain she's a bottle refuser.

Been in tears today, not sure what I'm asking really. Can a bottle refuser be persuaded to take one, and any other words of wisdom?

mamababa Thu 22-May-14 23:19:31

It gets better and you are doing great. My advice is to try again with expressed in a bottle but not you, your DH/DP. Even if just one feed that break helps.

AtrociousCircumstance Thu 22-May-14 23:32:45

It might take a good few goes to get your baby to accept a bottle - don't despair if it takes a while.

My DS2 wouldn't accept one at first (we started trying when he was three/four months) but with a bit of perseverance he found his way. He's now mostly bf but able to take a bottle when needed.

rosiedays Thu 22-May-14 23:45:44

It's daunting and relentless at times but so so worth it. (I have a 10month old bottle refuser) as mamasays you're doing great. Keep offering the bottle maybe one day it will be the right day and she will take it. (dd never did and I offered at least once a week!) the time will pass and she will move on to other're over 1/3 way to weaning. The full on solo responsibility is only for a few more weeks. Dd started taking water from a straw cup at 6 months. So if I have to leave her now I just leave her with water. I went through every possible cup on the market till I found one she liked.
On tough days (of which there were many) I'd look at her little chubby legs and think 'i did that all by myself smile
Can you get to a bf group or cafe... A good old moan with those who understand can really help.
Good luck and well done xx

DevonCiderPunk Thu 22-May-14 23:50:52

11 weeks! Well done. You've come so far, and you're getting close to the point where you are not the only source of food. Keep on doing as well as you have been doing. It won't always be like this!

Littlef00t Fri 23-May-14 09:27:50

Thanks everyone smile

Just having a tough time at the mo. DH was made redundant just before Christmas and now having to dig into limited savings (good leaving package), anniversary of my mum's death last weekend and feeling ill and run-down must find those vitamins

Ah well, suck it up...

QuietNinjaTardis Fri 23-May-14 09:32:14

I felt and still feel like this sometimes but I'm also so proud that I'm still bf at 5 and a half months. She's doing so well and has fat little legs and I did that. It's a lovely feeling. You're doing fab.

CarCiKoTab Fri 23-May-14 09:39:04

Of course if your baby is hungry they will have anything I'm sure. I never gave mine a choice to refuse If your struggling then express I solely expressed for my third for 8 weeks and I feel really proud of myself because with all three of mine breastfeeding was really difficult, it's not my thing. The problem with breastfeeding is it is so demanding, you feel like even after pregnancy your body is not yours amongst a whole lot of other things, you don't want to feel resentment so my advice is do what suits you! You baby will get used to it and you can always experiment with different bottles as my third didn't like the tommee tippee bottles as the silicone is so hard on them it was difficult for her to get any out.

Do what suits you, you are in control.

callamia Fri 23-May-14 09:44:08

You're doing great, but I know what it feels like to be the one in charge, all day and all night. I went back to work at six months, and so there was little option but a bottle - actually a soft spout cup worked better for us. It's taken a little while, but he's taking pretty good feeds from it now. Now the challenge is to express (today, while presenting at a 9-5 conference) - compared to this feeding on demand ses like the easy option... Expressing can be more time consuming than breastfeeding. Although at least you can eat and reply to emails at the same time without distracting your baby smile

NorahBone Sat 24-May-14 18:35:52

It took a few goes with the bottle for us. I think we tried two or three times and then he took a bottle perfectly. We didn't keep up with it though, so now he is a complete bottle refuser. Trying different bottles might help, but that is easier said than done. Keep trying and good luck!

NorahBone Sat 24-May-14 18:38:14

It took a few goes with the bottle for us. I think we tried two or three times and then he took a bottle perfectly. We didn't keep up with it though, so now he is a complete bottle refuser. Trying different bottles might help, but that is easier said than done. Keep trying and good luck!

Trooperslane Sat 24-May-14 18:46:30

Ahhhh op just brewbrewbrew and thanksthanksthanksthanks for you. X

PassTheCremeEggs Sat 24-May-14 18:56:38

Mine both took occasional bottles up to 3 months then refused. Both started taking them again at around 6 months and I was able to stop breastfeeding the first, and I'm winding down on the second at the moment (he's 6.5 months). So there is hope!

redcaryellowcar Sat 24-May-14 19:04:47

you have done really well, i think you might find you are just coming to the end of a growth spurt and that after this your lo will start having longer gaps between feeds making it seem less constant? mine would never take bottle but to be honest i never persisted as rather liked being able to leave the house with just a spare nappy. friends who were successful at introducing a bottle managed it by sending mum out for a 10 minute walk whilst dad or better still experienced bottle feeding other (mum from playgroup etc?) has a go.

Littlef00t Sat 24-May-14 19:25:02

Ah, everything looking brighter today smile she happily took the offered bottle at her dream feed (that us crashing around getting ready for bed was more of a wake feed) and then proceeded to go from 1:30am to 6:45am - must have got the memo it was my birthday today as the best present I received was 5 proper hours sleep!!

Littlef00t Sat 24-May-14 19:25:48

Thanks everyone for your lovely messages. Feeling human again grin

Trooperslane Sun 25-May-14 09:25:27

5 hours sleep shock. Well done wee one.

Fwiw my dd was mix fed (whole other thread) and I probably could have got to 100% bf, but I found it totally overwhelming that it would be me and me only to feed her.

Just stopped at 8 months and I miss it

Midori1999 Sun 25-May-14 19:53:49

Glad she took a bottle and you got a good stretch of sleep!

My DS is a bottle refuser. Tbh, I could probably persevere with trying like I did with DD, but I just couldn't be bothered and now he's 7 months he can have yoghurts/solids/sips of water when I leave him, so it's not so bad.

If I'm shattered then I spend a few hours or as long as I need in bed and DH brings DS to me for feeds and then takes him downstairs again after. He's done this since DS was quite young. Is this something you and your DH could do? Even when DS was tiny I found as long as someone held him he would often sleep for quite a stretch.

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