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My baby is not taking feeds

(102 Posts)
Summerlover Fri 26-Apr-13 15:18:21

Hi to all lovely Mums,

I am very new to mumsnet and in disparate need of help.

To start with I wanted to exclusively breast feed my chicken but he had jaundice when he was 10 days old and was in hospital for a night. There in the hospital the doctors put him on Aptamil and when he was discharged adviced us to do mixed feeding. Then he was diagnosed with severe reflux which he has until now. Can breast milk cause reflux?

My LO took just 270 mls yesterday and until now just 120 mls after loads of struggle. He is 4 months old I am really worried and stressed what shall I do?

Please help.

Summerlover Wed 01-May-13 20:12:32

Paeds say its not tongue tie where should I get him checked to be sure?

Summerlover Wed 01-May-13 20:13:09

I think it's me not him that I can't latch him to my left side.

JiltedJohnsJulie Wed 01-May-13 20:25:17

It is very easy to miss, there is a whole thread of MNers who have been told their Lo didn't have it only to find out later they did. My DS also had upper lip tie, so its worth getting that checked too.

Milk matters do a virtual diagnosis service but I'm not sure if its free. They are on 0845 26 99 574.

Don't know if you've got the details of your local la Leche league but shout if you haven't. They should be able to help too smile

JiltedJohnsJulie Wed 01-May-13 20:27:37

Just one more thing, don't know if anyone else can put up the links for this as I'm struggling. On youtube there are some good vids by dr jack newman.

Accentuatethepositive Wed 01-May-13 20:33:30

Do you mean these ones JJJ?

Also summer I know of people who have had tongue tie diagnosed and referral for quick treatment from going to the Friday drop in I messaged you about. If you are planning to go there hopefully you could get DS tongue checked.

JiltedJohnsJulie Wed 01-May-13 20:52:15

Yes they are the ones, thanks accentuate and glad too that you know of somewhere summer can go smile

Summerlover Fri 03-May-13 14:06:09

Hi ladies,

Thank you so much for being there for me. Accentuate thank you ever so much. The HV came in today she weighed him and glad his weight is fine. She has spoken to me about a lot many things and says that he has wrapped me around his fingers though it has to be other way around. Feeding wise she said he will take feed if he is hungry I told her but that's not what he does so, she said that we can play around and see if takes his feeds for the next few days. I am probably going to give it a try again and see what happens and get him weighed on tues. Thank you again ladies. Oh! She kept on emphasising about giving him just formula well that's not something I would do, I told get off in this one do, she said think until tues seems she didn't understand what I said. Thank you everyone I will keep you posted will get his tougue tie checked on wed .

HalleLouja Fri 03-May-13 14:14:18

Sling wise I think there is a sling library in South London here. Not sure how far it is from you. I had a connecta and it was fabulous but there are so many.

The HV shouldn't be pushing you to put him on formula. Bliming HVs. Can you see a BFing counsellor or a lactation consultant as they will have a much better idea than a HV I would say.

He hasn't wrapped you round his finger - you are his mummy and you are looking after him [hugs].

Summerlover Fri 03-May-13 19:20:34

Thank you Halle Accentuate has given me a sling today. Hopefully that should sort out the sling if not then I will check the website provided by you and see how we go from there.

Meeting a counsellor on wed if that doesn't help then will see the lactation consultant.
As per HV he should take his feed when he is hungry which would be like 4 hours at max well he doesn't he just had 70 ml at 9 this morning and nothing until now which I had to feed him whilst he was asleep like you said I am his Mum can't see him like that so fed him.

I still dont understand why he won't take his feed even when he is hungry.
Oh! I so wish I should have joined MN b4 may be my LO would have been on Bf only. Thank you any ways ladies for your help much appreciated.

HalleLouja Fri 03-May-13 20:15:35

I did manage to bf only my jaundiced baby but don't beat yourself up about it. My dd was topped up with formula but as she is my second I made sure I spoke to the good bf counsellor at the hospital who helped me wean her off formula.

But if the bf counsellor wasn't there the first time then I would have given up. First DC was in SCBU as they were premmie. But once you figure out who is useful next time (if there ever is one) you will know who to call on for advice.

