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I need some encouragement

(13 Posts)
Madratlady Sun 09-Mar-14 22:01:14

I have been expressing for ds for 12 weeks now, sadly he couldn't bf. I tried to express at least 6 times a day but we've got into a routine where I pump morning, afternoon, evening and once during the night. Ds gets 1/2 - 2/3 of his milk from me.

Tonight I feel totally fed up with it. I hate the feel of the breast pump. Having to pump for half an hour 3 times a day doesn't sound like much but it takes up a lot of ds' s nap time when I could be keeping on top of stuff around the house or catching up on sleep or something. It's precious time as ds doesn't like to be put down. And the night pumping session is the worst. I'm exhausted and the last thing I want to do after feeding and settling ds is sit attached to the breast pump.

I initially planned to pump for 3 months but now my aim is to keep going until 6 months or even until I go back to work at 9 months. I just need a kick up the bum tonight.

rosiedays Mon 10-Mar-14 01:13:53

Ok smile here goes! ! smile
Wow 12 weeks expressing is a bloody achievement. That is amazing commitment. I know what you mean about hating the sensation. I did too (and my hands hurt! ! ) do you have a decent pump? I have gone through times when i have hated the feeling of bf as well though so I think that's kinda normal.
I bf because for me it's easier but to be doing all the sterilising faf and pump and feed and everything else you deserve to be kind to yourself. You doing great
Hope that helps. smile

anothernumberone Mon 10-Mar-14 01:26:42

I hope you do not hate me for this suggestion and I get you have been round and round trying to achieve this but could you do some skin to skin and see what happens. No bra nothing and lie the baby on your tummy, tummy to tummy.

I get it is nuts but one of my friends had a premmie and got her first ever latch at 12 weeks. She did skin to skin a fair bit but to no effect and then she took the breast of her own accord out of nowhere. It took time but it went from nothing to full on feeding by 16 weeks. You have the supply already so if you could even partially cut out the middle man, the pump you would dispense with the workload. I pumped for a month on dd1 as I was cutting down my supply as it was a hired pump on the last day after 4 weeks of bottles she latched on again. I was at the end though but I always regret not trying again as she was only 6 weeks but my supply was all but gone.

Btw you are fantastic and have been wonderful and whatever you do that does not change.

MrsCakesPremonition Mon 10-Mar-14 01:59:21

I am truly impressed that you are managing with expressing.It is something I personally found very difficult, so you commitment and success is wonderful.

thanks cake brew - all well-earned.

Sunnysummer Mon 10-Mar-14 02:03:26

You are incredible to keep it up! We exclusively expressed for just a few weeks and that really tested my (pretty strong) commitment to breastfeeding.

Have you been on some US forums about pumping? My friend did exclusive pumping and said that she found a lot of support from the forums with US mothers who had to head back to work really early and kept pumping.

AnythingNotEverything Mon 10-Mar-14 02:12:33

Wowsers - well done for reaching 12 weeks! I expressed for 6 weeks for DS who wouldn't feed from me and it was tough.

I wonder if you could drop the middle of the night pumping session now. DD was sleeping 11-7 by 10 weeks so it's quite plausible that missing a night feed would not negatively affect your supply at this point.

Could you add an extra morning session to make up for it?

The only other thing to suggest is to make sure you're maximising your efficiencies:

1) are you pumping while someone else feeds as much as possible (ie when DP/DH is home)?
2) are you reusing your pump parts rather than sterilising inbetween pumping sessions? KellyMom has info about how often you need to wash your equipment, and it's not as often as you think! I think you can do it just once a day if you bag and refrigerate inbetween.
3) do you have a double pump?
4) lots of people get more milk out in the morning, and by doing compressions - could you take advantage of an early alarm call to pump?

Sorry if you know all this - it's worth checking as these kind of tips can make all the difference.

Beccadugs Mon 10-Mar-14 02:29:48

You are doing amazingly! I'm on day 4 of pumping (attached right now!) and hope I achieve what you have!!

Madratlady Mon 10-Mar-14 13:18:20

Thank you, I'm feeling much more positive again today! Although I have a very sore right boob for some reason.

rosie I do have a good double pump, it helped loads when I got a double one.

another I should probably try more skin to skin to see what happens. It's been about a month since I gave up trying to bf, ds can and did latch on but after a few sucks would end up screaming in frustration that the milk wasn't coming fast enough. It was quite stressful for both of us so in the end I just stopped trying. I often think I should have carried on trying but at the time he was sleeping very badly and I was too exhausted to keep going.

anything I wish ds would sleep 11-7, he's still up twice a night to feed so it's not too hard to pump after one of those feeds. It's usually the early morning feed so any time between 3 and 5am. Dh is at work all day but he does feed ds while i do the evening pumping session before bed. That's interesting about washing the pump less, that would make it easier to pump more often I think. I'd like to pump twice rather than once in the morning so I have to give ds less formula during the day, I definitely get more milk in the morning.

anothernumberone Mon 10-Mar-14 16:10:45

Well like I said hats off to you. Have you considered an supplemental nursing system? These are all just suggestions you might be way past all this and I do not want to rehash old ground. I have been through much hassle trying to bf babies myself so I do not underestimate what you are doing at all.

findingherfeet Mon 10-Mar-14 16:16:32

I think reaching 12 weeks is fantastic, a real achievement and it must have taken a lot of commitment and determination.

Personally I absolutely hate expressing but thankfully my two babies have managed to feed fine but expressing is hard hard work and I have a lot of admiration for you.

Keep going!!! (Though to be honest I think only if you want to, nothing awful will happen if you stop, happy mummy is important too)

Madratlady Mon 10-Mar-14 16:30:23

another I have a SNS but I hate it' it's fiddly and messy and ds wouldn't latch on at all with the tube there. Again, maybe I should have tried harder but the main reason I stopped trying to bf was that it was getting in the way of just enjoying and bonding with my baby. Instead I was feeling stressed and guilty about not being able to bf him. And massively resentful with scbu for not providing better bf support and not diagnosing his tongue tie.

I'm not sure I like expressing much either finding but it feels good to know that ds is at least getting the benefit of breast milk a bit and having a bottle of expressed milk is actually much better than messing about boiling kettles and cooling bottles at 4am!

anothernumberone Mon 10-Mar-14 23:38:47

No bleeding way you should have tried harder, not a chance you are fab. I despised the pump with such a passion when I finished with it and it actually took me 3 kids to bf so I definitely cannot talk and I totally agree about the bonding. Until ds got his tt recvised bonding and bf did not enter the same zone in my house and that was 3 kids in.

anothernumberone Mon 10-Mar-14 23:40:05

3 kids all tt only one diagnosed I also feel you bitterness ;-).

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