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Witty retorts for mil?

(16 Posts)
louloutheshamed Mon 17-Feb-14 18:08:14

Who asked at the weekend if a dubious tone IfI thought I'd feed ds2 (now 5m) for quite as long as I fed ds1 (now 3, fed til 18m)....

I just said that I hoped
I would...I know she didn't approve and tbh it makes me want to feed Him til he's 7 just to wind her up further...!

The thing that annoys me is that my sil bf her ds for 14m and no one batted an eyelid prob because she didn't feed for as long as I did- I kind of feel as If I paved the way for her and had to be the one to bear the brunt of all the sneery comments...

JiltedJohnsJulie Mon 17-Feb-14 18:36:41

Just tell her that with this one you are aiming to stop when they are in the first year of High School grin

BadPenny Mon 17-Feb-14 20:03:36

How about "You'll have to wait till he learns to talk so you can ask him yourself!"

MoreSkyThanWeNeed Mon 17-Feb-14 20:06:27

How about "Fuck off"?
But I'm not witty and my MIL really annoys me.

KoalaFace Mon 17-Feb-14 20:10:24

"The brilliant thing about breast feeding is that you can carry on for as long as it suits you and the baby! So we'll just see how we feel."

Thats what I'm planning to say to anyone who makes the same annoying comments I got when breastfeeding DS (until he was almost 2) with DC2 due now!

AGoodPirate Mon 17-Feb-14 20:11:57

Ha my MIL gave me the same talk, I just used my usual slightly distracted pleasant tone "Mmm" and a big smile.

mellojello Mon 17-Feb-14 20:16:30

Why do they bloody say it? Are we 'new fangled' or is it like a jealousy thing because we have a bond with the baby?

It baffles me & really really annoys me sad

louloutheshamed Mon 17-Feb-14 20:56:44

She did bf her 3 dc but only for 3-4 m on a 3-4 hr routine and guess what, she didn't have enough milk. When I read about this in the politics of bf it made me so sad that there were a generation of women who were never told about demand feeding....however I am same age as dh and my mums gets it so...?

The fact that I never used bottles/dummies with ds1 baffles her. And don't get her started on waiting til 6m for solids....

TheABC Mon 17-Feb-14 21:05:33

I smile and ignore. But then, I love my mother in law (mostly) and it generally stems from inaccurate information.

Everyone else gets the wide eyed stare..."but we are just getting good at this"

FunkyBoldRibena Mon 17-Feb-14 21:09:32

Why, do you want some?

JiltedJohnsJulie Mon 17-Feb-14 21:18:57

Just had to say, love your name funky grin

MissRatty Tue 18-Feb-14 17:35:46

Something like "well I'd have loved to feed them both until the average age of 4.5y, but it didn't go that way last time, so I just do my best"....NOT that I am saying you didn't bf long enough, but four and a half is the average age worldwide (developing countries probaby don't have the same diet and weaning opportunities as us)...but it might shut her up and make her think twice. Adding "so how long did you bf for with yours?". She might feel a bit silly. Its everyone's choice, and she shouldn't really even be asking!

Well done on doing it for so long! We're mixed feeding and I'm struggling with bf at only 11 weeks...

PurplePidjin Tue 18-Feb-14 17:43:37

Flat stare and "Why?" worked for me

SomethingkindaOod Tue 18-Feb-14 17:45:07

"My tits my choice"?
Too rude? <not known for tact>

99redbafoons Tue 18-Feb-14 17:59:55

"Well, the thing is it's all going so bloody well and he and I both enjoy it so much I see no reason to stop - do you?"

And that's the time you implement your "fuck off, you irritating knob" look.

GimmeDaBoobehz Tue 18-Feb-14 18:38:45

"That's funny, I didn't realise that you gave birth to him. Damn, I have no idea why I had that morning sickness, the big belly and the agonising labour for it all to have been you having him. What, you didn't? Well, how come your passing comment then, it isn't your choice."


"Funny, I didn't realise there was a deadline to these things. Will you be marking my results?"


"Hmmm, that's very nice MIL."

Depends what kind of tone you were wanting to set, really.

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