First time its all so new and scary and the health professionals don't always help.

And breathe.

JiltedJohnsJulie Fri 03-May-13 22:14:21

Been a bit busy for a couple of days, but have caught up now, sounds like you've been getting lots of good advice (apart from the HV obviously).

Agree that a BFC should be able to work with you on reducing the top ups, if that's what you want.

How is he in the sling and how has he fed for the rest of the day?

GraceGrape Fri 03-May-13 23:45:08

Summerlover, I've just seen your thread and it sounds like you're having a terribly hard time. I am the mother of two reflux babies and the early months can be very hard to deal with, especially feeding . I see that your little one is on omeprazole and domperidone. Omeprazole is about the best medication available for treating the pain of reflux. My DD1 was a very unhappy, screaming, difficult to feed, poor-sleeping baby until we got her medication right. I was very worried about giving her medication at first but it really was the best thing for her. These medications are very commonly prescribed for babies with reflux and will not do him any harm. My DD2 was on omeprazole by about 6 weeks old as I didn't want to see another baby suffer like my first. Do you mind my asking what dose your LO is having, as it doesn't sound like his pain is managed yet and the dosage can vary.

Regarding bf, my first daughter was mix-fed for 3 months then FF. She vomited a lot more than my DD2 who is bf. After 6 months, we saw a good paediatrician who prescribed neocate formula - reflux is often connected to food allergy or intolerance as you've heard. She was much better on this, although still vomited. It doesn't sound as if your health professionals have been very supportive. I have found reflux to be widely misunderstood by many GPs. I would suggest you try seeing different ones if possible until you find an understanding one as this will be a great help to you. I see that you've already seen a paed, but was it one who specialises in reflux and feeding problems? Again, it would be really helpful if you could see one.

Finally, as your DS is now four months, have you spoken to the GP/HV about early weaning. I know it's recommended to wait until 26 weeks, but I know full well that when your baby is a very difficult milk feeder it is sometimes better to start offering them different foods as well. Don't do this without medical advice though, as there are many foods that aren't suitable until 6 months.

I hope things improve for you soon and you manage to get some more sleep. Good luck.

GraceGrape Sat 04-May-13 00:03:07

I also meant to say that I think your HV is talking rubbish. Milk feeding can be very painful for babies with reflux, which is why your LO is not taking his feeds. I know of some reflux babies that would only feed while asleep because of the pain. To dismiss this as him "wrapping you round his little finger" is awful. You sound like you're being a wonderful caring Mum.

Summerlover Sat 04-May-13 02:08:01

Thank you Halle for sharing your experience with me. Hi JJJ,will let you know how the sling is as soon as I use it. Feeding wise it's been alright much better than it was before where wasn't taking feeds at all. Rock him put him to sleep and feed him and that was every 2 to 2.5 hours usually or can go longer for 5-6 hours.

Summerlover Sat 04-May-13 02:21:21

GG that's such a relief to know on one side and justifies why he isn't taking his feed whilst he is awake. But on the other side it awful to know that he is in pain. After HV visit we've missed couple if feeds and pushed the feed to 4 hours instead of every 2 hours. What do you suggest I should do to feed him, carry on the way I was.

His dosage for domperidom is 2.5 ml 3 times a day. Omeprazole 5ml once in a day.

Oh! We haven't seen a paed by referral we have been to A&e several timed because of feeding issue. GP won't refer us to paed I think I will have to make a stand with the new GPS now and get a referral. I should have done that with the previous GP. If the new ones don't I am going to get health insurance and take him privately.

He has silent reflux so, it becomes difficult to know what'd going on until he screams in pain, bless him, but that is heart breaking.

Trying to be a good Mum and your post and other Mums post has given me the confidence to stand up to my decision and now I will tell HV that he isn't spoiled he is suffering, so she should shut up and help us resolve it.

Summerlover Sat 04-May-13 02:21:53

Thank you so much GG and everyone else.

Summerlover Sat 04-May-13 02:22:56

Accentuate I have sent you a message.

