EBF 2wk old won't stop feeding (10hrs) and he's getting flustered(24 Posts)
A good length of time at each breast and then a dummy seems like a fair compromise to me You did your time last night and sound like you need a rest!
At 2 weeks old, I would minimise the dummy use, as your DS is trying to build your milk supply. At the moment your milk supply is purely driven by hormones, which you're stimulate to produce by your baby nursing (the main hormones are prolactin, which your pregnancy and birth stimulate; and oxytocin, which is stimulated in both you and your baby by close contact, nursing, gazing into each other's eyes). Your future supply is vulnerable at this stage, as you can't artificially up those hormones and you can't do something later to compensate for them not being stimulated now. After about 6 weeks, the hormones reduce and the milk becomes a simpler 'supply and demand' system, whereby as long as your supply was established well in the early weeks, removal of milk will stimulate more milk.
So, your milk supply in the early weeks (less than about 6 weeks) needs your baby to suckle and snuggle to get it going properly. Your baby will feel the urge to suckle even when he's not hungry precisely for this reason, but because he's not hungry, a dummy will do fine for him and he may happily suckle the dummy until he's genuinely hungry again. That's fine for him (now), but your supply needs the stimulation. After 6 weeks or so, your baby is increasingly suckling to actually feed, so dummies are less of an issue (because baby will spit it out and holler at you if you give a dummy while they're hungry!).
I guess what I'm saying is try to keep a balance between allowing the loooooong suckling sessions and buying yourself a shower by using a dummy. You won't be doing yourself any favours later if you use the funny to satisfy your babies suckling urge for long periods during these early weeks.
Phew, that was a bit if a rant/biology lesson! Ignore me I it was too much, I just know I struggled to understand why I should/shouldn't do things while breastfeeding, so now I know a bit thought if pass it on. Ultimately you need to work out what works best for you all (and you having some sleeep has to factor in there!), but information can only help those decisions
Take care and I hope you get some peace tonight!
We have borrowed a sling from a friend to see if it get help. Dh was great this evening, he tried a lot of techniques with ds and tried his hardest until he woke up again at about midnight. I might try to limit the reds to 30 minutes on each side and then offer the dummy as surely he can't feed for as long as he was. If I need to feed more often then so be it, but at least I will get some rat in between. This is my crazy idea for tonight... obviously the proof will be in the pudding!
And thanks for the Richard and Judy 5 s techniques. It surprisingly works! Although ds didn't go to sleep so would have to hold him on his side for a long time! Good to know though.
Thanks again for all your advice. Hopefully tonight will be better xx
Janie, well done on the epic feed, it must have been a long night. With DS, sometimes to give me a quick break DH would put him in the sling and go for a walk. Not a long one as I saw the cluster feeds as important, but you do need to have a shower/make tea/cry alone/put more lansinoh on your nipples sometimes... Would your baby go in a sling? DS would cry for a minute or two then settle.
My very personal view that I really needed DH to help durning nights to start with even when back at work, but I know that doesn't work for everyone. He did nappy changes, walked the baby, made me tea.. It made a huge difference to me.
If you want a video of the Harvey karp thing, google Richard and Judy Happiest Baby. Might be easier to understand the video if you are tired
I know you want DH to sleep, and he can't feed Lo, but I'd try some breast compressions, then wake up DH and get him to take Lo out in a sling or the car.
There are some more details on bfing support here
Biological nurturing I knew there was a long word for it (baby brain, hehe)
Thank you so much. I could give you all a hug. This is why I love mumsnet. Will definitely look up the biological nurturing and lactation consultants. I went to a bf group last wk but it's off until the new yr.
Thank you thank you thank you xx
Total tactic change, but if feeding isn't helping him settle, give the 5 Ss by Harvey Karp a try (Google to see a fuller explanation)
-suck (your finger, rather than nipple)
If he's been cluster feeding for 10 hrs a change for an hour or so might be a good reset for both of you (and you can have that hot shower/a wee/ power nap) while your OH steps in for a bit.
Good luck and well done. I'm 5months in with DS2, and although its been harder yards than with DS1 we're getting to the lovely cuddles that a clearly enjoys stage, and it's lovely to know I've basically pumped him up to these epic proportions..!
If you want to try the feeding on top of you, google biological nurturing. There are some fab videos of it out there
Oh, and about the 'using mummy as a dummy' thing? Bonkers! The dummy is a substitute for you, not the other way round!
Another entertaining Breastfeeding site is the Analytical Armadillo. This page talks about comfort sucking, which might be what your DS is doing tonight? AnalyticalArmadillo
And yh yh @ resentful I think I could happily have attached dd to her dad those first few weeks and said 'enjoy the experience
asshole ' lol
You've got some fab advice above its lovely to see the help you get here
Oh, and about the 'using mummy as a dummy' thing? Bonkers! The dummy is a substitute for
Feel your pain here I fell asleep the first few weeks with dd in my arms and she followed the same as your op. We've been through silent reflux, tongue tie, and I suspect a fish allergy. You've done great so far, I felt awful like we weren't 'clicking' someone advised me to hang in there till ten weeks an yes, they were right. Side feeding can be hard with a tiny baby, have you tried having him sort of on top of you? Lactation consultant showed me and it was fab for dd when teeny tiny, do you have an LC you can speak to maybe? I also fed dd at LC advice in a warm bath it was very relaxing speaking of baths maybe look at baby's routine too, find bathing dd on a night (she also had colic) sent her into a frenzy and she'd be awake then for EVER so bathed her on mornings instead - apart from the above I can't really say much except hang in there, I know its pants xx
It's classic growth spurt time - it will calm down again!! With regards to his usual feeding pattern, as long as he's putting on weight I wouldn't bother waking him for a feed now that he's a couple of weeks old, I'd enjoy the sleep!
