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Stressed, depressed & worried - 6 wo refusing breast

(8 Posts)
sleepywombat Sun 23-Mar-14 06:00:47

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ChopperHopper Sun 23-Mar-14 06:57:34

Hi there - I hope I can help a little. I've been in a similar situation with my now 12 wo DS3. He fed fairly ok for the first few weeks too.

As you say you are already Dairy, wheat and soy free that discounts one of the things I was going to suggest, which leaves me with two other suggestions - tongue tie and reflux.

My DS has had two tongue ties - one at the front, which was diagnosed and clipped at 6 weeks, and one at the back (known as posterior tongue tie) only just diagnosed and clipped.

The falling asleep at the breast then getting frustrated and screaming are what my DS started doing. He also developed an explosive tummy and started producing very green nappies as he had a hind milk/foremilk imbalance (he was just sucking the end of the nipple like a straw so only getting foremilk). Tongue tie babies often have poor weight gain. My DS also made terrible clicking and slurping sounds whilst feeding, drooled milk everywhere and fell asleep at the breast because he was so tired trying to use a tongue that didn't work properly. The latch is very shallow and it makes you sore.

I don't know enough about reflux to give you proper information about it, but it might be worth considering it as another possibility. For what it's worth my DS was treated as if he had dairy intolerance and reflux but eventually we have discovered all his issues are down to the tongue ties. He has been very colicky and impossible to settle during the day, especially with my other two being around.

I would suggest you contact your GP and HV and see if you can start to narrow it down. GP for the reflux side and your HV to refer you to a lactation consultant to look at his mouth and see if there is a tie.

I would warn you that if it is tongue tie there is a lot of misunderstanding and misinformation about it and some ties are hard to spot. I had to travel some distance last week to Southampton to get the posterior tie diagnosed but the Dr there is an expert in it. If you would like details of who I saw I will gladly give them.

Sorry I have written an essay but wanted to just put some ideas to you. If you have any more questions or would like more info or just support I will gladly help you and will check back.

For now I suggest you try to express as much as you can as he needs to feed and you need to keep your supply going. You could try alternating feeds between bottle and breast. See if you have any of the same issues giving him milk from a bottle, which will help to narrow it down from the reflux perspective. In the meantime I'm going to get you some decent info about tongue tie and will post them here as links.

ChopperHopper Sun 23-Mar-14 07:02:33

I'm so sorry - I missed the part where you said he's ok with the bottle. Ok - in that case I would still go to GP to rule out reflux / silent reflux or any other reason but I'd also definitely get him checked for tongue tie. I will be back with some decent information for you.

ChopperHopper Sun 23-Mar-14 07:14:17

Some links about tongue tie from the clinic I went to last week. Dr Griffiths is one of the leading tongue tie experts in the UK as far as I have been told:

BadPenny Sun 23-Mar-14 07:34:47

Something else that might help is using a lactation aid instead of bottles. Some babies are fine with bottles but some end up very frustrated at the breast because unlike a bottle the flow is not constant - you have to elicit a let-down.

If you ask the feeding specialist midwife at your hospital or try to find a local breastfeeding group where they have this resource - the easiest thing to use is a feeding tube (ng tube). It basically works like a long straw so the baby drinks milk from a bottle at the same time as from the breast, so initially keeps the baby interested and then you can gradually get the baby used to normal milk flow by periodically slowing the flow through the tube by pinching it a bit.

Also second the above suggestions re getting tongue tie checked and also get help from someone who knows about these things to make sure you are getting the best latch. Sounds like you're doing an amazing job, above and beyond the call - hope you get the support you need!

ChopperHopper Sun 23-Mar-14 07:36:54

This is also a very good place to go to for advice:

Layana Mon 24-Mar-14 08:50:30

You know what I think my lovely. But my heart goes out to you.
I'd also suspect tie/s. And reflux.
But I know you know where to look for help with those.

But for those that don't here are two fb groups with parents and professionals on who might be able to help you out.
Tongue Tie Babies Support Group

Layana Mon 24-Mar-14 08:52:37

Infant Tongue Tie UK

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