JiltedJohnsJulie Sat 04-May-13 08:37:52

Agree with the others, a 4 month old can't manipulate, they just aren't capable and you can't spoil them either. I also would never leave a bf baby for 4 hours without a feed. Wonder if your HV goes 4 hours without having a drink or snack, my 9 and 5 year olds can't manage that! Sounds like she is talking bollocks had out of date information and could benefit from some retraining smile

GraceGrape Sat 04-May-13 10:15:16

Hi Summer, silent reflux is awful, poor thing. I have really found getting the right dose of omeprazole has helped my DD2. The dose is weight-related so it might be worth seeing your GP to see if they can increase it - it should be able to control the pain.

I agree with Julie, 4 hours is a long time for a bf baby to go without a feed. DD2 would never go more than 3 hours, more often 2.5 hours. Also, reflux babies like to feed small amounts more often as it's easier for them to manage the milk like that. There's no reason to wait for hours (although feeding little and often at night is annoying! - I ended up co-sleeping with DD2). Hope things improve for you.

Summerlover Sat 04-May-13 20:47:26

Seems like now I have a troublesome HV who needs retraining. Not sure what bad I have done that I am getting pathetic professionals. Is there anyway that I could change my HV b4 it's too late.

After observing my LO for so many days like this I think I can easily say he seems to have some kind of phobia for milk now. We were grocery shopping today and he wanted to feed tried everything but he won't take it finally he went without any feed for 7 hours and he got overtired as well.tgis is what stresses me a lot even though he is hungry he can't take it ', I am thinking it definitely because of reflux.

HV must be crazy to say 4 hours she also said if doesn't take the full feed its his fault he needs to learn that he won't get any milk for next 4 hours. I think she is nuts because no Mum can see a hungry baby and not offer him milk. This is driving me crazy now. Need to sort out GP and now HV as well.

Accentuatethepositive Sat 04-May-13 20:59:19

Sorry to hear that summer. Hopefully you will get the help you need next week. If you really are struggling though and can stretch to the cost I would definitely recommend contacting the lactation consultant I mentioned. Good luck with the rest of the weekend

GraceGrape Sat 04-May-13 21:51:30

Summer, I re-read your thread and had a thought that might help. You mention that you are taking lactose-free milk. Have you tried going completely dairy-free? Reflux babies usually react to cow's milk protein rather than lactose (lactose-free milk still has cow's milk protein in it). It's not that hard to go dairy free - I've been doing it while I breastfeed DD2. There are many milk alternatives in the supermarkets, although I'd avoid soya as about half of babies that are intolerant to cow's milk are also intolerant to soya, but you can get Oatly (which is what both DDs and I drink), rice milk, almond milk, coconut milk etc. You have to do without yoghurt, cheese etc to and to do it properly you should try to read labels and avoid things containing dairy products. You soon get used to it and there are a lot of things available in the "free from" section of supermarkets. You should notice within about 2-3 weeks if it's making any difference to his reflux. Obviously, if you're still combination feeding this would be tricky though.

GraceGrape Sat 04-May-13 21:54:44

Sorry - forgot something, my DD takes 10mg of omeprazole a day (she is 7 months). The "safe" range when she was first put on it (at about 6 weeks) was between 3mg and 13mg so I'd say a 5mg dose is too low for your DS at 4 months if he's still in pain.

willitbe Sat 04-May-13 22:17:52

Please consider changing to anti-allergy formula (or no formula at all).

When I had my first baby, the health visitor told me to mix feed. It was the biggest mistake I ever made. For two years I did not know that the pain and suffering was from the formula milk. I am not anti bottle feeding, but when a child is milk protein intolerant it is often not picked up by the health professionals.

If you are going to continue with mixed feeding please go to the chemist and get the type of formula given to prem babies that is free from milk protein, soy and lactose.

I hope that you and you baby get some help and relief soon.

willitbe Sat 04-May-13 22:25:44

Also forgot to say that if you do go for breast only, don't stress over time taken to feed, just watch for wet nappies, this is the main sign that you baby is getting enough fluid. I found it hard to trust this rather than looking at the amount on the side of a bottle.

Try to trust your own instincts too, it is hard when the so called professionals try to say you are not doing it right.

With breast feeding just offer frequently, try to have a day in bed just cuddling and feeding if possible. If you baby is associating feeding with pain, then time just holding and comforting in between breast feeds might just help the like one.

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