It is really hard in the early weeks, especially once your DH goes back to work, is sleeping somewhere else etc. your rational brain is saying its sensible for him to sleep since he can't feed baby, but the knackered and hormonal part can get a bit resentful!
Are you in bed or on a sofa/chair? If you're worried about nodding off, try to fill all the gaps and crevices with rolled up muslins/towels/a stuffed down pillow, so there is nowhere for the baby to slip down. If you're semi-reclined in bed, can you prop yourself with lots of pillows so that your arms are supported holding baby? That way if you drop off and your arms relax, the pillows will hold them in place so that baby stays on your chest? None of this is officially sanctioned advice (all cosleeping guides will tell you to minimise pillows and covers), but I would do those things rather than risk baby slipping into any gaps.
Tomorrow will be here in 4 hours (eek!) and first job for DH is tea and toast for you
Thanks happy! Yup I've been onkellymom tonight also!
And lol at the shower! I did wonder!! If only I could escape for a 2 minute shower! Xx
Thank you happy, I gratefully accept your kind pat on the back, we need that sometimes. I don't think he's unwell, hopefully not anyway. He just seems so much more flustered than normal. Unfortunately as soon as I take him off the boob he just screeches so I don't think waking dh will be much good (also he's back at work - he's been in the spare room since we came home from hospital). I've tried to master the side lying but just can't do it. Might try it again though .
He is a big feeder, usually going for about 6 hrs in the evening. The record was 12 hours but most of that was during the day on Saturday past.
I. Worrying that I'm getting very tired and dozy, crapping myself in case I doze off. Unfortunately there aren't any breaks in the feeds so no chance for a break. I wondered was he just using me as a dummy almost...but he's sucking rather than plating with my nipple.
Thanks again for your suggestions and advice xxx
And yes, the shower is for you! At 2 weeks your baby might be a bit overwhelmed by a hot shower
Your baby is building your supply. He is probably fed up of feeding, but some evolutionary urge to suckle is making him stay awake and stimulate you to make more milk for tomorrow. He may be as fed up of tonight as you are ....
Our posts crossed!
The national Breastfeeding support helpline has a website - www.nationalbreastfeedinghelpline.org.uk and a phone number - 0300 100 0212
Another good website for Breastfeeding informations is www.kellymom.com. That site has lots of evidence-based information about breastfeeding and breastmilk, though there is a chance you'll become a breastfeeding geek if you spend too long on there
This sounds like classic growth spurt feeding to me, but if you're at all worried that he needs medical attention, please go ring your midwife (they should have someone on call overnight) or health visitor (or NHS direct if more serious).
These feeding frenzies only tend to last for 24 hours or so, which although it seems like a lifetime while you're doing it, really will pass in the end! I recommend making yourself as comfortable as possible, with drinks/snacks/a book/telly remote etc, and trying to stay calm through the night. Things will seem easier tomorrow.
If you're going to doze between bouts of feeding, google some safe cosleeping guides to see how to lie with your baby safely on a bed. This is much much safer than sleeping on a sofa or in a chair. If you have a Partner who doesn't need to be on top form tomorrow, you could also wake him to sit with you/hold the baby while you doze/watch to make sure baby doesn't slip if you doze off.
Good luck and WELL DONE! Feeding a baby is an enormous accomplishment and you deserve recognition for the hard work you're putting in to feeding your baby
Thanks for your replies. He has been a bit sniffly since we got out of hospital but not so much in the last couple of days so I thought it was clearing.
I think he is probably overtired but have no idea how to get him to sleep. Normally he falls asleep on the boob.
Re the Hot shower..is that for me?! Sorry if I'm being stupid!
Also re him not having enough...he's been on for so long I don't know how he possibly couldn't have had enough
And the breastfeeding hotline...I didn't know there was such a thing. Have you a number or website?
Thank you again. I'm so tired, I would just love it if he would drift into a nice sleep for a few hours x
Fast let down that's causing him to unlatch before he's had enough?
Have you tried a warm shower?
I'd call a breastfeeding hotline pronto!
Hmm, could he be getting a cold maybe? It might be worth taking his temperature just in case.
Hope he settles soon.
Hoping someone can advise. I am aware that babies cluster feed, but my baby has been on for nearly 10 hours with only a couple of 15 minute breaks and nappy changes. He normally feels well for about 4 - 6 hours before going to sleep at about midnight when he will sleep really well and need to be woken for his next feed. I'm aware that at only 2 weeks, anything goes re. feeding but he's just frantic tonight.
He is extremely flustered at the minute, he is doing some very fast and heavy breathing while being on the boob and is frantically shaking his arms and legs and head while still latched on and then tears himself off. He will get very screechy and has uncontrollable crying.
I have changed his nappy, winded him, offered a dummy, undressed him down to his vest in case he's too warm, tried skin to skin, but the only thing that will make him settle again is going back on the boob but he will only go on for about 3 or 4 minutes before getting all shakyThis has been going on for hours. When he comes off he just screeches uncontrollably.
Is there something I've forgotten about? I just don't know what he could want. I'm worried that maybe it's something to do with my supply. I have offered both boobs. If I squeeze my nipple there is plenty of milk coming out.
Any suggestions as to what I could do or why he might getting so flustered?
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