BF support waning...(16 Posts)
Does anyone else find that people around them stop being supportive of bf post six months?
DD (8mths) and I are happily continuing bf, but I'm getting lots of "you're still bf-ing?", "have you tried a bottle, she might sleep better" and "it's a bit embarrassing in public" all of a sudden.
Why is it that many people are familiar with the first bit of the WHO recommendation (ebf for 6 months) but not with the second bit re doing it until 2 yrs?
Just a mini-rant, I know it doesn't really matter what others think!
Haha yes after all the pressure to breast feed at the beginning and all the 'oh well done, exclusively breastfed, good' after six months people turn to 'isn't he a bit old' 'when is he going to wean from you then'. My DS is still BF at 10 months and once when I had a cold, apparently I caught it because I BF and 'it must be draining you to feed such an older baby'
I'm in the same position. Ds is nearly 10 months, and I have started to feel more conscious of feeding him when I'm out and about. It seems like everyone I know thinks it normal to move to formula after 6 months.
Same here! Ds 10 months and I get angry with myself because I feel embarrassed when out and about and try to put him off feeding which is really unfair! I love the WHO recommendation though and quote it every time someone says something. Pr say "what's the point of making the substantial effort of trying to wean him?it's hard enough just looking after him I can't be doing that too, would just cause stress for us both!"
Yep! I think it's partly because of the breastfeeding recommendation to breastfeed exclusively for 6 months. People either ignore the 'exclusively' or don't stop to think about what it means- they just hear 'breastfeed for 6 months'. Also follow-on milk is marketed from 6 months so it's seen as a normal progression from breastfeeding.
Another thing is that our society is just not that familiar with breastfeeding. Newborns may breastfeed (what can feel like) constantly and be difficult to latch on, and sometimes people can think that this is just what breastfeeding is like. They may not realise that once you get past a certain point it can be easy and even enjoyable.
Have you got an LLL group near you? A lot of mothers start going when their baby is older because they feel a lack of support.
DS turned one on Saturday, and I'm proud to say I'm still BFing, but yes, I get what you say about people urging me to give up now
At least it's not just me but sad that this seems to be the general experience!
I almost feel I should make a point of going out and bfing DD in public as presumably if more people did it it wouldn't be regarded as awkward.
I am finding bf generally easy / enjoyable now, but particularly nice when DD is not well or having a difficult day, as it really seems to comfort her
Someone asked me why I was continuing after a year 'when there's no nutrition in it any more'
Ah here.. I think pass no remarks on them. Ignorance - BF is so good for them and it shows how dedicated you are. It is for some people and not for others. I am sensitive myself though and it is hard to ignore these types of personal comments. Keep on with it as long as you and child both happy.
I love the 'no nutrition' brigade Ask them if they think you start suddenly, magically lactating water, it's brilliant seeing their puzzled expression.
It's a shame that it has become "normal" to stop at 6 months, or ease off.
Like Eaurouge said, it'll be a combination of follow on milk marketing making it the "norm" to switch to formula; and many women needing to get back to work to support the household (most families rely on 2 incomes compared to 20-30 years ago) & feeling that bf'ing isn't compatible with work, which it is and there are laws in place to help with this.
I feed dd and she's nearly 21 months. I had a target of 12 months in my head but that came and went and we're still going and if I'm honest, I absolutely love it it's not all the time, it makes me stop still a few minutes a day, she is still getting nutrients and antibodies and its an excellent tantrum calm-down tool!
I feed in public if needed but not as often now as dd tends to feed on wake up mainly but if I can get it in to conversation and it is appropriate, I do. A friend of my dp's was telling me why her dd of 3 years old still had a dummy and bottle at night. I told her that I would not judge what SHE does for HER child; and then got in to the discussion that I was still feeding dd. she was really surprised but at the same time made a comparison to my boob being a comfort and her dd still having a bottle/dummy; which was her way of making sense of my choice to feed in to toddlerhood. I didn't judge her and she didn't judge me but I'd like to think I normalised feeding a toddler a little bit!
Totally with you, I started going to my local breast feeding support group 4 weeks ago because of this, my little man is 7 months.
I agree, and you do start to feel a bit like the odd one out when you attend groups for older babies and toddlers and nobody else is breastfeeding. Not quite the same as when you go to baby massage for newborns and half the other mums are still breastfeeding too. I agree with LLL groups, round here there is even a toddler group for mums who are breastfeeding past 12 months.
Thanks for the idea re breastfeeding groups - I never thought of them for support at this stage but it makes a lot of sense!
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