Three days old, comfort "feeding" and won't sleep unless on boob...please help.(27 Posts)
I'm really struggling. My little one will not sleep unless he is on my breast, screams the house down when I try to take him off. I've been awake and crying since 2am, as its relentless. I'm struggling with anxiety attacks as well becuse of the lack of sleep.
He's got a gresh bum, has been winded, isn't too hot or cold etc...just needs the boob to be settled. When I take him off he screams until I put him back on.
Please what can I do? Tried hot water bottle, muslin in pram, rocking, soothing talk etc., etc. grandparents are here and have tried as well.
I have a dummy but am reluctant to try it just yet, but my sanity is waning. :-(
That sounds entirely normal for a newborn so don't worry!
Install yourself on the sofa with some snacks and drinks and the TV remote!
Has your milk come in yet? It will be much easier when it does as your baby will get a full tummy.
Oh MissRatty. Day 3 is the HARDEST DAY! The constant comfort feeding brings your milk in and boosts your supply. Completely agree with you that it is relentless. Added to that your milk coming in makes you feel even more hormonal. It's awful, but promise it gets better.
If I were you I would get DGP'S to take your baby out for a walk for an hour while you have a shower and a zzzz.
Also at this stage it's not really 'comfort' feeding. Baby needs to suck to stimulate supply of milk.
You're doing really well - it does get better. As much as I used to hate people saying that (doesn't help much at the time!) it really is true.
The other thing everyone say is, 'sleep when baby sleeps' - again, everyone says it because it's good advice. I wish I'd done that from the beginning. Being tired makes everything seem worse.
Your baby is stimulating your milk supply so feed him whenever s/he wants to get it established. This is
Completely normal in the very very early days.
Nobody tells you about the constant early feeding! Your de is establishing your milk supply. It's an absolute killer, but it will ease off. Have you got your midwives number? Or you can phone the labour ward for feeding advice.
Eat, drink and rest as much as you can (I know sleep may not be too plentiful, but as mentioned above park yourself on the sofa) don't worry about the state of the house or offending any guests by turning them away or telling them where the kettle is.
Hi, your lo will just be building up your supply - I bf dd1 until 14 months and when I had dd2 I nearly gave up on day 3 as it was relentless! It's really hard and no one tells you how hard the first few days can be, you might have one more bad night (you might not!) and then hopefully you'll find gray things do get a bit easier.
I agree with PP - get the grandparents to take him out for an hour. Have a power nap. Then put a film on and get comfy with food and water. Put Lansinoh on your nipples every time he comes off.
Your milk will magically arrive anytime now and feeding will feel more productive.
This isn't a good time for a dummy - his sucking is helping order a plentiful supply!
Take him to bed with you. Make sure there's no way he can fall out or be squashed by you or your partner. Get the grandparents to bring you lots of drinks and snacks within easy reach. Feed him while lying down on your side.
Plan on staying in bed until your milk comes in, which shouldn't be long now. Forget the house and let the grandparents deal with visitors until you are squirting milk across the living room. The baby will be so zonked by milk at that point he will sleep a little.
Don't use the dummy. Your boobs need to be sucked.
Your nipples will get sore with the constant sucking so whenever he finally drops off, let them air dry and use lansinoh too if you want. But don't keep them covered up and moist. Let the air at them.
Day 3 I affectionately remember as "the worst day of my life", my baby was continually latched too. I was overwhelmed and anxious, and exhausted, but I knew this is what the baby needed to do to get my milk to come in. And it works! I definitely agree with getting someone to take the baby out of the house for an hour, somewhere where you can't hear any crying!! My poor husband pushed our screaming son around the park in the semi-darkness (although in retrospect the sling would prob have been better), and I had the best shower and rest of my life. Well done OP, it's not easy (it gets much easier!)
It is the first massive feeding session to stimulate milk. Basically a growth spurt - they need to feed to tell your boobs to make milk. I still remember ds going from feeding every few hours at 1-2 days old to basically not coming off the boob for hours. I learnt to feed lying down (ask a bf counsellor and see if you can get a home visit).
Just let him feed and accept that this is necessary for the first bit. It will get easier. Ignore any suggestion of 4 hourly feeds etc.
Yes it's to boost your supply. You are at such a early stage. You need to nest on the sofa all day and get people to being you stuff. You are recovering too!
This WILl get better! You are feeling lousy since the adrenaline has worked off. Make sure you have lot Le of good books and don't even think about weightless. I was a sugar and carbs Hoover for the first 4 weeks then the cravings went away. Hope your dh is supportive and you feel better soon.
Everyone is right day 3 is terrible and day 4 may be worse - however long it takes for your milk to come. Stay with it, keep feeding - this bit will be over soon. I know it's almost impossible to believe that this is what's supposed to be happening but it is. You'll be reassuring someone else soon!
Oh my god guys, thank you so much for your responses! At half six my OH came and took him downstairs and I've had five hours kip. Still feel wrecked but boy did I need that.
Its so reassuring to hear other people's experiences, being a first timer I'm so anxious that i'm not doing things right etc., and just so worried about the little dude getting enough of everything.
This is his third day on planet earth so we're both still learning, and the midwife/bf lady will be out today so I'm going to be really needy with her and get some reassurance too. Don't think my milk has quite come in...looking forward to that if it nourishes him more!
Thanks again so much...its nice to hear other people have gotten through it too!! X x
Perfectly normal, probably for several weeks yet, could even be longer.
Hang in there, grab sleep when you can, it will pass. You are a new mother- be kind to yourself and accept all the help you're offered!
Trust me, you'll know when your milk comes in properly! I vividly remember the look of surprise, and then joy and then satisfaction on DS2's face the first feed after it had come in properly! He made little squeaks, I'm sure of excitement for the first few minutes - almost saying "At last! This sucking is actually working!"
I meant worn off! It's your first dc so no wonder you are thinking what's hit you? There is a reason you are tired and that is to rest and spend time with the baby. I'm glad you are feeling better!
oh my god I could have written this post except that that I'm only on day 2 and this is ds2 for me so you'd think I would have remembered. so helpful to read responses a they jogged my memory.
it's the toll of not sleeping that makes everything a million times worse but the advice of just sitting a going with it and eating loss of cake if you want to sounds good for now.
So glad you got a bit of sleep! Not sure if you've seen it already but I found this kellymom page useful the first week. Sounds like you are doing brilliantly. Hope the midwife was helpful.
When your milk comes in you will have boobs that look and feel like watermelons. There will be no doubt about it.
Also, I wanted to say that 'comfort' sucking is a legitimate and valuable activity from the baby's point of view. Even with your milk flowing, he'll probable just like being on the boob, enjoying being close and warm with you. Enjoy the cuddling time!
Chilli when I read the OP attributing her concern to bring a first timer I thought to myself the whole thing is so unbelievably intense that even if I did it all over again I probably wouldn't feel any more confident when confronted with it. Then you came on and said pretty much that was your experience with DC2!
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